Colleague Tries Skipping Out on the Bill; I’m Not Having It—Called the Cops!

Every time we do a split-the-bill dinner, Valerie always finds a way to skip out. After eating her fill, she either plays dead or suddenly remembers she has something urgent to do. If anyone asks her for her share, she gives them a sideways look.

Everybody ate, so why should I pay more? We all breathed the air, toowhy dont you charge for that?

Because she has connections higher up, most people just swallow their frustration.

Since I was new, I volunteered to organize a company dinner and suggested we split the cost. Val zeroed in on this, ate, and then tried to avoid paying.

Then she pretended to have a seizure to get out of it, thinking Id let it go.

I smiled. She had no idea Im not one to back down.

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What is this? Its terrible. Val grimaced, forcing down another bite.

Its something my mom spent weeks making just so she could send it to me, Megan replied, staring at the empty wrappers in front of Val in shock.

Val made a sound of disdain, spitting out what was left. Didnt you say I could eat it?

Megans face reddened, and her eyes filled with tears. I offered you one to try, not the whole batch. Why would you eat all of it? She couldnt hold back anymore and started crying.

Val raised a brow dismissively. Really? Its just a little food. Ill pay you back next time, and honestly, it wasnt even that good. I cant believe youre cryingpeople will think I bullied you or something.

Just as I set my laptop down, I caught the end of their argument. Curious, I asked the person next to me, Whats going on? Why is she crying so hard?

My colleague rolled her eyes at Val before answering.

Youre new, so you wouldnt know, but Vals always pulling stunts to get free stuff. We all try to steer clear of her. Megans new too; she just moved here from New Mexico. Its a big deal for her to get her favorite hometown snacks. Her mom even went out of her way to make them and send them here. She tried to be nice and let Val try some, and Val went and ate the whole lotand then criticized her moms cooking.

Another colleague, clearly annoyed, joined in. Next time, she says. Val never pays anyone back. If shes not mooching, shes cutting corners.

Megan kept crying as Val yelled over her. Youre crying over a few snacks? Seriously, you look like some bumpkin from nowhere. Couldnt even handle more than three dishes at a real meal.

Megan went silent, shocked into stillness by Vals outburst, her cheeks still wet.

I frownedwas this really okay? I wanted to step in, but then Director Collins called, asking me to bring some paperwork upstairs.

By the time I came back down, theyd all dispersed.

At lunch, a guy mentioned, Im ordering takeout. I have a discount code if anyone wants to join. He tapped my desk and asked politely, Hey, I noticed you havent had lunch yet. Want me to add something for you?

I looked up from my work. Sure, thanks! Just let me know how much, and Ill Venmo you.

He smiled, saying wed figure it out after he used the code.

Val bustled over, her face stretching into a big smile. Jamie, I havent eaten either. Could you order me something?

Jamie didnt respond and just walked away.

Val huffed, Hmph. What a miser.

Someone nearby teased, Val, how many times have you borrowed lunch from Jamie? Have you ever actually paid him back?

Oh, get over it. I carry a Chanel bag. Do you think Id cheat him out of some takeout? Val huffed, returning to her desk before standing up again and calling after Jamie.

Come on, order me one more time. I swear, once I owe you a full thousand, Ill pay you back!

Jamie didnt even look back.

When the food arrived, everyone collected their orders, but one was left unclaimed. Val grabbed it while no one was watching and started eating.

When Jamie came back, he slammed a contract onto her desk. You took my food without asking?

Val chuckled. I noticed it was just sitting there, and I didnt want it to go to waste.

Taking something without permission is stealing. This cost twenty bucks. Venmo me.

Vals eyes widened. What proof do you have that it was yours? Besides, you used a discount codeit probably covered it. You didnt even pay for it yourself, so what right do you have to charge me?

Her twisted logic left Jamie speechless.

Val, do you have no shame? Is it a matter of life or death for you to freeload every day?

Val rolled her eyes, sneering. I wouldnt even care if you died, Jamie. She looked him up and down with disdain. You dont even have two hundred dollars on youdont talk to me; youre bad luck.

Jamie was ready to hit her, but she slammed her hand on the desk. Do you even know who I am? Ive got people in high places.

Val had been hired by the HR Director at the Manhattan Headquarters. Our branch office only had Project Managers, so as long as she didnt mess up her work, no one here could do much about her.

I couldnt take it anymore. So I smiled sweetly. I bet that Chanel bags a knockoff.

Val whipped around. What did you just say?

I shrugged. You cant even fork over twenty dollars. I doubt you can afford real Chanel.

She grabbed her bag and stormed over. Are you blind? Look at the detailsno fake would be this good!

I took a step back. Oh, I get it. Everyone must have chipped in to get it for you.

Shut up! Nobodys that stupid!

I pointed at her half-finished food. Little bits here, little bits thereeventually, they add up, dont they?

Everyone stared at her. Her face turned red.

She threatened, Acting like a hero, huh? Be careful, or you might find yourself unemployed.

I looked at her, deadpan. Youve got spinach in your teeth. And bad breath.

The whole office burst into laughter. Humiliated, Val stomped back to her desk. She plopped down so hard that her leftovers spilled onto her Chanel bag.

She shrieked, rushing to the restroom with her bag.

Jamie came over to thank me, saying it had been ages since anyone had taken Val down a notch.

I offered him my lunch. I havent touched it, and Ill be out soon anyway. Go ahead.

A colleague asked, Arent you worried Val will come after you? I mean, she does have connections.

I threw on my Herms bag. Not my problemIve got money.

She gave a low whistle. Respect.

By Friday, I wanted to get to know everyone better, so I suggested going out for dinner.

Theres a new Japanese place downstairs. I know the owner and can get us a half-off deal. Its on me.

But they insisted that any group dinner was self-pay. They didnt want to take advantage of me.

Fine, but Ill still get them to throw in a few extra dishes, I said.

Jamie raised his hand first. Ive wanted to try that place for ages, but its so expensive. With a discount? Im in!

Everyone else jumped at the chance.

Yeah, we cant miss out on this.

I reserved a private room for ten.

Grace, add me, too! Id love to go! Val said, sidling up to me with a smile.

I hesitated, then looked up at her.

Only if you pay your own share.

Her face tightened, but she forced a smile.

Of course! You think Im the kind of person who wouldnt pay? Ill definitely pay.

I considered it, then agreed. She left, grinning.

Jamie leaned over and whispered, Dont trust her. She always says shell pay but comes up with excuses every timeeither she suddenly gets sick, or she leaves early. She never actually pays.

I raised an eyebrow. So you just let it go?

He gave a resigned nod. She owes me about five hundred in lunch money, but I cant risk my job by confronting her.

I watched Val skip lunch that day to save room for dinner.

Dont worry, I told Jamie with a smile. Ill get your lunch money back.

She had no idea she was up against someone whod been through worse than her cheap tricks.

I handed out the menu for everyone to choose their dishes. Even with the discount, the prices were still high, so everyone discussed their options and chose carefully.

But Val snatched the menu, barely glanced at it, and ordered the most expensive sashimi, lobster, and a bottle of sake.

The others were outraged. What the hell, Val? This isnt your treatwhy are you ordering the priciest stuff?

She even slipped out to order foie gras before replying, Whats your problem? Im paying my shareits split, right? Dont be so cheap.

The others glared as I held up my hand.

Valerie promised shed cover her portion. Everyone, just eat. Ill handle any extras.

When the food came, Val took as much as she could. Before anyone else had a chance, shed already piled most of it on her plate.

Val, could you be a little considerate? Were all supposed to share, and youre taking everything!

She swallowed a red shrimp. What, are your hands broken? I didnt stop you from eating.

Are you kidding me?

Someone slammed the table. You need to leave.

She crossed her legs. Who do you think you are? Grace hasnt said anything. Who are you to tell me what to do?

Dinner became tense.

Next time shes at a company dinner, Im not going, one person muttered under their breath.

As the meal ended, Val clutched her stomach. I need the restroom.

I blocked her. Pay up first.

She glanced around. Do you think Id cheat you out of a few bucks? Im seriousI have a stomachache.

She gestured at her purse on the table. My bags right here. Where would I go?

Then she rushed out. Everyone knew shed run.

Jamie cursed, Im going after her.

I held him back with a smirk. No need. Shes not going anywhere.