Parting Is Harder Than Meeting

My husband's mistress and I share the same birthday. So, at dinner, my son, Charlie, asked, Mom, are we celebrating your birthday a day early again this year?

My husband, Sean, didn't look up from his plate. No time for that.

This year, Ms. Harris is turning twenty-five, and I'm taking her diving in Bora Bora. We need to take swimming lessons in advance these few days, so there's no time.

I hadnt expected that after five years of celebrating my birthday a day early, this year, there would be nothing at all.

Charlie, however, perked up. "I want to go diving too! Dad, can you take me with you?"

Sean nodded, silently agreeing, then looked at me. "Hannah, send me your birthday wishes on my phone. Whatever you want, Ill make it happen."

My birthday wish was for a divorce.

As I cleared the table, Sean made a call to Sarah Harris.

Charlie wants to come along too, is that okay with you?

Sarah giggled in response. Whats not okay? Are you planning something naughty?

Sean leaned lazily against the kitchen cabinet. Naughty, huh? He chuckled, fiddling with the new shelf Id just bought. Alright, you just wait till I see you.

While they bantered, I looked at Charlie.

Are you really going? Not spending Moms birthday with me?

Charlie tapped on his phone. Yeah, itll be more fun with Dad and Ms. Harris.

I said nothing, went back to the bedroom, and took out a suitcase to pack their clothes.

Suddenly, I remembered Sean and my first trip together. We were eighteen, and we were scammed out of 500 dollars just to hang a love lock.

Sean comforted me. When I make money, Ill buy all these locks. You can hang them however you want.

Our love story had been so passionate, so grand, why had it turned into this?

I still remembered when I found Seans flirtatious texts with Sarah on his phone. I cried, demanding a divorce, and Sean was so terrified he knelt before me.

Baby, I was wrong. I promise it wont happen again. Ill make her leave the company tomorrow.

Later, Sean openly gave Sarah the status of his girlfriend. Dressed in a perfectly tailored suit, he told me, Hannah, dont worry, I know how to separate home life from outside life. I wont let her affect your life.

I was so angry I smashed the matching mugs wed bought when we got married.

That night, I thought a lot. I thought of Seans awkward confession, his wedding vows, and his eyes, red and pained, when I gave birth to Charlie.

I looked at our son, sleeping soundly in his crib. The next day, I bought two acrylic mugs and accepted Sarahs existence.

My thoughts were interrupted by Charlie, who rushed into the room.

Mom, I dont want to wear these ugly clothes you bought.

I held Charlies small hand. You have a sensitive respiratory system; the wind at the beach is strong, you need something warm.

No, I dont!

Charlies crying brought Sean into the room, his phone put away.

Alright, Hannah, its hot in Bora Bora. These clothes are too much. The three of us will go shopping tomorrow.

You dont need to pack anymore.

With one sentence, he negated a whole night of my efforts.

I took out the nasal spray I had prepared for Sean and Charlie from the suitcase.

Since they didn't need it, I wouldnt give them anything.

When I dropped Charlie off at his after-school class, he bragged to the other kids.

My dad and mom are going diving in the Philippines soon!

A child glanced at me. Your mom doesnt look like she can dive.

Charlie let go of my hand. Not this mom. He quickly explained. Its another mom, prettier and younger.

If you dont believe me, wait after class. My mom is taking me shopping.

So, after class, Charlie pointed to Sarah, with her big wavy hair in a Rolls-Royce, and shouted.

Shes my other mom.

Charlie ran to Sarah, bathed in the envious glances of the other children.

Mom.

Sarah smiled in response.

No shame, Sean said, his hand on the steering wheel, laughing. You, a twenty-year-old girl, wanting to be a mom.

What? You dont want to be my baby daddy? Then Ill find someone else. Sarah raised an eyebrow, and Sean pulled her into his arms, giving her waist a playful pinch. You dare?

She immediately pouted, feigning weakness. I wouldnt, I wouldnt. Her laughter reached my ears.

Watching the two most important people in my life gathered around Sarah, I turned my back in self-mockery.

I once thought that as long as I didnt leave, Seans true love would still be me, and I could give Charlie a complete family.

But now, it seemed I was the superfluous one. As I walked home, a downpour began, and I took shelter under a bus stop.

I remembered the last time I took a bus, it was with Sean, carrying our suitcases after graduating from university.

There were no empty seats on the bus, so Sean had me sit on a suitcase, his hand tightly gripping the pole, shielding me in front of him.

Back then, our destination was a rented room. Today, we had our own home, but we no longer shared the same destination.

Thinking of this, I got onto the bus that had just stopped. My rain-soaked hands couldnt unlock my phone, and as the driver impatiently frowned, Seans calls kept coming in.

The phone vibrated and slipped from my hand. I scrambled into the rain, and the driver cursed, Wasting time.

As the bus pulled away, water splashed onto my pants, leaving dark mud spots.

On the phone, Seans voice was accusing.

What are you doing? Why arent you answering your phone?

Its raining outside, I

Enough.

Clearly, Sean wasnt truly interested in my situation. I just wanted to tell you Charlie wont be home for dinner. Sarahs taking the little rascal out for pizza.

You tell her.

Charlies childish voice came through. Im going to eat pizza with Ms. Sarah. Dont make me that disgusting multigrain porridge.

Then laughter erupted, Sarah sounding a bit smug. I told you no kid likes porridge, but you wouldnt believe me!

Alright, you win, Sean said dotingly. Youll be in charge of the house from now on.

I could almost picture Sarahs unrestrained, smiling face, a stark contrast to my current humiliation.

I simply said, Got it.

As I put my phone in my pocket, I accidentally felt two coins.

It suddenly dawned on me that Sean had once craved candied hawthorn from the elementary school gate, and the old vendor didnt use mobile payments.

I had specifically exchanged cash to go find him.

But that string of candied hawthorn was later forgotten by Sean on the dining table, leaving a sticky mess of syrup that was incredibly hard to clean.

I laughed at myself self-deprecatingly. The bus I couldnt get on, I wouldnt ride. I didnt go home; instead, I went to a lawyers office.

I waited on the sofa until ten at night. When I saw Sean put the sleeping Charlie on the bed, I brought up the topic of divorce with him.

Sean Davies, I will no longer interfere with your relationship with Sarah. Lets part amicably.

Seans usually impassive face rarely showed emotion.

Hannah, if this is because I didnt celebrate your birthday this year, I apologize.

Its just that Sarah is still a young girl, so its right for me to prioritize her a bit.

But I also followed Sean when I was young, burning through my youth until I became a worn-out wife.

I shook my head. It has nothing to do with her. I just dont want to be with you anymore.

Sean tightened his grip on the water glass.

I dont understand. Weve been through five years, why are you making a scene now?

Were going abroad tomorrow; do you have to pick a fight tonight?!

The moment the cup hit the floor, I was only grateful it was acrylic.

Sean put on his jacket and walked out of the room. Going down for a cigarette, dont wait up for me.

I next saw him at the airport. I ran into him, Charlie, and Sarah.

She still had that same smiling expression. Hannah, I specifically sent Sean home last night to pack, but he suddenly showed up in the middle of the night and clung to me for a while. Did you two have a fight?

From now on, just let him stay with you. I pushed Charlie towards Sarah, and Charlie happily grabbed her hand.

Sean too, I told him we could celebrate my birthday casually, but he went and planned a trip abroad.

I looked at Sean, who was checking in ahead.

When we get back, Ill have him make it up to you with a proper birthday celebration.

Sarahs face held a triumphant boast, and I suppressed all the words I wanted to say deep down.

I couldnt compete with that young body, so I wouldnt.

Sean took Sarahs hand, with its extra-long manicure.

Hannah, were leaving.

A rare hint of guilt appeared in his eyes.

Remember to send me your birthday wishes. Ill make sure to fulfill whatever I can.

Dad, hurry up! Dont waste time with her. I want to ride the big airplane.

Charlie pulled Sean and Sarah, skipping towards security.

After returning home, I developed a high fever. Feeling disoriented, I just hid under the covers. In a daze, I dreamt of Sean.

He was still twenty years old, holding my hand, playfully calling me his wife.

Good girl, sweetheart, take your medicine so you can get well.

He held the prepared medicine to his lips to test its temperature.

Perfect, drink it now.

When I woke up, all I heard was the loud ringing of my phone.

I croaked a hoarse reply.

Hannah Davies, why didnt you bring the nasal spray?

Dont you know the wind is strong at the beach? Charlie and I will get sick!

Sean dragged me back to reality, yelling impatiently.

Alright, just text me the medicines name. Ill buy it myself. Youre such a hassle.

The phone went dead, and the tears I thought had long since dried finally flowed again.

I profoundly understood one thing: Sean and I could never go back.

I itemized all income and real estate since my marriage to Sean.

I decided not to fight for Charlies custody, with only one condition: Sean must not have any more children, a promise he had made early on.

I handed these documents to my lawyer, and the divorce agreement was quickly drafted.

Before deciding to leave, I went to visit Seans mother. When I was in school, she would always have Sean bring me home, constantly piling food onto my plate.

Eat more, little Hannah, youre so thin.

Those words, to me, an orphan, brought the warmth of a home.

My marriage to Sean was natural, almost devoid of any heartache from love.

Thats why I swallowed my pride for those five years, nearly losing myself completely.

When I entered, my mother-in-law was on a video call. She looked at Sean and Sarah on the screen, an unstoppable smile on her face.

You rascal, Sarah is still young, you should be more considerate.

Sean ruffled Sarahs hair. Shes only young, but she has a bigger temper than anyone. She gets mad if she eats one more bite.

My mother-in-laws tone was doting. Little Sarah, you should eat more, look how thin youve become.

My movement to take off my shoes paused. When my mother-in-law looked over, I hastily lowered my head, hiding my bloodshot eyes.

My mother-in-law put away her phone and called out, Little Hannah, come in quickly.

No, Mom, I havent changed my shoes. I wont go in.

I opened my umbrella and walked through the park where Sean and I used to stroll during university.

Under the most lush tree there, we had buried our hamster, which we had raised together for three years.

Sean wiped away my tears, calling me useless. If I were gone one day, how much would you cry?

He sprinkled the last handful of dirt, then hugged me. I would forever remember his soft voice saying, Hannah, Ill always be with you.

He knew better than anyone that my parents had died young, and I had lived alone for over a decade. He was already my entire world.

But his world didnt belong to me alone.

I sat on a wooden bench in the park, watching the time. At midnight, I sent him the divorce agreement.

Sean, this is my birthday wish.

The next moment, my phone rang. I had never seen Sean so furious.

Hannah Davies, why are you sending messages now? Because I was looking at your damn message, I didnt hold onto Sarah, and now shes in the hospital from drowning!

I dont care what youre doing, you get over here now and take care of Sarah until shes out of danger!

After the call ended, I received flight information: a 2 AM flight, with two layovers.

It was the fastest way to get to the Philippines.

When I saw them, Sarah had already regained consciousness. The first to rush up was Charlie.

Bad mom! Its all your fault Ms. Sarah is like this!

I hate you!

I let his small fists hit me, but my eyes were on Sean.

He clearly hadnt slept all night and was now carefully feeding Sarah water.

Good girl, drink more water, youll recover faster.

Sarah looked at me. Hannah, you actually came. I dont blame you; its my own lack of skill.

After three days of diving lessons, I still didnt dare to let go of Seans hand. Im so clumsy.

Even if youre clumsy, Ill take care of you. Ill never let go of your hand again.

Seans eyes were overflowing with tenderness.

I was so scared, I almost lost you forever. If it werent for you, I wouldnt live either, Sarah.

Sean leaned his head against Sarahs face.

Even though I was used to it, I couldnt help but get red eyes, touched by their love and saddened by my own fate.

The doctor walked in with the test results. Ms. Harris, blood tests show youre pregnant, estimated to be six weeks along.

This news hit me like a bomb, my mind going blank.

Thats wonderful!

Sean, were going to have our own baby!

No! I rushed forward. Sean Davies, what did you promise me?!

I looked at Charlie; he didnt understand what all this meant.

Hannah Davies, do you have a say here?

Get over here!

Sean dragged me into the hallway.

Sean Davies, you promised me youd never have children with another woman!

Sean scoffed. You have my child, why cant Sarah have one?

What about Charlie?! Your money, your company, will it go to Charlie or to Sarahs child?

Can you be fair to both?!

I can.

Seans tone softened, and I exhaled.

Sean Davies, I dont want Charlie to turn out like me. Make Sarah get an abortion.

The words had barely left my lips when a slap landed on my face.

No one is going to hurt Sarah again!

My ears buzzed. I saw Sean extend his hand. Get out! Get out of my sight!

Sean Davies, I looked at him. Its my birthday today.

You promised youd fulfill all my wishes.

All I know is its Sarahs birthday today! His eyes were filled with disgust. I dont have time to look at your stupid wishes now. Get out, I never want to see you again!

Charlie, hearing the commotion, also rushed out. He mimicked Sean, yelling at me, Get out! Get out!

But I smiled. Okay.

Sean Davies, remember what you said.

I walked out of the hospital, and in the Philippines, I did the last thing I had planned for Sean.

Half a month later, Sean received a phone call.

Hello, is this Mr. Davies? This is the Chinese Hospital in the Philippines. It has been confirmed that a deceased person is your wife, Hannah Davies.