Replacing My Secret Girlfriend Today

My secret relationship with Nicole lasted three full yearsbasically our entire college experience.

On the final night of our graduation trip, the class president, Laura, suddenly suggested we draw lots for room assignments.

This is the ultimate test of fate! Laura announced, her voice buzzing with an annoying level of excitement. "Boys, girls, doesn't matter. If you draw the same number, youre roommates for the weekend. Let's see where the universe wants you."

But before the game even started, Id overheard Laura whispering to Nicole in the hallway: "Look for the ball with the small circular bump on it. I saved it specifically for you and Jackson."

I reached into the cardboard box, my fingers brushing against various textures, and pulled out a sphere. I waited in silence.

When it was Nicoles turn, she pulled out number seven.

Laura didn't miss a beat, her voice booming through the common room. "And the other guest for Room Seven isJackson!"

Jackson. The guy Nicole had spent her freshman year chasing with a desperate, public fervor. He blushed instantly, a bashful smile playing on his lips.

The room erupted. Everyone started hooting and hollering about "divine intervention" and "meant-to-be."

I stood there, frozen, the air leaving my lungs. I watched Nicole. She didn't look away; she didn't protest. Instead, she walked over to Jackson with a soft, practiced smile and reached out to take his coat for him.

I found myself smiling, tooa sharp, bitter thing.

Three years. Three years of being her "secret," of waiting in the shadows for a public acknowledgment that was never going to come.

In that moment, looking at them, I made a choice. I was going to be the one to walk away first.

The room assignments were still being called out, but the energy in the room had already peaked.

Laura was handing out colored wristbands, shouting over the noise, "Listen up! Rules are simple: same numbers are a pair. For these three days, youre tethered. No solo missions, okay? Its about the 'experience'!"

Whistles rang out. One of the girls nudged Nicoles shoulder playfully. Jackson, still flushed, kept stealing glances at her while he fumbled with his wristband.

Nicoles lips curled into a smile. She stepped slightly in front of him, a protective gesture. "Stop it, guys. Hes shy."

"Oh, look at that! Already getting protective!" someone yelled. "Better watch out, if we upset Jackson, Nicoles going to come for us!"

The teasing became a roar.

I stood on the periphery of the crowd, the number three ball clutched in my left hand, my right hand gripping the handle of a heavy suitcase.

Before wed left, Nicole had shoved all her things into my bag. "Well be together anyway," shed said. "Carrying two suitcases is just a hassle." Then shed pointed to my new overcoat. "Ill be the one responsible for your coat this trip."

In three years, she had never once been affectionate in front of our peers, let alone offered to carry my things. Id been so stupidly happy, thinking this trip was her way of finally stepping into the light with me.

But on day one, she took Jacksons coat instead.

My suitcase felt impossibly heavy, the weight dragging at my shoulder, a dull ache spreading from my fingertips to my neck. I set it down and cleared my throat, forcing the raspiness out of my voice.

I raised my hand. "Hey..."

The room turned. Laura, still riding her high, grinned at me. "Whats up, Wyatt? Jacksons your roommate back at the dormsyou got some 'best man' advice for Nicole?"

Jackson stiffened, his smile turning awkward. Nicoles eyes snapped to mine. I saw it thena flash of tension, a warning look that said don't you dare.

She was worried about the wrong thing.

I just held up my ball. "Whos number three?"

Laura scanned the room until a hand went up on the far side. "Me."

It was Tatum, a girl who had always stayed on the fringes of our social circle, quiet and observant.

Laura laughed. "Tatum! Okay, I know youre single. Wyatt, what about you? If youre single, you stay. If youve got a girlfriend back home, Ill swap you for one of the guys..."

I interrupted her, my voice quiet but clear. "Im single."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Nicoles brows knit together. She started to turn toward Tatum, but Laura was already pulling out an orange wristband.

"Perfect! Two singles! Maybe the universe is working overtime tonight!"

I took the wristband and gave a polite nod. "Thanks."

As I hoisted my suitcase again, I could feel Nicoles gaze burning into my back. I didn't look back to see her expression. I imagined it was probably a look of relief.

Once the rooms were settled, everyone lined up to check in. Jackson went to call his parents, and Nicole lingered, moving like lead, until I was the only one left at the counter. She slid her ID toward the clerk without looking at me.

"Go talk to Laura," she whispered, her voice low and sharp, her eyes fixed on the lobby wall. "Tell her you aren't comfortable staying with a girl. Pay for a private room if you have to. I'll cover the difference."

I was busy texting my parents to let them know Id arrived. I didn't look up. "Why?"

"What do you mean 'why'? You aren't single, Wyatt. You can't just share a room with another woman."

"And you?" I asked, finally meeting her eyes. "Are you single?"

Nicoles fingers froze on the counter. Her voice took on that familiar edge of irritation. "These are the rules of the game we all agreed to. Im just respecting the draw."

"Right," I said softly. "Im respecting the draw, too."

Her jaw set, but before she could snap back, I grabbed my key card and walked away.

I hadn't gone five steps before Laura announced, "Everyone in the media room in thirty minutes! Ive got it booked. Were doing a throwbackwatching the documentary from our freshman year sports fest!"

I didn't stop. I just tightened my grip on my coat.

The freshman year documentary. The one that chronicled Nicoles grand, public pursuit of Jackson.

The media room was overflowing with snacks. As soon as Nicole sat down, she moved a plate of strawberries directly in front of Jackson.

A girl next to them giggled. "Nicole, youre so biased. You know Jackson loves strawberries, so youre hoarding the whole plate for him."

The room joined in. Jackson pushed the plate back toward the center, looking sheepish. "Everyone should have some. Nicole actually bought me a bunch earlier." He glanced at her. "If these aren't enough, she can just go grab the rest from the room."

Nicole pulled the plate back toward him, her smile indulgent. "Ill go get them. You just eat."

As she slipped out, the room erupted again. "One word from Jackson and shes on it! Hes got her wrapped around his finger!"

Jackson popped a strawberry into his mouth and looked over at me. "Wyatt, make sure you have some when she gets back. I remember you like strawberries too."

The door swung open, and Nicole returned with two more bowls, placing them both in front of Jackson.

She knew. Over the last three years, Id bought strawberries countless times. And every time, shed frown and tell me, "Don't eat too many. They're so sweet, youll just break out."

I picked up a tangerine instead. Laura called out to me, "Wyatt, wheres Tatum?"

"She had some things to take care of," I said, peeling the fruit without looking up.

Laura looked disappointed. "Well, looks like that match is a bust. But hey, at least our 'star couple' is going strong!"

Nicoles eyes flickered to me for a split second before darting away. "The movies starting," she said, her voice a bit breathy as she handed Jackson a napkin.

The documentary lasted two hours.

Everyone was hooked, cheering and laughing every time Nicole and Jackson appeared on screen.

"Look! Nicoles wiping his sweat again! It was a fifty-meter dash, girl, you were closer to him than the cameraman!"

"Water, fans, even sunscreenshe had the whole kit ready!"

"Jackson, seriously, she chased you so hard the whole school knew. How did you hold out for four years? Poor girl stayed single the whole time just waiting for you!"

Jackson looked at Nicole, his eyes softening, looking almost misty. "I just thought college relationships weren't stable. I wanted to wait until graduation to be sure." He paused. "I didn't realize shed wait this long."

A girl leaned forward. "Nicole, was it hard? Waiting for four years?"

Nicole looked into his eyes and gave a small, slow nod. "It was... okay."

Two words. Two words that supposedly contained four years of pining and loyalty.

The room sighed in collective sympathy. I almost laughed out loud.

Hard?

She had chased Jackson for six months with no luck, then pivoted to tennis. I was the captain of the varsity team. She asked me to coach her for six months, and by the start of sophomore year, she was the one who asked me out.

She was more than "okay."

Our relationship might have been a secret, but we were happy. We were deeply, intimately involved. Or maybe... maybe it was just me who was happy.

I took a bite of the tangerine. A girl next to me pointed at the screen. "Wait, Wyatt, is that the class secretary holding a parasol for you? Did she have a crush on you?"

The spotlight shifted to me.

"No," I shook my head. "She was just heading the same way."

"Too bad she didn't come on the trip," the girl said. "She definitely liked you. You should think about it. You guys would be a cute power couple."

On the other side of the room, Nicole was pouring water for Jackson. Her movements were fluid, unbothered, as if she hadn't heard a word.

I smiled faintly. "No thanks. Actually, I have a girlfriend."

Nicoles entire body went rigid. Her hand clenched into a fist around the water pitcher. I knew that look. She was terrified I was about to blow her cover.

The girl grabbed my arm, her eyes wide. "Who?! Is she in our class?"

Dozens of eyes locked onto me. I kept my expression pleasant and nodded. "Yeah. She is."

The room went electric. Everyone was shouting, trying to guess who it was.

Nicoles face grew darker by the second. She stared down at her phone, her thumbs flying. I felt my phone vibrate twice in my pocket, but I didn't reach for it.

"Shes busy," I said calmly. "She couldn't make it to the screening."

There were seven or eight girls who hadn't shown up to the media room. Laura looked ready to interrogate me, but suddenly Jackson let out a small "Oh!"

His glass had tipped, water soaking into his jeans. Nicole was instantly there with napkins, dabbing at his leg. He looked up, blushing. "Sorry, Im such a klutz."

"Its fine," she said softly. "Lets go back to the room and change. I don't want you catching a cold."

She led him out of the room. With the main attraction gone, the documentary lost its charm, and the group began to drift apart.

When I got back to my room, my suitcase was open. Nicoles things were gone.

I sat on the edge of the bed and finally looked at my phone. Two unread messages from her:

Don't you dare say a word.

Don't ruin the atmosphere.

The "atmosphere." Right. I was the boyfriend who wasn't allowed to ruin the romantic tension between her and another man.

It was a pattern. Like the charity auction junior yearId raised the most money, but shed asked me to let Jackson take the credit so he wouldn't lose his "Golden Boy" status. Or the tennis tournament where Id dropped out because Jackson said he "wanted to try competing" and she didn't want me to crush his confidence.

For three years, Nicole had been "good" to me. She shielded me from the sun in the summer and the wind in the winter. She did everything a girlfriend should doexcept acknowledge I existed.

But when it came to Jackson, I was always the one expected to step back.

Morning came, and my phone remained silent. I watched the sun rise over the skyline, feeling a strange, hollow peace settling in my chest.

The days itinerary was sightseeing. Nicole and Jackson, sporting their matching red wristbands, were inseparable. She used the expensive camera Id bought her to take photos of him at every "Instagrammable" spot, then took selfies with him.

While we were resting by a bridge, someone brought up post-grad plans. "Wyatt, you staying in the city or heading back to Chicago?"

"Back to Chicago," I said casually.

Nicole was unscrewing a water bottle for Jackson. Her eyes flicked toward me, sharp and questioning.

Laura nudged her. "Jacksons a local here. Nicole, youre definitely staying in New York, right?"

Nicole didn't hesitate. "Of course."

Jacksons eyes lit up, and he shifted closer until their shoulders were pressed together.

One of the guys looked confused. "Wait, Wyatt, didn't you already land that analyst job at the firm in Manhattan? Why are you leaving?"

I smiled. "I turned it down. I want to be closer to my parents."

"No way. Is it for your parents, or for this mystery girlfriend?"

The group crowded in, sensing gossip. My smile deepened. "Both. My parents miss me, and she... well, shes decided to settle down in Chicago too."

The cheering started up again, everyone demanding a name, but I just shook my head and kept my mouth shut.

At the next stop, Nicole cornered me outside the restrooms.

"Did you really turn down the job?" She was breathless with anger.

We had applied together. The firm wanted me for my stats, and Id made it a condition of my contract that they hire my girlfriend as well. If I pulled out, her spot was in jeopardy.

I nodded. "Yeah. My parents found a great position for us in Chicago. Were getting engaged once things settle."

"Wyatt!" Nicoles voice was a low, furious hiss. She looked around to make sure no one was listening, her face pale with rage. "Who gave you the right to plan my future for me?"

She stormed off, leading the pack with Jackson in tow. I stayed at the back, chatting idly with a few classmates.

That night at the buffet dinner, Jackson announced loudly, "The Perseid meteor shower! Didn't you guys know? Nicole said theres a viewing point nearby. We could see a hundred meteors an hour."

The group was instantly intrigued. Laura, however, gave a knowing smirk.

"Guys, have some common sense. You can see the stars from the hotel balcony. Don't go out there and be third wheels."

The realization hit the room. "Oh, right. The 'perfect' viewing spot should be reserved for the people who really need it."

Nicole was serving Jackson more food. She didn't say anything, but the smug curve of her lips said enough.

Jackson blushed. "You guys can come too..."

The buffet food didn't sit right with me. The flavors were too heavy, too cloying. I tried a piece of seafood, but it felt like it was sticking in my throat. I spit it into a napkin and stood up to find something plain.

Laura followed me, whispering, "Hey, Wyatt, I saw you posted about wanting to see the meteor shower a few days ago. Maybe skip the viewing point tonight? Don't crash Nicole and Jacksons moment."

I nodded. "I know."

"Top of the class for a reason," she patted my arm. "Oh, one thing you don't knowI actually rigged the draw. I made sure they got the same number."

I nodded again. "I heard you telling her before the game started."

Laura froze, surprised. Before she could say anything, someone called her name, and she scurried back.

I was opening the lid to the congee when Nicole appeared to grab some pumpkin soup for Jackson.

She spoke as if nothing had happened. "Im sorry about earlier. I shouldn't have snapped at you."

I didn't answer.

"I get it," she continued, her voice light. "Youre acting out because Im staying with Jackson. But honestly, Wyatt, last night I took the bed and he slept on the floor. We just talked. Its just the rules of the game. Nothing is actually happening."

I filled my bowl. "Okay."

She still didn't look at me. "Talk to your parents. New York is better for our careers than Chicago. We should stay here. Once were settled, we can find our own place."

I didn't respond.

As I turned to leave, she hesitated. "Wyatt... Jackson is really excited about the meteors tonight. I promised Id go with him."

She paused, then added, "The Perseids happen every year. Next year, Ill take you. I promise."

I stood with my back to her, the bowl hot against my palms, though I felt nothing but cold.

"Okay," I said quietly.

I heard her sigh in relief. As she brushed past me, she didn't forget to grab another plate of strawberries for Jackson.

After dinner, I went back to the room and packed. The outfit Id bought specifically for tonightthe one Id imagined wearing while we watched the stars togetherwent straight into the trash along with the sightseeing brochures.

I zipped the suitcase. It felt lighter now.

Id bought a ticket on my phone an hour ago. The flight was tonight.

Ten minutes before takeoff, the Perseids began to streak across the sky. I saw people through the terminal windows pointing and taking photos. My phone buzzed. One unread message.

It wasn't from Nicole.

Everything is ready. Your parents are heading to bed, and Im waiting for you at the airport in Chicago.

As the plane began its ascent, I leaned back and closed my eyes.

Nicole, there is no "next year" for us.