Despised for My Fear

The System said I was a crybaby, so it gave me the villain’s script.
Wiping away my tears, I looked up at my six-foot-three brother and stammered, “I’m sorry, but you’re a bastard, and I have to bully you.”
The System’s voice was harsh in my mind. “Keep insulting him! Slap him!”
“St-stupid… idiot!” I managed.
Then I clumsily rose onto my tiptoes, my hand reaching shakily for his face.
The slap was barely a tap. My brother seemed to enjoy it.

1
In the world of this book, the man who would one day become the most bloodthirsty and misanthropic Regent in history, Kael, was currently kneeling in the snow. Our father had just discovered he wasn't his biological son and had cast him out in the freezing cold as punishment.
And I was his universally despised stepsister, Faye. My role was to deliver him a bowl of scalding chicken soup during his moment of utter disgrace.
Not to drink, of course. To his legs.
[Stop crying! All you do is cry, you’ll cry all your good fortune away!] the System bellowed impatiently in my head.
[Sniff… but I’m scared.]
My legs were trembling so hard I could barely hold the soup bowl steady. It wasn't my fault. Kael was terrifying. He had sharp, fierce eyes and a commanding presence, and he’d shot up to six-foot-three. Even kneeling, he looked like a mountain. Worse, he was a battle-hardened soldier who could snap a man’s neck with one hand. He’d just rushed back from the training grounds and was still wearing form-fitting leather armor that did nothing to hide the powerful muscles beneath. His chest, rising and falling with each breath, was the most intimidating part.
I hesitated for a long time before finally getting my tears under control. The searing soup had already raised several blisters on my hands.
I walked over to him. “Brother,” I whispered, “I’m so sorry.”
Then I let my hands go limp, and the bowl tilted.
But Kael, hearing my apology, had already turned. With a flick of two fingers, he batted the bowl aside before it could hit him. Only a few drops of soup splashed onto his thigh.
He frowned, his expression darkening as he prepared to question me.
But then two streams of fresh tears burst from my eyes.
The System was yelling at me again.
[Are you an idiot? Why did you say sorry? Are you brain-dead?!]
[I’m sorry, I’ve never done anything like this before.]
[Do you want to complete this mission and leave this world or not? I’m warning you, if you keep being such a coward, I’ll leave you here to be tortured to death by Kael after he turns evil!]
[I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!]
My apologies turned into gulping sobs.
Kael’s anger melted into exasperation.
“Were you holding that for a long time?” he asked suddenly, his gaze falling on the blisters on my palms.
I nodded.
“Don’t play the saint right now,” he said coldly. “It’s distracting, unsightly, and you’ve stained my clothes.”
I froze.
In the original story, Faye scalded Kael’s leg so badly that, combined with the prolonged kneeling, he became permanently crippled. He was only healed later when he met the story's heroine, who nursed him back to health. Kael never forgot what Faye did. Once he became Regent, he had her branded with a hot iron every day. They would let the wounds heal, then tear them open and brand her again.
Cruelty and a long memory were Kael’s defining traits. A loud mouth and a painful ending were mine.
The System let out a screech of frustration. [Why does he think you were bringing him soup to drink? Is he crazy? Why is he trying to see the good in you?]
Because I’m just a timid, soft-hearted person, I explained silently, not daring to say it to the System.
[Fix this! Now! Kick him! Kick him a few times, try to break his leg!]
I scrambled to obey. I lifted my right foot.
Kael, who had just looked away with a cold, dismissive expression, suddenly went rigid. He slowly lowered his gaze.
A delicate, embroidered slipper was pressed against his lower abdomen, grinding back and forth. The pressure wasn't heavy. It didn't hurt. But the single pearl on the toe of the slipper trembled nervously.
My voice was small and nasal as I sniffled, “Brother, are you angry now?”

2
[! HOST! YOU CALL THAT A KICK? I COULD BREATHE ON HIM HARDER THAN THAT!] the System roared.
I held back my tears, determined not to cry in front of Kael again. The System’s scolding left me flustered. I started to pull my foot away, but another sharp reprimand from the System made me press it back against him.
[But… I think he is angry. His ears are all red,] I whispered in my defense.
Kael’s ears were indeed red—a translucent, crimson hue, as if all the blood in his body had rushed to them. He stared down at my slipper, then shot me an icy glare.
“Faye, do you have any idea what you’re doing?”
That scared me even more. Ignoring the System’s threats, I started sobbing again. “I’m sorry!” I whimpered, trying to retract my foot.
But this time, Kael’s hand shot out and grabbed my ankle. His palm was searingly hot, his long fingers wrapping around me with ease.
Caught off guard, I stumbled and fell in a clumsy heap in the snow right in front of him. The tears I’d been holding back finally came crashing down.
Only then did Kael slowly release me. He tilted his chin up, looking down at my pathetic, sprawling form with an air of indifference. “If you ever come near me again, it won’t be just a fall.”
I nodded, trembling, and scrambled away. After a few steps, I stopped and turned back. I gave him a deep bow, repeating, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”
Then I rushed forward again, intending to pat the footprint off his clothes. But my hand brushed against a hard, raised object beneath the fabric.
!
He had a dagger hidden there!
For the first time, a flicker of panic crossed Kael’s face. He seized my wrist, grabbing my collar and pulling me up so we were eye to eye. “Don’t get any ideas. It’s just that… it’s been a long time… so it’s easy to…”
He took a deep, steadying breath, cutting off his own vague explanation. “Get away from me!” he snarled.
Coming from a man who had seen battle, the force of his voice was enough to make my legs turn to jelly. I stumbled away, my feet sinking deep into the snow with every panicked step.
Once I was back in my room, I finally caught my breath enough to speak to the System. “That counts as a success, right, Mr. System?”
I ticked off the points on my fingers. “I spilled the soup, I kicked him a bunch, and he got angry and yelled at me.”
The System was speechless. [Your next mission,] it said, its voice dripping with annoyance, [is to imprison Kael after he’s thrown out of the family. You will whip him and humiliate him every day.]
“How… how do I humiliate him?”
[Just improvise… no, forget it. When the time comes, you’ll listen to me. Do exactly as I say. Not one word more, not one action more. Got it?]
I nodded obediently.
But the System still wasn't convinced.
[Faye, do you understand what ‘do exactly as I say’ means? If I tell you to breathe hard, you don’t get to breathe soft. If I tell you not to cry, you suck those tears right back in!]
I clenched my fists. “I’ll try my best next time! I’m sorry, Mr. System. I messed things up for you this time.”
That seemed to satisfy it.
[By the way, the source text is vague about this part of Kael’s life. So you only need to remember one line. You have to get this line right.]
The System’s voice changed, mimicking a tone that was chillingly cool and flippant, cruel and sharp.
[Brother, for the rest of your life, you are fit for only one thing: to be my dog.]

3
When Kael was finally cast out, his body was covered in wounds from being beaten with rods. His thin linen clothes were no match for the biting wind. The only things he took with him were the sword he had earned through his military service and a scented sachet his mother had left him.
He was a lonely figure, but his back was ramrod straight. Even in defeat, he hadn't lost his formidable spirit. I thought he would have no lingering attachment to our home, but as he stood at the gate, he suddenly turned and asked a servant, “Where is Faye?”
The servant’s face was hard. “Kael, you are no longer part of this family. Why should we report Miss Faye’s whereabouts to you?”
A flicker of something crossed Kael’s eyes, but it was quickly replaced by a cold sneer. “I was just relieved that little pest wasn't here to get in my way. From now on, this family and I go our separate ways.”
Hiding in a nearby alley, I flinched when I heard that. How did he know I was planning to get in his way?
[Stop shaking! He’s coming! Grab the club and go! Hit him over the head and drag him into the carriage!] the System snapped.
I scrambled out of the alley. This time, I didn’t waste time with pleasantries. I just raised the large wooden club.
THWACK!
Kael collapsed without a sound.
Only then did I whisper, “I’m sorry, Brother.”
Thankfully, I had swept the ground beforehand and even laid down a small mat. It would be so rude to let him fall face-first into the mud.
I let out a sigh of relief and hooked my arms under his, dragging him toward the carriage. Kael was thinner than I’d imagined. Up close, I could see how his cheekbones jutted out and how his eyes were slightly sunken.
I sighed again. He was barely twenty, yet he had to endure betrayal, punishment, and exile. And through it all, he remained so strong, never shedding a single tear.
Not like me. Just thinking about what he was going through made my eyes well up. I really admired him. If I had met him in my own world, I would have tried my best to be his friend.
He was so big, I was afraid I’d lose my grip and his head would hit the carriage door. So I gently cradled his head against my chest to steady him. Kael was unconscious, and the System didn’t care about these small details.
After I got him inside, I realized he was burning up with a fever, his face flushed a deep red.
[Why do you care? He won’t die. You could stab him seven or eight times and he’d still be fine. He’s the male lead,] the System grumbled.
I hardened my heart, climbed into the driver’s seat, and urged the horses toward my private villa.
I was born to my father’s second wife, making Kael and I half-siblings. Now, I guess we were nothing to each other. My mother came from a wealthy merchant family and had left me a country estate for summer retreats. For me, it was a paradise. For Kael, it was about to become the crucible where he would be reforged in fire.
I fastened an iron collar around his neck and locked shackles on his wrists and ankles. Kael’s head lolled forward, completely unaware as I tied him to a chair with thick ropes and even removed his shirt.
Everything was ready. All I had to do was wait for him to wake up.
Then the humiliation could begin.

4
[When he wakes up, you’re going to douse him with a bucket of cold water. Then, you whip him. Whip him until he’s furious, struggling against his bonds but completely helpless. Got it?]
I nodded obediently.
[And then,] the System continued, [at his moment of ultimate shame, you look at him with cold, merciless contempt and tell him to be your dog. Understood?]
I nodded furiously. I’d been practicing the line for days. I didn’t want to disappoint Mr. System, who had the misfortune of being paired with a useless crybaby like me.
I picked up the bucket, suppressing the anxiety and pity rising in my chest.
[This time, you can’t just splash a little, and you can’t miss. Aim for his face and dump the whole thing on him!] the System said excitedly.
I gritted my teeth, extended my arms, and was about to throw the water when—
Kael’s eyes snapped open.
“What are you doing?”
A wave of cold fury washed over me. I stumbled backward, tripped on the whip I’d left on the floor, and the entire bucket of ice-cold water sloshed all over me.
SPLASH!
My clothes clung to my skin, the cold seeping deep into my bones.
Don’t cry. Don’t cry!
I shivered violently, biting my lip to hold back a sob.
The chains rattled as Kael instinctively tried to stand, only to be held fast by the ropes. His eyes were fixed on me. “Faye, what kind of game are you playing now?!”
[You! You! Do you have butter on your feet? Why do you fall everywhere you go?!] the System raged.
“Mr. System, I’m sorry,” I explained quickly. “My arms were just so sore, I couldn’t hold the bucket steady. I’m sorry.”
[So what if he’s awake? Why are you scared? Just throw the water!] the System howled.
“But it would get in his eyes,” I whispered. “The water isn’t clean. He could get an infection.”
The System sighed in exasperation. [Fine, fine! Getting paired with a useless host like you is so annoying! Listen up. Repeat after me, word for word.]
The System’s voice became a cold sneer. [Brother, after all, we were family once. You’ve been so kind to me over the years. How could I possibly let you go so easily?]
Hugging my freezing body, I stood up and forced a malicious smile. “Brother, after all, we were family once. You’ve been so kind to me over the years. How could I possibly let you go so easily?”
I didn’t realize that, to an outsider, my eyes—reddened from the cold and glistening with unshed tears—looked utterly heartbreaking. My voice was fragile, yet my face was stretched into a painful smile.
[Huh… something about that doesn’t feel right,] the System muttered, confused.
Kael, for his part, showed no signs of anger. Alarmingly, the cold fury in his eyes had vanished completely. He wasn't even glaring anymore.
“If you couldn’t bear to let me go,” he said, “why didn’t you come to see me off when I left?”
[??? Are you insane?! How can you say something so disgusting?!] the System shrieked. [Who cares if she came to see you off! She’s your enemy!]
I parroted the System. “Who cares if I came to see you off! I’m your enemy!”
I had no idea how utterly bizarre that sounded coming from me. My voice was small and soft, turning the harsh words into something that sounded like a petulant, twisted form of affection.
Kael actually smiled.
[I didn’t tell you to say that! Take it back!] the System sputtered, equally stunned.
How was I supposed to take back something I’d already said? The System’s scolding left me flustered. I looked at Kael miserably. “Just pretend you didn’t hear that last part.”
[Forget it, forget it! Just grab the whip and hit him!]
I quickly picked up the whip, my hand gripping the handle tightly. I had practiced for hours by myself so I wouldn’t accidentally hit myself. I stared at his bare chest.
This time, I would get it right.

5
The thin whip cut through the air, wrapping around Kael’s side.
CRACK!
The sound was sharp and clear. A thin red welt appeared on his lower abdomen, slowly spreading into a wider mark as the pain set in.
“Ngh…” he grunted softly, his eyes lifting to meet mine.
[It’s working! Keep hitting him!]
But I didn't share the System’s excitement. I felt awful. The cellar was already cold, and I was soaked to the bone. It felt like my insides were freezing solid. A sudden, burning pain shot through my lungs, and I couldn't catch my breath.
Forcing myself to stay composed, I replied politely, “Yes, thank you for your help, Mr. System.”
The next time the whip fell, my aim was off. The tip of it flicked against the inside of his thigh.
Kael’s eyebrows shot up, a dark fire igniting in the depths of his eyes.
“...Careful…”
I whispered to the System, “Mr. System, does this count as him being angry?”
But the System asked, [What’s wrong with you? Your voice sounds strange.]
I shook my head, trying to sound strong. “It’s nothing, just a little tired. I can finish the mission.”
My vision was starting to blur, seeing double. I straightened up with a great effort and delivered my final line to Kael.
“Brother, for the rest of your life, you are fit for only one thing: to be my dog.”
I couldn’t hear if he responded. I swayed on my feet, took a few delirious steps, and collapsed onto his lap.
Huh? Where does he keep that dagger? I didn't see it before, but I can feel it again now.
That was my last thought before I fainted.

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