Love is All

The year I went undercover, I took a bullet for the city’s most feared crime lord to prove my loyalty.
Then, for three years, nothing. A black void where my memory used to be.
The day I woke up, I tentatively reached out my hand. The man before me knelt with practiced ease, bringing his face close to my palm.
“Can you go a little easy on me today?” he murmured, his voice laced with a strange sort of grievance. “I have a meeting later.”

1
I was utterly dumbfounded.
“H-h-h-honey…”
The word was barely out of my mouth before Eddie gently took my hand, his thumb stroking my knuckles. “There are people watching, angel. Save it for when we get home, okay?”
Excuse me?
Was this the same Eddie Dillon? The ruthless, decisive crime lord whose name was whispered in fear across the city?
My last memory of him was the cold steel of his gun pressed against my forehead, his eyes burning with disgust as he spat, “Get away from me!”
Back then, I couldn’t even look at him without getting a death glare in return, let alone touch him.
But now? He wasn’t just initiating contact; he was doing it with a look of pure, docile submission.
And the most insane part? Everyone else in the room acted like this was just another Tuesday.
Panic clawed at my throat, and I tried to snatch my hand back. His grip tightened, a dangerous glint entering his eyes.
“Ava,” he purred, his voice dropping low. “Why aren’t you hitting me?” His eyes narrowed. “You’ve fallen for that pretty boy, haven’t you? Is that it?”
He didn’t wait for an answer. “Fine. I’ll have him shipped off to some godforsaken desert until he’s begging for a shadow.”
He was being completely unreasonable. But I knew Eddie. He wasn’t a man of empty threats.
Gritting my teeth, I raised my other hand and swung.
The slap echoed in the silent room.
He didn’t even flinch.
One side of his perfect face instantly flushed a deep red.
My hand trembled, a cold dread washing over me. I half-expected him to pull the gun from his waistband and end me right there.
Instead, he touched his cheek, his lips moving almost imperceptibly.
“That hurt.”
Well, what was I supposed to do about it? You asked for it. You want me to kiss it better?
The thought had barely formed when Eddie dropped to both knees, pressing his bruised cheek into my palm and nuzzling against it.
“Kiss it better, Ava,” he whispered.
Oh, for God’s sake. Just let the world end now.

2
Three years ago, I was sent in as a mole.
It did not start well.
Eddie Dillon was a ghost, a phantom. Getting close to him was like trying to catch smoke. He was always flanked by a legion of bodyguards. My only way in was to get a job at a high-end club he owned.
After weeks of waiting, I finally got word he was coming. I was desperate, reckless. I decided to show off by opening a beer bottle with my bare hands.
The cap shot off like a bullet and ricocheted right off Eddie’s nose. The beer foamed over, drenching his custom-tailored suit.
That night, I learned what it felt like to be pinned by a gaze that could strip the soul from your bones.
My punishment? Bathroom duty. For a month.
Then, my chance came again. Eddie was back at the club, this time for a business meeting. My handler had intel that he was getting into some dirty dealings and I had to get eyes on it.
I begged the club manager for a chance.
She gave me a long, pitying look. “Honey, you’re gorgeous, you’ve got a great body, but…” She squeezed her eyes shut and forced the words out. “The boss isn’t into men.”
Oh, right. I forgot. I’d kept my hair short, and when I first applied, I saw all the bombshell waitresses had long, flowing hair. On a whim, I’d lied and said I was a guy.
I stamped my foot in frustration. “But what if he is? Secretly?” I pressed. “Think about it! He comes here all the time and never so much as looks at any of the girls. He’s always alone.”
A flicker of understanding crossed her face. I’d gotten to her.
She came back with a sheer, mesh top.
I waved my hands frantically. No way. My chest was… noticeable. It would give me away in a second.
I’d heard that men of his stature often had… peculiar tastes.
“Get me a schoolgirl outfit,” I said.
I scrubbed my face clean of all makeup, applying only a slick of strawberry-flavored lip balm.
When I pushed the door open to the private room, every man inside froze, their drinks halfway to their lips. A kind-looking older man spoke up. “You lost, kid?”
My eyes found Eddie. He looked bored, unimpressed. I pitched my voice high and innocent. “Big brother?”
His brow furrowed. “You’ve got the wrong person.”
I rushed toward him, not seeing the empty bottle on the floor. My foot landed on it, and I went down.
It was a perfect slide, like a baseball player stealing home, that brought my face dangerously close to… well, his lap.
Mortification burned through me.
He extended a single finger and tapped my forehead. “Where do you think you’re looking?”
I looked up, my hands finding his knees, giving them a hopeful squeeze. “Please, brother, take me in.” The tears came on command, hot and fast. “My dad’s a gambling addict, he lost everything. My mom’s too sick to get out of bed, and my little sister… she hasn’t eaten in days.”
Eddie flicked a lighter open and closed, the flame dancing in his dark eyes. He was unmoved. “I’ve heard that story at least ten times this month.”
So what? This time, I wasn’t leaving. I was going to get back everything I’d lost.
One of his men entered. “Boss, Mr. Shaw is here.”
My internal alarms blared. My handler had warned me about this man specifically.
Eddie’s expression hardened. He stood, stepping around me. “Get out.”
I wouldn’t budge. “Not until you agree to take me with you.”
His eyes, black and bottomless, fixed on me. “Are you even legal?”
I nodded.
He glanced away, a humorless smirk on his lips. “Tough luck. I’m not into adults.”
What the—?
The man was a total creep.
Before I could say another word, Mr. Shaw strolled in, his gaze bouncing between me and Eddie with amusement. “Well, well, Eddie. Didn’t know you were into this sort of thing. You should have said something. I’ve got plenty more where she came from.”
In a flash, Eddie had a gun out, the cold barrel pressed against my forehead. His eyes were ice. “Get. Away. From. Me.”
I hovered by the door, trying to listen in.
Suddenly, voices were raised, erupting into a full-blown argument. I burst back into the room right behind Eddie's men.
Mr. Shaw was clutching his forehead, blood streaming between his fingers. He had his own gun leveled at Eddie. “Go to hell!” he screamed.
His finger was tightening on the trigger—
In that split second, I didn’t think. I just moved. Something inside me knew he couldn’t die. Not like this.
I launched myself at him, a blur of motion. As I tackled him to the ground, the gunshot roared in my ears.
My last wisp of consciousness was filled with Eddie’s voice, raw with fury.
“You damn fool!”
If I hadn’t pushed him, that bullet would have gone straight through his head.
Miraculously, I survived. But a piece of me died. My memory was gone.
And the Ava who woke up was… different.
According to witnesses, she was:
A total perv. She’d throw herself at Eddie for kisses at the drop of a hat. She once snuck into the bathroom while he was showering to “measure his dimensions.” And, most bizarrely, she refused to sleep on anything but his chiseled abs.
A social cannonball. Her official title was, essentially, “Eddie’s Overlord.” She would cling to him in public, calling him “hubby” without a shred of shame, using his infatuation with her as a license to stir up trouble wherever she went.
And, on top of all that, she was extremely violent.
She slapped him. Often. When she was feeling particularly inventive, she used… implements.
The basement of the Dillon mansion was a testament to her creativity—a private collection of tools, all for Eddie.

3
I slammed my hand on the table. “That’s a load of crap!”
Barney, the bodyguard Eddie had assigned me, jumped, his body trembling. “M-m-m-ma’am… it’s all true.”
His only real flaw was that debilitating stutter.
The truth was, I had flashes, disjointed images of what I’d been like these past few years. But I couldn’t accept it. I was trying to convince myself it was all just a long, terrible nightmare.
I leaned in, whispering to Barney. “When I hit him… Eddie… he didn’t fight back? Not even once?”
Barney nervously picked at his fingers, his mind replaying the scenes. Every time his boss got slapped, he wouldn't get angry. He'd just get this… wounded puppy look, gently taking her hand and asking if she wanted to go again.
“He… he r-r-re…”
Resisted? No, that couldn’t be right. All ten of my fingers were still attached.
“…really didn’t seem to mind. You’d just hit him harder,” Barney finished in a rush, looking at me with terrified eyes. “The b-boss used to say that only a man with a wife gets the privilege of being hit. He said he felt s-sorry for us because we had no one to hit us.”
I was speechless.
Now that my memories were back, my mission was all I could think about. I had to contact my handler.
When I finally got him on the line, his first message was a single question mark.
You’re not dead? he texted.
Me: Are you trying to curse me? I’ll file a complaint!
Handler: Ooh, did the little baby get her feelings hurt? Don’t make me come over there and take away your rattle.
Me: …Did I do something to you? Why are you being so vicious?
The sarcasm kept flowing. Wouldn’t dream of it. You’re Eddie Dillon’s precious little treasure now. I spent months trying to find you, thought you’d been kidnapped. Then I finally spot you on the street, try to get you out of there, and what happens—
And then it hit me. I remembered.
I remembered everything.
His texts became more frantic. You pointed at me and screamed ‘stranger danger’! You said I was an old, crusty fossil! That I wasn’t fit to lick the mud off your precious Eddie’s shoes!
I was so mad I couldn’t eat for three days!
Me? Crusty? I’m the prize jewel of this entire department!
I was so, so sorry. I apologized profusely.
Eventually, we got down to business. He filled me in. The investigation was closed. Mr. Shaw had been arrested. Eddie Dillon, for his cooperation with the police, had been given a public commendation as a model citizen. They’d dug into every corner of his life and found nothing.
The reason they’d left me with him was simple: during my amnesia, Eddie had guarded me like a dragon hoarding gold. They couldn’t risk spooking him. But more importantly, I hadn’t wanted to leave. I was a clingy, possessive, royal pain in the ass, and they had no idea what to do with me. So, they let it be.
But now, it was up to me to find a tactful way to disappear.
Right before he signed off, my handler added one last gleeful jab. You know, for all your crazy, he seems genuinely into you. Takes a licking and keeps on ticking. If you just up and leave him… well, heh heh…
What the hell was that old fossil ‘heh heh’-ing about?

4
My head was spinning. Just then, a call came in from Eddie’s assistant.
“Ma’am, you haven’t done your daily check-in call yet.”
“Check-in for what?”
He sighed dramatically. “That explains it.” Then his voice turned pleading. “Ma’am, you have to get down here. The boss is about to burn the entire company to the ground.”
On my way!
I didn’t know the way, so I made Barney drive. He started whimpering.
I thought he was just overwhelmed with excitement. I clapped him on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, Barney. From now on, you’re my right-hand man. Do a good job, and you’ll be rewarded.”
“That’s n-not it, ma’am,” he wailed. “It’s just… I’ve f-f-failed my driver’s test… f-five times.”
Useless!
I made him navigate instead. Half an hour later, I was deeply regretting that decision.
We came to an intersection. “Which way, Barney?”
He rolled down the window, sticking his head out so far he nearly fell.
“S-s-str…”
“S-s-str…”
Straight? Got it. I even sped up a little.
Barney’s face turned beet red. “STRAIGHT into a right turn!”
…I was seriously considering just pushing him out of the car.
A little while later, we came to a fork in the road.
Barney pointed excitedly at a bridge. “U-u-up…”
“U-u-up…”
I swerved onto the bridge.
His face crumpled in despair. He slapped his knees, nearly jumping out of his seat. “I’ve been this way before! We were stuck in traffic for a whole day!”
For the love of God.
Thanks to Barney, by the time we reached Eddie’s company, it was already dark.
Eddie’s assistant, Mr. Evans, was a true professional. The security guard told me he’d been waiting by the curb for me since the afternoon.
“So sorry,” I said. “The traffic was a nightmare.”
He offered a cryptic smile. “Don’t worry about it. This is nothing.”
He led the way, walking with a strange, stiff-legged limp.
“Mr. Evans, what happened to your leg?”
Barney, of course, answered for him. “It probably f-f-f-fell asleep!”
Mr. Evans shot him a stern look. “Watch your language in front of Mrs. Dillon.”

5
It wasn’t until we arrived that I realized I had no idea what I was supposed to do here.
Mr. Evans just smiled. “Ma’am, please. Don’t hold back. Do what you do best.”
There was a hidden meaning in his words, and I understood it the moment we reached the CEO’s office.
A woman was draped all over Eddie.
“So she took a bullet for you, so what?” she whined. “I get it, Eddie, you’re grateful. You feel like you owe her. But you’ve done more than enough. Do you have any idea what a joke you’ve become because of her? Do you know what people are saying about you?”
Eddie was slouched in his chair, chin propped on his hand, his attention fixed on the phone sitting on his desk. “What are they saying?” he asked, his tone dripping with boredom.
The woman sniffed. “They’re saying you’re whipped. Spineless. That you let a woman walk all over you, that you have no dignity left.”
Eavesdropping from the hallway, I felt a bead of sweat trickle down my back.
Eddie wasn’t even listening. “Oh.” He shrugged. “They’re just jealous.”
The woman was stunned. Then her eyes welled up with tears. “You treat her like she’s the center of the universe. What about me? What am I to you?”
I recognized her then. Lila. The daughter of one of Eddie’s most loyal men, who had died saving Eddie’s life years ago. Eddie, burdened by that debt, had practically raised Lila like a little sister.
No wonder she was getting away with this. I’d seen what happened to other women who tried to get this close to him. They ended up so terrified they’d cross the street to avoid him.
Eddie didn’t even look up. “You’re thinking too much,” he said flatly. “You’re not in my universe.”
Lila’s face crumpled. “If I had been there that day, I would have taken a bullet for you too! What’s so special about her?”
I flicked a button from my cuff into the room.
“Eek! A cockroach!”
Lila shrieked and leaped behind Eddie. When she realized she’d been had, she pointed a trembling, furious finger at me. “That doesn’t count! You cheated, Ava!”
“Ava.”
Eddie’s eyes lit up. He stood and walked toward me. “You finally came to pick me up.”
Honestly, seeing him still sent a jolt of fear through me. I instinctively took a step back.
He froze, a look of wounded confusion on his face.
Lila wasn’t done. She clung to his arm. “You don’t love him, Ava! You just use him as your personal punching bag. You don’t even give him a shred of dignity. Let’s be real, you’re only with him for his face or his money. You’re a horrible woman!”
Damn it. She wasn’t wrong. I couldn’t even argue.
Eddie’s face turned dangerously cold.
“Get out.”
Alright, fine. I’ll make myself scarce. This actually made things easier. I wouldn’t have to agonize over how to say goodbye.
I turned to leave, but his hand shot out, grabbing my wrist.
“I was talking to her,” he said, his voice a low growl.
Lila’s jaw dropped.
Barney and Mr. Evans, ever the professionals, materialized on either side of her, efficiently escorting her out.
“Hey, I was here first!” Lila protested as they dragged her away. “You can’t just cut in line!”
The heavy office door clicked shut, sealing us in silence.
I had no idea what to do. I was searching for something, anything, to say to break the suffocating tension.
“Honey.”
Hmm?
Eddie moved closer, wrapping his arms around me loosely, as if afraid to hold on too tight. “It’s been too long. I missed you.”
We just saw each other this morning. The left side of his face was still swollen from my handiwork.
I stood perfectly still.
He nuzzled the side of my neck. “Why… why didn’t you hit me today?”
I didn’t answer, focusing all my energy on keeping my hands from shaking.
It was strange. It was like my body had its own memory. The moment Eddie’s face got close, my hands started to itch.
I forced a laugh. “After hearing what Lila said, I did some thinking. Maybe I shouldn’t be trampling all over your dignity like that. I think… I need to break this habit of hitting you.”
Eddie immediately let me go. He took a deep, steadying breath and pulled out his gun.
My own breath hitched. “What are you doing?” I whispered.
He strode past me toward the door, his voice a furious snarl. “I’m going to kill Lila.”

6
Of course, he didn’t get the chance.
In that moment of crisis, I acted. I slapped him. Hard.
The force of it sent a shockwave up my arm.
He wiped a smear of blood from the corner of his mouth, a flicker of excitement in his eyes.
“More,” he whispered. “Baby.”
No. I couldn’t. I wasn’t a sadist.
I held up my throbbing hand. “I can’t. My hand really hurts this time.”
Back at the mansion, Eddie expertly located the first-aid kit. He pulled me onto his lap, his touch gentle as he treated my hand.
“You can use the tools next time,” he murmured, a mixture of pain and self-reproach in his voice.
I couldn’t hold it in any longer. “Eddie, why do you like it so much when I hit you?”
He kept his eyes down, focused on dabbing antiseptic on my knuckles. A small smile played on his lips. “Because it’s you. Anything you do to me… I like it.”
He was a lost cause. That was the only explanation.
But I had to try. “Lila said you’re only like this because I saved you. But there are a million ways to show gratitude. You don’t have to use your body to…”
My voice trailed off. I couldn’t even finish the sentence, the shame was too much.
The next second, he was on his knees between my legs. The movement was so fluid, so practiced, it was clear this wasn’t his first time.
“You’re acting strange today, Ava.”
I couldn’t bring myself to tell him my memory was back. What would he do? For now, I had to play it cool, test the waters.
I came up with a random excuse. “I’m just… getting tired of it.”
“Are you getting tired of me?”
Eddie was tall, and even on his knees, his eyes were level with mine. They were glistening, shimmering with unshed tears. It looked like if I nodded, the floodgates would open.
A wave of guilt washed over me. I felt like I was a heartless player, about to dump a devoted partner after having my fun.
“No, of course not.”
He didn’t believe me. “You are! You’re bored with me!”
I raised my hand as if taking an oath. “I’m not! You’re handsome, you’re rich, you have an incredible body, how could I ever get tired of you?!”
His voice trembled with anger. “Then why haven’t you kissed me all day?!”
I fell silent. What could I possibly say to that?
Eddie’s eyes, wide and teary, fixed on mine. He held out his arms, his voice catching. “Kisses. And hugs.”
He was actually pouting.
My God, what had I done? I had taken a stone-cold killer, a man who wouldn’t blink while ending a life, and trained him into a fragile, clingy crybaby.
I could have had a career as a lion tamer.
I deliberately kept my face a stony mask, refusing to give in. Just like he used to do to me.
And then it happened. A single tear escaped the corner of Eddie’s eye and traced a path down his cheek, like a broken string of pearls.
Poetic. Pathetic.
One minute passed.
Two minutes.
Five minutes later, the silent stream was still flowing.
I gave in.

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