I Died On My Last Birthday

The moment Miranda Simon smashed my birthday cake, I realized our five-year marriage was nothing more than a well-rehearsed punchline.

The cakea custom order my family had sent overlay in a heap on the hardwood floor. Vanilla sponge and fresh strawberries were smeared across the grain like a crime scene. Miranda didnt look at the mess. She didnt look at me with anything but a cold, sharpened edge of resentment.

Did you seriously forget what day it is? she asked, her voice dropping to a dangerous low. Its the anniversary of Becks mothers passing. And youre standing here worried about a damn cake?

The words felt like a serrated blade to the chest. Every birthday for the last five years flashed before my eyeseach one spent in a state of forced mourning, a heavy silence dictated by her.

My birthday happened to fall on the anniversary of the day Becks mother died. Beck was her "soulmate" of a best friend, the boy-next-door she had grown up with. Because of that coincidence, my birthday was a forbidden subject. No celebrations, no decorations, not even a stray smile.

When friends asked why we never threw a party, Id offer a tight, practiced shrug and say, Maybe next year.

But next year was a ghost that never arrived.

Driven by a sudden, hollow impulse, I followed her to the memorial garden. I watched from a distance as she stood by the headstone, listening to the whispers of the gathered mourners. They called her the daughter the deceased never had, and the rock Beck leans on. She was the "perfect woman" in everyones eyes.

Standing there, watching her play the role of Becks grieving partner, I felt a bone-deep exhaustion settle over me.

I walked up to her, the grass crunching beneath my shoes. Without a word, I slid the wedding band off my finger.

Miranda, I said, my voice steady for the first time in years. I want a divorce.

...

Miranda froze for a second, her eyes flickering with a momentary shock before settling back into a familiar, jagged impatience.

Youre really doing this? Because of a stupid cake, youre making a scene at a cemetery? This isnt the place for your tantrums, Jude.

Im serious, I said, each word deliberate. Im leaving you.

Realizing I wasn't backing down, the mask of the grieving socialite began to crack. The small crowd of mourners went silent, their eyes darting between us.

In a swift, protective motion, Miranda stepped in front of Beck, shielding him. She swung her hand, knocking the ring out of my palm. It vanished into the tall grass.

She gave me a look of pure, filtered condescension.

Is this what this is? A pathetic display of territory? Youre jealous because Im here for Becks mother? I told you, Judeshow some respect for the dead.

Respect for the dead. That was her mantra.

Every year on my birthday, there were no sunflowersmy favorite. Only endless wreaths of white chrysanthemums. No dinner reservations, only memorial offerings. No "Happy Birthday," no warmth.

Whenever my own mother called to wish me a happy birthday, I had to retreat to the bathroom and whisper my thanks in the dark, as if celebrating my own life was a sin I had to hide.

It never occurred to her that I owed no debt of mourning to her best friends family.

I opened my mouth to speak, but the words felt stuck in my throat, choked by years of silence. Seeing my hesitation, Mirandas tone softened, though it was the kind of softness used for a disobedient child. She held out a small bouquet of daisies.

Just admit youre wrong and we can go home. Ill make it up to you later this week. Since youre here, the least you can do is pay your respects. She was always kind to you.

A bitter laugh bubbled up in my chest. Everyone in our circle knew the truth: Becks mother had loathed me. She saw me as an intruder in the "perfect" life her son and Miranda were supposed to share. Miranda knew better than anyone that the woman had once purposefully fed me something she knew I was allergic to, sending me to the ER just so she could have a "family night" alone with her son and Miranda.

I dropped the daisies onto the dirt.

A collective gasp went up from the crowd. Mirandas eyes went dark, her patience finally snapping.

Jude Holloway, that is enough!

She lashed out with her foot, kicking a small, decorative brass brazier nearby. The hot coals spilled out, several of them landing directly on my calf. The heat seared through my trousers, and I felt the skin blister instantly.

I doubled over, a cold sweat breaking out on my forehead as the sharp, throbbing pain radiated up my leg.

Mirandas breath hitched for a fraction of a second, but the disgust in her eyes didn't waver.

Beck is starting at the firm tomorrow. Hes overwhelmed. Youre going to train him. And if you can't handle that, you can pack your desk and get out of my company.

Her gaze fell on the employee ID badge clipped to my belta job I had worked eighty-hour weeks to excel at. It was a threat, plain and simple.

I pressed my lips together and forced a nod. Fine.

A flash of confusion crossed her face, but before she could speak, Beck pulled at her sleeve, whispering about the service. She turned her back on me, her hand resting protectively on his shoulder.

I walked out of the cemetery, my leg screaming in pain, and dialed a number I hadn't called in years.

I need a divorce lawyer. Have the papers ready by tomorrow.

Miranda didn't come home that night.

She was never one for social media, claiming it was beneath her, yet she posted three separate, long-winded tributes to Becks mother.

Becks comment was pinned at the top: Miranda, having you here to talk through the night... I know Mom is looking down from Heaven and smiling at us.

I sat alone in our dark kitchen and lit a single candle on a grocery-store cupcake. I made a wish. For the first time in five years, it wasn't for her to love me back. It was for the strength to never look back.

The next morning, the sound of crashing and laughter from downstairs jolted me awake.

When I walked into the kitchen, the house looked like a disaster zone. The dining table was covered in blue frosting. Half-eaten cake was everywhere, and balloons were taped haphazardly to the walls.

Across a banner draped over the fireplace were the words: Happy Birthday, Beck.

My stomach turned. Of course. It wasn't just his mothers death anniversary; it was his birthday, too. For five years, Miranda could always find the time to celebrate him. She could drop everything for his birthday, his "promotion" parties, even the anniversary of the first time theyd met.

Miranda walked out of the study, seeing my expression. She didn't look guilty.

Beck was a mess after you pulled that stunt at the cemetery, she said, pouring herself a coffee. I let him bring a few people over to cheer him up.

When I didn't respond, she sighed, her tone shifting to an annoyed defense. If it bothers you that much, I guess next year we can

It doesnt bother me, I interrupted.

She blinked, startled by the lack of fire in my voice. Dont lie. Youve always hated having Beck in the house.

It was true. Beck used to find every excuse to stay over, sometimes even crashing in our guest room for weeks on end. I had spent years screaming, pleading, and fighting to keep our home private.

But that was when I still cared about what happened within these walls. Now, she could invite the whole city for all I cared.

My phone chimed incessantly. The company group chat was exploding.

Beck is a genius! That marketing strategy he presented this morning was incredible!

Not surprised, hes been Mirandas right hand forever. Excellence is contagious!

Beck, youre buying the first round of drinks tonight!

I opened the file attached to the messages. My blood ran cold. Every word, every data point, every creative hookit was the project I had spent the last three months building.

Miranda followed my gaze to the screen. She spoke with a breezy nonchalance that made me feel sick.

Beck was under a lot of pressure starting today. I gave him your project to present so he could get a win under his belt. Youre talented, Jude. You can just come up with another one.

I looked at her, truly looked at her. I remembered the nights Id spent in the office until 2:00 AM, the red-rimmed eyes, the missed dinners. She had seen all of it. And she had handed it to him like it was nothing but a scrap of paper.

Theres one more thing, Miranda said, her voice dropping into that low, executive tone. Beck likes your familys plot at the hillside cemetery. His spiritual advisor said the feng shui is perfect for his mothers re-interment. Consider it your apology for yesterday.

I stared at her, certain I had misheard. Are you insane? Thats where my father is buried. The plot next to him is for my mother.

My fathers dying wish had been to be buried next to my mother. Hed spent years scouting locations before they found that specific hillside.

Mirandas face hardened. Its a piece of land, Jude. You humiliated Beck yesterday. This is how you make it right.

Absolutely not, I said, my voice trembling with rage.

Miranda didn't argue. She simply reached into her bag and tossed a stack of medical bills onto the coffee table.

Your mothers private care is being funded by my accounts. Is a piece of dirt more important than the woman currently breathing because of my money?

The world seemed to tilt. The roar in my ears was deafening. I thought of my mother, frail and fading in that hospital bed, and the weight of the debt crushed the air from my lungs.

I swallowed the bile rising in my throat. Fine. Take it. Ill move my fathers remains tomorrow.

Mirandas expression softened into a terrifyingly smug satisfaction. She finally noticed the suitcase tucked into the corner of the hallway.

Where are you going?

A business trip, I lied, my voice hollow. Internal audit.

I turned and walked upstairs. I didn't need to look back to know she was already texting Beck the good news.

The next day, under a gray, overcast sky, Miranda and Beck arrived at the cemetery for the "transfer."

A small crowd of their social circle had gathered, whispering as I arrived.

There he is. The man who cant even celebrate a birthday or let his father rest in peace.

Beck and Miranda are so much more suited for each other. Theyre a power couple.

Its only a matter of time before Jude is out of the picture entirely.

I clenched my fists, watching as the excavators began to move the earth over my fathers grave. Beck stood there like a victor, a sympathetic but oily smile on his face.

Jude, man, Beck whispered, leaning in and gripping my arm tight enough to bruise. I just mentioned the view once. I had no idea Miranda would go this far. Youre not mad, are you?

I jerked my arm away, my eyes locked on the casket being hoisted from the ground. The shame was a physical weight, a suffocating heat in my chest.

As the workers moved to transfer the remains, Beck stepped forward. Let me help with the urn...

He reached out, his hands slick and uncoordinated. The urn slipped.

He let out a sharp, theatrical gasp. Oh my god! Jude, Im so sorry! I was just trying to help

The urn hit the stone path and shattered. My fathers ashes scattered into the mud, caught in the damp wind.

I began to shake. My vision went red. Before I knew what I was doing, my fist was flying toward Becks face.

But Miranda was faster. She stepped between us and slapped me so hard my head snapped to the side.

Are you insane?! she screamed. Youre going to assault someone in a cemetery?

The metallic taste of blood filled my mouth. I was past the point of reason.

Suddenly, Beck dropped to his knees in front of Miranda, his face a mask of trembling fear.

Miranda, please, I didnt mean it... but I have to tell you. The reason I wanted to move my mom here wasn't just the view. Judes been hiring people to vandalize her old grave. Theyve been throwing trash, painting slurs... I couldn't take it anymore.

Miranda turned to me, her eyes filled with a profound, icy disappointment. Jude. I didn't think even you could sink this low.

I leaned against the stone wall of a nearby crypt just to stay upright. You want to talk about low? I rasped. Then lets talk about the divorce.

I pulled the papers from my jacket and threw them at her feet.

She looked at the bold heading on the first page and recoiled.

Youre really doing this? she hissed. Fine. Get out. Within three days, youll be crawling back, begging for a check to pay your mothers hospital bills. Well see how long your pride lasts then.

She signed the papers with a flourish, grabbed Becks hand, and stormed off.

I collapsed to my knees, my fingers trembling as I tried to scoop what was left of my fathers ashes from the dirt. I felt like a ghost inhabiting a dead man's body.

As the crowd dispersed, my phone rang. It was the hospital.

Mr. Holloway? Your mother has taken a turn for the worse. She needs emergency surgery immediately, but your primary insurance and the linked credit cards have been frozen.

I felt the blood drain from my face. Miranda always kept the accounts topped up. She wouldn't...

I called the companys CFO. He sounded hesitant, pitying. Jude, Im sorry. Miranda gave Beck power of attorney over your personal accounts this morning. She said you needed to 'learn some perspective' before your access is restored.

The phone slipped through my fingers.

I didn't think. I drove straight to the office, my body vibrating with a primal, desperate terror. I burst into the lobby and ran to Becks new corner office.

Give me my cards, I choked out, my voice failing me. I need the money. Its for my mother.

Miranda stepped out of the adjacent conference room and shoved me back with a force that sent me stumbling into the glass partition.

Youre hovering over him like a predator, Jude! Youre scaring him!

My mother is dying! I screamed, my voice raw. She needs the surgery now!

Enough! Miranda yelled. You think Im stupid? Youre using your dying mother to scam me for money so you can hire more people to harass Beck. Shes in the best hospital in the state; shes fine. Im not rewarding your lies anymore.

I looked into her eyes. The woman who had once promised to build a world with me was gone. In her place was a stranger, cold and blinded by a lie she chose to believe.

Miranda signaled for security. Get him out of here.

I spent the next hour frantically calling everyone I knew. The cruelty of Miranda Simon ran deeper than I imagined.

Jude, Id love to help, but Im a little tight this month...

Sorry, man, Miranda already called. She said if any of us lend you money, were blacklisted from the Simon contracts.

I cant, Jude. Shes my boss.

I sat in my car, gripping the steering wheel until my knuckles turned white. When I finally made it back to the hospital, I looked at my mothers pale, translucent skin and pulled the heavy gold signet ring from my fingermy fathers heirloom, the only thing Miranda had ever given me that I valued.

Please, I begged the administrator. This is solid gold. Its worth at least fifty thousand. Just start the prep for surgery.

The man took the ring, looked at it for three seconds, and handed it back with a look of profound pity.

Mr. Holloway... this is gold-plated iron. Its a costume piece. Its worth maybe fifty dollars.

The sound the ring made as it hit the floor was hollow.

Miranda had given it to me on my birthday last year. I had cherished it, believing it was a sign that I finally meant something to her.

I sat by my mothers bed and watched the monitor flatline. The silence that followed was the loudest thing Id ever heard.

Five minutes after her heart stopped, my phone buzzed. A notification: Fifty thousand dollars deposited into your account.

A text from Miranda followed: I might have been too harsh. I just didn't want you hurting Beck. Use this for whatever 'emergency' youve cooked up. Ive set up a birthday dinner at the house tonight. Consider it an olive branch.

I didn't reply. I picked up a candle from the bedside table, struck a match, and watched the flame dance.

Miranda, your hollow love isn't worth saving anymore.

At the house, Miranda paced the dining room, glancing at her phone. The table was set for two.

Where is he? she snapped at her assistant. Find him.

The assistants phone chirped. His face went ghostly white.

Miranda... look at the news. Theres a video. Your husbands mothers hospital wing... its on fire.