This Goodbye Is Forever

On our wedding anniversary, my wife bought me a cheap, fifteen-dollar drugstore watch. Because of that simple gift, her first love flew into a jealous rage and had his dog attack me, leaving me blind in my right eye.

When my mother, infuriated, kicked the dog away, he ran crying to my wife, claiming my mom had abused his precious pet.

My wife, Audrey, refused to listen to a word I said. As a lesson, she had my mother locked in the kennels with our five Cane Corsos.

I fell to my knees, begging her, pleading with her that the dogs were dangerous, that they would kill her.

She was busy online, ordering an apology gift for the mans dog. She shoved me away with her foot, her voice sharp with annoyance.

They're professionally trained, Ethan. They're just for show. Stop being so dramatic.

To keep me from making a scene, she locked me in my room.

I broke down the door. I raced to the kennels and rushed my mothers broken body to the hospital, but I didn't have the money to pay for the emergency surgery. I had no choice but to call my wife.

She was in the middle of a candlelit dinner with him. The moment I mentioned money, she hung up.

By the time she came home, my mother was dead.

Seeing my tears, she tossed a platinum credit card onto the floor, her voice dripping with impatience.

What's all this melodrama? Your mother is tougher than she looks. You really think a few overgrown puppies could get the best of her?

She sighed, a sound of pure exasperation. Look, because she's an elder, I'll let it slide this time. Take this money, buy her some vitamins to calm her nerves. And tell her Ill give her a grandchild next year. That should cheer her up.

She didn't know. She didn't know my mother was gone, and that as for my wife... I didn't want her anymore either.

1

Audrey watched me, her perfectly sculpted eyebrow arched, as I ignored the credit card on the marble floor.

I gave you the money you wanted, she said, her tone clipped. Now go tell your mother to stop hiding and come out here to apologize to Milo.

Milo. That was the name of the poodle mix that had mauled my eye and started this entire nightmare.

I lifted my head, my vision swimming, and stared at her. I truly stared at the woman I had been married to for five years. I couldn't comprehend it. How could she so easily believe the lies of another man over me, over the evidence of her own eyes? How could she condemn my frail, elderly mother on the word of her high school flame?

My mom had spent half her life in a hospital bed. Shed finally, miraculously, gotten better. She hadnt even had a handful of good days before being torn to shreds by dogs.

And now, even in death, Audrey expected her to apologize. To a dog.

The image of my mothers mangled body flashed behind my eyes. A wave of grief and fury so strong it nearly buckled my knees washed over me. I pointed a trembling finger to the thick gauze bandage covering my right eye socket.

That animal blinded me, I choked out, my voice raw. My mother gave him one little kick. Just to get him away from me. And that was wrong?

My anguish, my hoarse questions, didn't move her in the slightest. Her gaze was as cold and hard as the floor beneath my feet. Milo nipped you by accident. And I already punished himhe got three fewer kibbles for dinner. Your mother, on the other hand, took it upon herself to physically assault him.

She crossed her arms. If I hadn't gotten there when I did, she would have killed him!

Across the cavernous living room, Spencerher one that got awaycradled the dog, a smug, triumphant smirk on his face. Then, in a blink, his expression shifted to one of pained compromise.

Audrey, maybe we should let it go, he said, his voice smooth as silk. I mean, technically Milo only bit him because he was yelling but Ethan is badly hurt. We shouldn't force his mother to apologize. He stroked the dog's fur. Besides, you were too lenient with Milo. Of course, she was upset. I'll tell you what. He feigned a grimace. I'll poke Milo's eye out right now, just to make it even.

He spoke with such theatrical brutality, but his hand never stopped its gentle, soothing motion. The performance was so obvious, so transparent, yet Audrey was completely blind to it. She panicked.

No, Spencer, don't!

The cool, aloof Audrey Hale I knew, the titan of industry, was suddenly flustered, practically begging him not to harm a fly on that dog's head. She wouldn't even consider a punishment as light as putting him in another room for an hour.

The irony was a bitter pill in my throat.

This was all because Spencer couldn't stand seeing Audrey show me the slightest kindness. The fact that she had, on a whim, bought me a cheap fifteen-dollar watch from a drugstore had been enough to send him into a jealous frenzy. Hed called his friends over, men who held me down while he sicced his dog on me, all as a punishment.

The security cameras in the mansion had recorded everything.

But Audrey couldn't be bothered to look. Spencer's tearful, twisted version of the story was all the proof she needed. It was my fault. All of it.

I had to admit, the power of a first love was something to behold. His dog was more important than her husband and her mother-in-law combined.

I tuned them out as they continued their dramatic debate. I hadn't come back for this. My mothers body was at the funeral home. I was only here to gather a few of her belongings.

In a daze, I walked to her room and picked up a bright, floral-print dress. It was the one Id bought for her the day she was discharged from the hospital. She had adored it, wearing it every chance she got, preening for her friends.

My son bought it for me. Isn't it beautiful? He's so smart, so thoughtful. My Ethan.

Her voice, her smiling face, flickered in my mind for a second before vanishing into the grief. My eyes burned and my throat tightened. Before I could even process the fresh wave of pain, a hand shot out and snatched the bag from my grasp.

You're not leaving until your mother comes out here and says she's sorry! Audrey yelled, yanking on the strap.

There was a sharp, tearing sound.

The bag ripped open. Its contents scattered across the floor.

The poodle mix, Milo, trotted over gleefully, snatching the floral dress in his teeth.

Something inside me snapped. I lunged forward, kicking the dog away and scrambling to grab the dress.

Milo yelped dramatically.

That was it. Audrey exploded. Guards! she screamed, and two of her security detail materialized, grabbing my arms and pinning me. It's a stupid piece of clothing! The fact that Milo wanted to play with it is a compliment, and you attack him? You're just like your mothercompletely out of control! Since you won't let her apologize, you can do it for her!

I watched, helpless, as the dog shredded my mother's most treasured possession.

Strong hands forced my head down, slamming it against the hard floor. Once. Twice. The sharp pain radiating from my forehead was nothing, not even a fraction of the agony in my chest.

Tears I could no longer hold back streamed down my face. A dark, wet patch of red began to seep through the white gauze over my eye.

The sight of the blood seemed to startle Audrey. She paused, then waved the guards off. It's just a dress, Ethan, my God. I'll buy you a hundred more. A grown man crying over something so trivial. It's embarrassing.

Free, I ignored her. I wiped my face, found another bag, and silently, carefully, folded the other pieces of my mothers clothing and placed them inside.

The blood was spreading on the bandage. Audrey's brow furrowed in something that almost looked like concern. Your stitches have opened. I'm taking you to the doctor.

She reached for me, but at that exact moment, Spencer gave Milo a sharp kick. The dog yelped again and scampered away, immediately drawing Audreys attention.

Spencer shrugged, a picture of helpless frustration. He's too smart for his own good. He sees you paying attention to Ethan and gets jealous.

Audrey was instantly consumed with guilt. Oh, my poor baby. It's my fault. I'll go find him right now. She started to leave, then hesitated, her gaze flickering back to me. If he runs off, someone could steal him. He could be killed. You go on to the hospital. I'll meet you there after I've calmed Milo down.

She turned fully, her voice hardening again. And I'm letting you both off the hook for today. But this is the last time. You can tell your mother that as long as she lives under my roof and eats my food, she will follow my rules.

She still didn't know.

I watched her run after the dog, too tired to say another word. I finished packing and left for the funeral home.

2

The air in the crematorium was thick with the sound of weeping. But my tears had run dry. I just stood there, silently feeding my mothers clothes into the incinerator.

My father died when I was young. My mother had raised me alone, working herself to the bone, only to be diagnosed with a terminal illness. Id dropped out of college to work, to pay for her treatments, only to have my wages stolen by a crooked boss. I was desperate, with nowhere to turn, when a sleek black town car pulled up beside me on the street.

The window rolled down, and there was Audrey Hale. She looked down at me from the leather-upholstered fortress of her car.

Ethan Cole, right? she'd said. I have a proposition for you. Marry me. Move into my familys estate. In return, I will cover all of your mother's medical expenses, and Ill pay for you to finish your degree, even graduate school.

Okay, Id said, without a moment's hesitation.

She thought I'd agreed for the money. She had no idea that Id been in love with her for years, ever since we were in the same class in high school.

Back then, I was the one who made an extra breakfast sandwich every morning and left it on her desk before anyone else arrived. When the other girls, jealous of her family's wealth and her effortless beauty, started to bully her, I was the one who anonymously reported them for cheating on tests, getting them suspended. When I saw them about to pour dirty mop water into her bottle, I switched it with one of their own, letting them drink their own poison.

Slowly, the bullying stopped. A rumor went around that Audrey, the untouchable princess, had a secret knight protecting her.

I never dared to step forward. The chasm between our worlds was too vast. We could never have been together.

And sure enough, after graduation, she went to study abroad and cut off all contact. When we met again, all those years later, she didn't recognize me as her old classmate.

It didn't matter. Just being with her was enough.

After the wedding, our life was one of polite distance. We were like roommates, two strangers sharing a roof but never crossing into each others lives. I knew she had no feelings for me, but I wasn't discouraged. Life is long, I told myself. Eventually, I could win her over. I poured myself into my studies, managed the household, and tried to be the perfect, supportive husband.

Then, a month ago, Spencer returned from Europe.

And I learned that she had a great, unrequited love. The one that got away.

Years ago, when Audrey's parents had pressured her to marry, Spencer, unwilling to marry into her powerful family and live in her shadow, broke up with her and left the country to pursue his own ambitions. In a fit of pique, she found mea poor student who happened to bear a striking resemblance to himand married me instead.

I was just a replacement. A pathetic stand-in.

Even knowing the truth, I didn't feel I had the right to be angry. After all, Audrey had been generous. She had saved my mother's life. So I stood by as she moved Spencer into our home. I held my tongue, treated him with respect, and yielded at every turn.

But living with him, I saw the man he really was. He was nothing like the kind, noble person Audrey described. He would accidentally spill hot coffee on himself and blame me. He would stage a fall on the stairs and claim I'd pushed him out of jealousy. His petty cruelties were endless, chipping away at the fragile trust Audrey and I had begun to build.

And now, with a spoiled little dog, he had taken my mother's life.

I watched the box of my mother's ashes be lowered into the ground. Kneeling by the fresh grave, my heart felt like a hollow, cavernous ruin.

Her true love was back. So I would leave. I would give them the life they wanted.

Audrey had promised to meet me at the hospital, but the sun had set and my phone remained silent. I knew she'd forgotten. I wasn't surprised.

After the funeral, I went to a print shop. I returned to that cold, empty mansion with a single document. I knocked on her study door.

Come in.

She was at her desk, immersed in her work. I placed the divorce papers in front of her.

Sign this.

Without even glancing at it, she picked up her pen and scrawled her signature.

Don't you want to see what you're signing? I asked, my voice tight.

She didn't look up. What could you possibly want from me, Ethan? Its your greedy mother again, isn't it? Putting you up to asking for more money.

My fists clenched at my sides. I opened my mouth to tell her, to finally tell her everything.

Bang!

The door flew open, slamming against the wall. Audrey hated loud noises. Anyone entering her study, including me, was required to knock softly and wait for permission.

But this person, this intruder, was met not with anger, but with a delighted smile.

Spencer! You have to tell me what that paper you gave me means, she said, rising to greet him. I've been staring at it for five hours, I've cross-referenced everything online, and I still can't decode it.

Spencer laughed. Decode what? It was a flyer for a pizza place I picked up on the street. I was just using it to fan myself. You're too much.

The powerful CEO, my wife, stuck her tongue out at him playfully. She wasn't angry about the wasted time. She carefully placed the junk-mail flyer into a silver picture frame and set it on her desk, admiring it like a piece of fine art.

The legal document I'd brought her didn't warrant a single glance. A greasy flyer from his hand was a treasure.

The difference between being loved and not being loved was a stark, brutal thing.

They began to chat, completely forgetting I was in the room. I quietly picked up the signed divorce papers and walked out.

3

The next morning, I was at my lawyer's office first thing.

Everything is filed, Mr. Cole, he said. We'll have her served by the end of the day.

I thanked him and stepped outside to call a cab. As I did, a message popped up on my phone from the home health aide who had looked after my mother at the hospital.

Mr. Cole, your mother left a few things here with me. Are you free to come pick them up?

I am, I typed back.

I headed for the address she senta private room at an upscale restaurant. As I approached the door, I was about to text her that Id arrived when I heard familiar voices from within.

Instinctively, I peered through the crack in the slightly ajar door.

Inside, Audrey and Spencer were linking arms, about to drink from each other's glasses. A group of their friends were cheering them on.

Audrey, you're too young and vibrant to waste your life with someone you don't love! one woman shouted.

That Ethan guy was never good enough for you, another added. Just divorce him and get back together with Spencer already! It's destiny!

All eyes turned to Audrey. She just smiled, holding up her glass. Marriage is what it is, she said, deflecting. Life is never perfect.

I had heard enough. I started to back away, but Spencer suddenly looked up and shouted.

Ethan? What are you doing here? His voice was laced with theatrical panic. Audrey and I were just playing a game! It doesn't mean anything, I swear! Don't get the wrong idea. Here, I'll I'll do three shots as punishment.

He dramatically threw back three glasses of whiskey.

The confused party guests instantly understood. Their faces hardened as they turned on me. He's just the stand-in, and he has the nerve to get jealous of the real thing? The arrogance!

Audrey shot me a look of pure annoyance. Get out, she said, her voice like ice.

I didn't need to be told twice. I turned to leave.

But this time, Spencer followed me out. Leaving so soon? Don't you want your mother's things?

I stopped and turned to face him. I should have known. He had paid the aide to lure me here, to make sure I saw that scene. He was a vicious man; this was a trap, and I was walking right into it.

I was about to ignore him and keep walking.

But then he pulled something from his pocket. A small, delicate gold locket. He dangled it from his fingers. Look familiar? Just dug it up yesterday.

My blood ran cold. I recognized it instantly. It was the locket my father gave my mother. She had cherished it her entire life. Yesterday, at the burial, I had placed it inside the urn with her ashes.

How did he have it?

Had he had he actually dug up my mother's grave?

Before I could even form the question, his fingers opened. The locket fell to the marble floor and shattered.

Oops, he said with a smirk. Clumsy me.

A roar filled my ears.

Spencer saw my reaction and his smile widened into a triumphant sneer. He leaned in close, his voice a low, venomous whisper. You know, those Cane Corsos? I raised them myself. They're bred to be vicious. I did it all on purpose, Ethan. I had Milo bite you. I suggested to Audrey how she should 'teach your mother a lesson'

He paused, savoring the moment. How does it feel, Ethan? To watch your own mother get torn apart, and be completely powerless to stop it?

This is what you get for trying to take what's mine.

Audrey belongs to me, he hissed. Stay away from her. Or next time, it'll be you in the ground.

My vision turned red. I didn't think. I just swung.

My fist connected with his face. Then again. The world dissolved into a cacophony of shouts and screams. I heard none of it. There was only one thought in my head.

Kill him.

Avenge my mother.

Stop it!

Audreys shriek cut through the haze. Her bodyguards swarmed me, pulling me off him.

Spencer knelt on the floor, coughing up blood. Audrey don't blame him, he gasped. He asked me to get the locket for him and I dropped it. It's my fault. He has every right to kill me.

Audrey rushed to his side, dabbing the blood from his lips with a napkin. She glared at me, her voice filled with disgust. It was a stupid locket! How much could it possibly be worth that you'd do this to him?

That's not I started to explain.

But she cut me off, her rage boiling over. She grabbed her handbag and swung it, the heavy metal corner catching me squarely on the forehead. Not what? she screamed. I saw it with my own eyes! Are you going to stand there and tell me Spencer is framing you?

The blow split my skin open. Warm blood trickled down my face.

I let out a short, bitter laugh and said nothing more. What was the point? She wouldn't believe anything I said.

I shook off the guards' lingering grip and knelt, carefully picking up the shattered pieces of the locket. The sharp edges sliced my fingertips, but I didn't feel it.

Seeing this, Audrey seemed to hesitate, her anger momentarily flickering. She opened her mouth as if to stop me.

But then Spencer let out a series of wracking coughs. Audrey, he wheezed, he's your husband. And his injuries are worse than mine. You should take him to the hospital.

Audrey sighed, her brief moment of concern vanishing. She turned her full attention back to him. You're too kind, Spencer. That's why people always take advantage of you. Her voice softened. What does it matter if he's my husband? You were the one who protected me in high school when I was at my lowest. You saved me. He hurt my savior. I should be making him pay, not taking him to the hospital. He can dream on.

She helped Spencer to his feet. Come on. I'm taking you to a doctor. We can't have a scar ruining that handsome face.

And with that, she led him away without a backward glance.

The world around me faded away. All I could see were the broken pieces of my mothers locket. When I had gathered every last one, I stood up and walked out, ignoring the pointing fingers and whispered condemnations of the crowd.

I went back to my mother's grave.

The earth was disturbed. The urn was gone.

There was no time for grief. I found it tossed aside in the bushes, cracked open. I fell to my knees and began scooping up the ashes, now mixed with dirt and mud. I held the filthy, broken container in my arms, checked into a cheap motel, and booked the first flight I could find.

This place was no longer safe. I would take her home, to the town where we were born, and bury her there.

That evening, a message from Audrey appeared on my phone. As cold as ever.

Did you get that cut on your head looked at?

A second message followed.

It's Spencer's birthday tomorrow. You will come and bring a gift to apologize. If you do, I will forget about what happened today, and we can try to make this work.

And a third.

Tell your mother she can come back, too. It's more comfortable here than wherever she's hiding.

She sent the messages, assuming, as always, that I would bend to her will.

I didn't bother replying. Instead, I forwarded the evidence of Spencers illegal ownership of dangerous animals to the police, along with a formal statement about my mother's death.

The next morning, my lawyer confirmed the divorce was final. I put Audrey's copy of the decree in a courier envelope and had it sent to her.

Then, clutching my mother's ashes, I boarded a flight home, leaving that city and its ghosts behind me forever.

I would never see Audrey Hale again.

In the private room at the restaurant, Audrey was still waiting, a hopeful look on her face.

Knock, knock, knock.

A smile touched her lips. That must be Ethan, here to apologize.

Spencer, his face artfully bruised, waved a dismissive hand. Well, I was partly to blame. It doesn't seem right for him to be the only one apologizing, does it?

Audrey was resolute. When you do something wrong, you apologize. Stop making excuses for him.

She walked over and opened the door. It wasn't me. It was a courier.

Audrey Hale? This is for you.

She assumed it was a gift from me, a peace offering. She tore open the corner of the envelope, but before she could look inside, two uniformed police officers walked past her and stopped at their table.

Spencer Croft? one of them said, looking at the man who had come out to see what the commotion was. We have a report, filed by an Ethan Cole, that you illegally housed five dangerous animals, resulting in the death of his mother. You need to come with us.

Audrey stared, utterly bewildered. Ethan's mother is dead? That's impossible. There has to be a mistake. I'll call him right now and clear this up!

She fumbled for her phone, and in her haste, the contents of the envelope slid out and fell to the floor. It was a single, folded document. A certificate of divorce.