The White Bellflowers Were for My Brother

On my brother's bedside table, that familiar bouquet of white bellflowers froze me in place.

Everyone used to say it took ten years for Quinnthe girl whose flowers I'd toss in the trash every dayto become the only girl by my side.

Growing up, I'd always gotten away with things, relying on my good looks. My admirers came and went, but she, my childhood friend, always stayed.

Theyd often tell me I'd never find anyone like Quinn if I let her go, that companionship was the most moving declaration of love.

Just as I was finally ready to let my guard down and accept her, this discovery hit me like a bucket of ice water, dousing all my courage.

I've always had a terrible personality, but I just happened to be born with a face that drew people in.

The next day at school, Quinn brought me a red rose.

I frowned, didn't even glance at it, and tossed it straight into the trash.

Quinn paused, then, unfazed, leaned in with a sweet smile. "What's wrong? Did I do something wrong?"

From seven to seventeen, no matter how much I snapped at Quinn, shed always indulge me like this.

The worst time was when I accidentally broke a jade pendant her deceased mother had left her.

My eyes welled up, ready to apologize.

But Quinn just quietly asked if I'd hurt my hand.

Even if, later, she'd hide away and cry by herself.

Maybe it was just a coincidence.

I turned my head, asking in a muffled voice, "Why did my brother have the same white bellflowers you gave me yesterday?"

Quinn chuckled. "Nothing to do with me. I know you can't stand him, so I've never even spoken to him."

Right. Quinn and Leo had barely exchanged a few words. How could she have given him flowers?

I let out a sigh of relief, just about to swallow my pride and apologize to Quinn.

Then the school bell rang.

I scribbled a note and slipped it into her desk.

But as I did, I noticed a pink envelope tucked inside her textbook. It had a little heart drawn on it.

And I recognized the handwriting.

It was from my brother, Leo.

My fingers hooked the pink envelope, and without a moment's hesitation, I pulled it out.

As the letter unfolded, Leos familiar, elegant handwriting filled the page. He wrote about falling for Quinn the first time he saw her, about envying her when she brought me flowers, about his internal struggle, afraid to get close.

I patiently flipped through the pages until I reached the last line:

"If you agree, please give me a single white bellflower."

My gaze froze.

So it wasn't a coincidence. That white bellflower by his bedthat's how it got there.

The teacher was lecturing animatedly at the front of the classroom. I bit back my fury, slamming the letter onto Quinns desk, glaring at her.

The grating sound of my chair scraping the floor was too loud. The teacher frowned, calling out my name.

"Alex, what's with the fidgeting in class? You answer this question."

I stared at the formula on the blackboard, my mind a blank, filled only with the contents of that letter. Quinn whispered the answer to me, her voice laced with urgency and reassurance.

But I didn't want to say a word.

The teacher waited for a long moment, his face darkening. "Alex, what do you have besides a pretty face? Your grades are worse than your brother's, you're spoiled and arrogant, always stirring up trouble with girls, making a mess of this class!"

I just kept my head down, gritting my teeth, silent.

I didn't care what people said about my personality.

But I hated, absolutely hated, being compared to my brother.

I didn't look at the teacher, didn't look at Quinn, just walked out of the classroom, my face cold.

I'd barely splashed water on my face in the boys' room when I heard Quinn's hurried footsteps behind me.

Her face was etched with anxiety, completely unlike her usual composed, accommodating self. "Alex, please don't be mad."

"You know I hate being compared to him!" I glared at Quinn, my eyes blazing.

"Quinn, don't play dumb. You know that's not what I'm most angry about."

She pressed her lips together, a hint of hurt in her eyes, explaining softly, "The white bellflowers were specifically for you. I didn't know he wanted them, and I certainly didn't plan to give him any."

I demanded, "Then what about the white bellflowers by his bed?"

"He must have bought them himself, trying to make you misunderstand," Quinn sighed, her voice laced with resignation.

"Lots of girls in class like you, saying they'll confess after exams. I was scared of losing you, so I just wanted to make you a little jealous, to let you know I cared."

Her eyes held a pleading look. "I've already explained things to the teacher, don't take it to heart. I can wait, until you're ready to accept me, until exams are over, however long it takes."

Looking at the stubbornness in her eyes, remembering her unwavering presence for the past ten years.

The fire in my chest cooled a bit. I said, my voice still cold, "Alright, after the exams."

Quinn's eyes immediately lit up, and that gentle smile returned to her face.

On the way home from school, she took a call, frowning. "Something urgent came up. You go home first; I'll find you after I'm done."

I nodded and walked on.

After only a few steps, I remembered my water bottle in the classroom and turned back.

As I reached the classroom door, just about to push it open, I heard Leo's voice, a hint of a whine in it.

"Quinn, are you really going to wait until after exams?"

I froze in place.

The classroom door was ajar, and Leos voice drifted out, soft and submissive.

"Quinn, big brother walked out of class like that today. The teacher must be furious, and you still went to explain for him. Isn't that exhausting?"

"Sometimes I wonder, you've waited for him for so many years, given him everything good, and he... he never seemed to care."

"Big brother probably doesn't understand how rare it is for someone to wait with their whole heart. Just like I'm waiting for you."

He looked at Quinn with what seemed like concern. "I just worry you'll get too tired. If big brother keeps acting like this, won't you feel too wronged?"

No tears, no self-pity, no overt criticism. It just made my chest ache, but there was no outright malice to pinpoint.

I shoved the classroom door open. It hit the wall with a thud.

Leo turned, no panic on his face, just a perfectly timed look of surprise.

Then he lowered his eyes, docile as a harmless kitten, completely devoid of the awkwardness from moments ago.

My gaze landed on him, and I raised an eyebrow. "Leo, you're certainly more well-behaved discussing people behind their backs than you are in front of Mom and Dad."

"Worried about her? Its not your place to worry. How I treat her is between us. It's not up to someone who's barely exchanged words with her to stick up for her."

Leo's eyes reddened, but he only softly argued, "Brother, I didn't. I was just worried about Quinn. I didn't mean anything else. Don't overthink it."

Quinn, beside him, frowned slightly and took a half-step forward. Her tone held a hint of exasperation towards me, and a gentle protectiveness towards Leo.

"Alex, don't say that. Leo was just being kind, he didn't mean any harm. Why are you being so aggressive?"

Just that one sentence, but it twisted my insides into knots.

The year I was born, Leo arrived shortly after, premature and frail. The family's focus instantly shifted. He was given the name Leo, wishing him a life of joy, cherished by all.

And I was named Alex.

To bid farewell, to yield, to always give way.

Growing up, if he wanted something of mine, I had to let him have it.

My only friend was snatched away by his soft words: "Brother's just like that; you'll always feel wronged playing with him."

Everyone told me, "You're the older brother, he's not well, you have to let him have his way."

I was forced to become sharp, unruly, and difficult. Only then could I hold onto a tiny bit of what was mine.

Everyone doted on him, everyone but Quinn.

From the age of seven, she ignored everyone's accusations, ignored me throwing her flowers in the trash, ignored my cold remarks, and always, unconditionally, stood by me.

Seven-year-old Quinn stubbornly told me, "I love how you protect yourself! We're friends, and I'll always stand by you!"

"Someone who has to steal from others to thrive isn't worth getting upset over!"

But just now, for Leo, she frowned and casually defended him.

No favoritism, no excessive protection, just a simple word of caution.

Yet she knew perfectly well what I had been forced into.

And still, she chose to defend him.

I took a deep breath, refusing to swallow my hurt.

The next second, I raised my hand and slapped Quinn across the face.

Quinn's head snapped to the side from the impact.

She turned back, stunned, her eyes filled with disbelief and a flicker of pain.

I didn't look at her, nor at the bewildered Leo.

Tears welled in my eyes, but I bit down hard on my lip, refusing to let them fall.

The way to avoid being wronged wasn't to cry.

Turning, I bolted out of the classroom without a backward glance.

Leaving ten years of companionship, ten years of unwavering loyalty, all behind me.

I stormed back to my dorm room.

I'd chosen to live on campus after my family and I became estranged a long time ago.

A while later, my roommate edged closer, his voice cautious. "Alex, there's a girl waiting for you downstairs. It's Quinn."

I was listening to music. Hearing him, I replied, "Got it, thanks."

I picked up my phone and messaged Quinn directly: [Go away. Don't be a nuisance.]

Message sent. I flipped my phone face down on the desk.

My roommate stood there, hesitating for a long moment, then, as if gathering great courage, spoke softly. "Alex, my sister she's liked you for a long time, since freshman year. You're so handsome, you don't have to just focus on one person. Wouldn't it be good to look at others?"

His sister, Willow.

The only person in school who dared to openly defy me, who I'd pushed back against countless times, and who still wouldn't back downshe liked me?

That was even more laughable than Quinn's explanations.

I didn't respond.

The sky outside gradually darkened.

Evening study hall ended at nine. It was now 11:50a full three hours.

My phone vibrated countless times on the desk. Quinn's messages popped up one after another, but I didn't look at a single one.

Ten minutes left until the dorm gates closed. If Quinn didn't leave soon, she'd be stuck outside all night.

The screen suddenly lit up. The caller ID was "Mrs. Davis."

Quinn's mom, widowed years ago, raised her alone and always treated me like her own son. Every time I went to their place, she'd make all my favorite foods, always saying it was her blessing that Quinn stayed with me.

I sighed, finally picking up, my voice softening a bit. "Mrs. Davis."

"Alex," Mrs. Davis's voice was anxious. "Quinn has been standing downstairs for almost three hours. It's so cold out. Can you please go see her? I'm begging you."

"...I understand."

I grabbed my jacket and headed downstairs.

Quinn stood under the streetlamp, her voice terribly hoarse, laced with profound hurt. "Alex, you finally came to see me."

"This afternoon, when I met Leo, I really just wanted to make things clear, to tell him to stop overthinking and to stop meddling in our business."

"I was protecting him not out of favoritism, but because I was afraid he'd be manipulative, and turn around to spread rumors in class or at home, ruining your reputation and making things even harder for you."

"I know you hit me because you were hurt, because for so many years only I stood by you, and I let you down. I don't blame you, not one bit. I only feel for you..."

As she spoke, her voice choked up, and the tears in her eyes finally spilled over.

The girl's disheveled vulnerability was laid bare before me.

She reached out, gently tugging at my sleeve. "Alex, could you just... give me a hug? Just one, and I'll go straight home, I won't bother you."

The figure who protected me at seven, the white bellflowers she gave me at seventeen, her question "Are you hurt?" when I broke the jade pendant...

All my sharpness, in that moment, softened for an instant.

I didn't push her away.

Quinn immediately stepped forward, gently embracing me, holding on tightly, sobbing into my shoulder. "Don't leave me... please."

After only a few seconds, I gently pushed her away. "Go back. The gates are closing."

Quinn reluctantly let go, her eyes red, nodding and running towards the school gate, looking back every few steps.

I turned around, ready to head back to the dorm.

A tall figure suddenly emerged from the shadows nearby, blocking my path.

It was Willow.

I raised an eyebrow. "Good dogs don't block the road."

Willow scoffed, retorting, "And you're too blind to know what you're looking at."

She didn't say anything else, just handed her phone to me.

The screen was lit.

A clear photo, taken just moments ago.

In the blind spot by the corner of the dorm building, where I couldn't see.

Quinn was tightly embracing Leo, kissing him with deep, frantic passion.

Leo returned the kiss, one hand clasped around her waist, the other cradling the back of her neck, docile and dependent. There was no trace of a man who had been rejected.

Back in my dorm, I blocked and deleted all of Quinn's contact information.

Only six months until graduation.

No matter how much of a jerk I, Alex, might be, no matter how arrogant, I wouldn't waste what little time I had left on someone who was full of lies and playing both sides.

As dawn broke, I got myself ready and walked into the school building as usual.

But today, it felt like I'd gone back a few years.

In the hallway, many eyes were on me, whispering.

"That's him, Alex. I heard he strung Quinn along for ten years, treated her like a dog, and now he still won't let go, even trying to steal his own brother's girlfriend."

"Not just that. Someone saw him actively hugging Quinn downstairs by the dorm yesterday, totally clinging to her."

"I never liked him. He just uses his looks to mess with girls. I heard he used to constantly steal his brother's things. It's disgusting. Why hasn't he been expelled yet..."

And then there were the rumors about my chaotic personal life, implying Id been with countless people.

Every word was too filthy to even hear.

Just like before.

My freshman year, Leo had a crush on a girl in our class.

She casually complimented me, saying, "He's so handsome." Leo immediately burst into tears, telling our family and classmates that I deliberately seduced her, that I used my looks to steal his things.

My family, without asking any questions, pointed fingers at me, calling me inconsiderate, selfish, and malicious.

I got into a fight with the person who spread those rumors about me, beating him unconscious, my eyes blazing.

The school wanted to discipline me, and my family, because of Leo, didn't care.

I was driven to the rooftop, wanting to jump and end it all.

It was Quinn who rushed up like a madwoman, clinging to my waist, pulling me back.

She knelt on the ground, trembling all over, her eyes red as she screamed, "Alex, don't you dare die! I believe you, I'll always believe you! Everyone else can doubt you, but I won't! If anyone dares to say a bad word about you, I'll fight them to the death!"

She ended up taking a disciplinary action for me, and helped me explain to classmates and mend relationships.

But now?

Quinn stood at the classroom door, for the first time openly by Leo's side.

Willow walked past, leisurely remarking, "Are you waiting for Quinn to stand up like she did back then and say, 'He's not like that'?"

I didn't speak, just walked step by step to Quinn, my gaze calm. "Quinn, I'll only ask you one thing."

"You were with a boyfriend while still clinging to me, right?"

A flicker of struggle crossed Quinn's eyes.

The person she had once staked her entire youth on believing stood before her, tears welling in her eyes.

But in the end, she only said:

"No."

"You were the one clinging to me, it has nothing to do with Leo."

The entire room erupted in whispers.