Fifty-Fifty Forever: Contract Marriage

A new law introduced the Absolute Equality marriage contract, and the internet exploded.
I proposed to my long-term girlfriend, suggesting we sign up for an AE marriage. No expensive engagement rings, no dowries. We'd split the mortgage and car payments fifty-fifty, take care of our own parents, have two kids—one with my last name, one with hers—and split every single expense after the wedding, right down the middle.
On the day we went to get our marriage license, a frantic man burst into the government office, screaming at the crowd, "Don't do AE! Don't do it! DON'T DO IT!"
I scoffed. "What a simp."
The new era of Absolute Equality marriage was here, and I was going to be a pioneer.

1
I met my girlfriend, Mia, in a college club. She was confident and beautiful, I was outgoing and handsome. The attraction was instant. After a few dates, we naturally fell into a relationship.
On our dates, I'd always offer to pay, but she'd insist on splitting the bill later. I'd try to refuse, but she was so persistent I couldn't say no. I thanked my lucky stars for Mia. Not only was she gorgeous, but she was also kind, considerate, and—best of all—had her head on straight.
Not that I was a slouch, either. I didn't smoke, drink, or gamble. I was a good-looking guy. Mia had scored, too.
My friends, especially my old roommates, were insanely jealous. Their girlfriends were drama magnets, constantly creating problems. Every holiday demanded a gift, and they were always getting angry over nothing. They never offered to pay for anything on dates, always expecting the guy to foot the bill. One of my roommate's girlfriends even demanded a 0-00,000 "engagement gift." It was outrageous. Did these women have any idea what a burden that was? It was like they were selling themselves.
Compared to them, Mia was an angel. She was a firm believer in the new era of AE marriage: no grand gestures, shared mortgage and car payments, separate finances for our parents, a 50/50 split on all living expenses, and two kids, each taking one of our last names.
In a world full of gold-diggers, I had found a real gem. I was determined to marry her.
After graduation, I became a programmer at a tech company, making about $5,000 a month. Mia went to a media company as a content manager, earning around $3,000. Once our careers were stable, we started talking about marriage.
To boost marriage rates and promote stability, the government had introduced a new smart chip. Once surgically implanted in the brain, the chip could monitor a person's emotions and physical state, ensuring absolute equality between spouses. It was linked to our bank accounts and would automatically split all our expenses, which sounded incredibly convenient.
Just as we arrived at the registrar's office, a man burst in, looking completely unhinged, shouting, "Don't do AE! Don't do it! DON'T DO IT!" He was quickly silenced and dragged away by security.
I snorted. "Pathetic." I glanced at Mia, worried he might have rattled her. But thankfully, Mia was a woman of firm convictions. She didn't waver.
The AE marriage chip was free, a government incentive to get people married. It had been out for a few years with a perfect track record. Not a single complaint from any woman.
After signing the papers, we were led to an operating room.
I woke up three days later.
I shook my head, feeling no different with the chip inside. There was a new app on my phone, linked to our genetic codes. We could type or speak to an AI assistant.
We bought a house and a car at the same time, both with loans, with our families each contributing half of the down payment.
Our wedding was simple but heartwarming. Mia was busy with her friends and family, and I felt a little awkward standing alone with my relatives. Usually, the bride and groom greet guests together. But we had agreed to split the wedding costs and keep our own gift money, so it made sense for her to focus on her side.
Seeing her laughing with her loved ones while my own relatives whispered and shot me curious glances made me uncomfortable. I tried to act casual as I walked over to her. Mia gave me a strange look but then smiled and took my arm. To everyone else, we now looked like a normal couple.
After we finished with her family, we naturally moved on to mine. Mia's demeanor changed. Her lively energy was replaced with a quiet elegance. Her smile was reserved, her greetings polite and proper. I was a little annoyed by the sudden shift, but my relatives were full of praise, which made me feel proud, so I let it go.
We agreed to alternate household chores month by month. We drew straws for the first month. Crap. I drew the short one.
I rarely did chores, so I was clumsy at everything. I could never seem to mop the floor clean, and Mia would sometimes frown at the puddles I left behind, though she never criticized me. I didn't know how to cook, and I got home late from work anyway, so we decided to eat out or order in.
After we got married, the AE Butler automatically opened a new joint account and transferred $2,500 from each of our accounts into it, for a total of $5,000. The Butler explained that this money was for shared daily expenses. Every night at midnight, it would calculate the day's spending, split it, and transfer funds from our individual accounts to replenish the joint one, keeping it at a neat $5,000.
The money for takeout came from the Butler account since we were eating together. After ordering our food, I added a pack of cigarettes for myself and a bubble tea for Mia.
Mia paused, then leaned against me, her voice sweet. "Honey, maybe I should drink less bubble tea, and you could smoke less? We need to save up to pay off our loans."
"Of course, of course." Mia earned less than me, so she was under more pressure. I understood.
I did a quick calculation. After my monthly loan payments and living expenses, I still had plenty of money left for myself. I didn't have any expensive hobbies. Besides, after six months at my job, my salary would increase, and I'd get a raise every year as long as I wasn't laid off. Mia's situation was different; her salary was fixed. No wonder she was stressed.
During dinner, Mia was watching an online course. She said she wanted to get a teaching certificate.
"Why are you bothering with that? It's a waste of energy. You might not even get a teaching job, and even if you do, the pay might not be as good as what you're making now." I didn't get it. Studying for a certificate was time-consuming and difficult, with no guaranteed outcome. Why not just relax and play some video games after work instead of wasting time on something so pointless?
Mia pressed her lips together and was silent for a moment before saying firmly, "I'm going to do it."
Fine by me. I didn't push it. I wasn't going to argue with her over something like this. We gave each other plenty of space.
After dinner, I quickly cleared the table. Mia put on her headphones and focused on her lesson while I sat next to her, playing games on my phone. My new colleagues were amazing gamers, and it was a blast ranking up with them.
Later that night, after we'd been intimate, I was drifting off to sleep when my phone buzzed with a notification: Transaction complete: $35.00 deducted.
As a numbers-oriented guy, I was instantly awake. Something was wrong.
Tonight, my meal was 0-00, Mia's was $8. The cigarettes were 0-02, and the bubble tea was $5. The total was $35. A 50/50 split should have been 0-07.50 each!
Mia woke up too. Her phone was on silent, but she picked it up and checked the message. She had only been charged 0-00.00.
"Why was I charged so much more than you?"
"I don't know…" Mia seemed just as confused.
"Even if the cigarettes were just on me, that's still only $23.50. How did it come to $35?" I couldn't figure out the calculation.
I quickly opened the app and asked the AE Butler.
The Butler explained that because I had eaten some of Mia's food, but she hadn't eaten any of mine, I had to pay for a portion of her meal.
!!!
This was ridiculous! We were married! Isn't it normal for a couple to share food? Besides, I didn't stop her from eating mine; she was the one who said it was too greasy!
The Butler replied, "But you are an AE couple."
Whoever designed this chip was an idiot. It wasn't smart at all; it was completely rigid.
Mia, however, seemed to have figured something out. She let out a sigh of relief, lay back down, and went to sleep. I was helpless. The Butler's programming was unchangeable. I just had to remind myself to be more careful in the future.
The next day, I drove to work. Mia's office was in the opposite direction, so she took the subway. I had offered to let her take the car every other week, but she said the subway was a direct line to her office and more convenient than driving. It was fine by me. I had to transfer if I took the subway, so driving was definitely easier.
At the end of the month, it was time to make our loan payments. My share came out to 0-0,478.
I asked the Butler again. What was the reason this time? Was I being charged more for using our shared car more often?
The Butler replied: "The monthly car payment is $576, which is 0-09.20 per day, or $0.80 per hour. On workdays, you use the car for 12 hours, which amounts to $9.60 per day. The remaining 12 hours are split between you and Ms. Shaw, so your daily car payment is 0-04.40. The system detected that you worked 26 days this month. For the four days you did not use the car, your payment is $9.60 per day. Your total car payment for the month is $412.80. Your mortgage payment is 0-0,065.20. Your total loan payment is 0-0,478."
"That's not fair!" I tapped furiously on the screen. "It's our car! She's the one who chooses not to drive it! I only drive it for work!"
The Butler responded, "Ms. Shaw's commuting expenses are also calculated separately."
I understood the logic, but it still felt wrong. If she wanted to take the subway, that was her choice, but the car was ours. She owned half of it. Why was I paying the lion's share?
Sometimes I really wanted to complain about this app, but there was no complaint button. The automatic payments couldn't be canceled unless we got divorced, and I couldn't unlink the chip.
The next month, it was Mia's turn for housework. Her company didn't have overtime, so she got home early and had plenty of time. Mia was meticulous and loved to keep things clean. By the time I got home, the house was always spotless and bright. Dinner was on the table, cooked by Mia herself. She'd been wanting to stop eating takeout for a while.
"Honey, you're amazing! This looks delicious!" I gave Mia a big hug. But her reaction was lukewarm. She seemed a little down. I figured she was just tired.
Women really are naturally talented at cooking. The simple dishes she made were incredible. I ate three huge bowls of rice.
"It would be amazing to eat your cooking every day. It's a waste of your talent not to cook," I said sincerely.
"You think so?" Mia's reply was distracted. She was watching her online course while she ate. Seeing her disengaged, I lost interest and started scrolling through short videos on my phone. After dinner, Mia automatically went to do the dishes. I took a shower, got ready, and settled in for some gaming before bed.
The next morning, when I saw the charge on my phone, I was once again baffled. On the expense list, there was an item for "Labor Fee: 0-00."
I asked the Butler, what labor fee? We hadn't hired anyone. This charge was completely random.
The Butler replied: "As you did not cook a single meal last month, cooking cannot be considered a shared chore within your AE marriage. Ms. Shaw's monthly salary is $3,000. After deductions, her base salary is $2,200 per month, which works out to an average of 0-02.50 per hour. Cooking, grocery shopping, and washing dishes took a total of two hours. Therefore, you must pay Ms. Shaw $25, which is split between you at 0-02.50 each. This amount will be directly deposited into Ms. Shaw's account."
When I saw the grocery bill, which was in the high double-digits, I knew it wasn't that simple. I ate more, so according to the Butler's twisted logic, I was paying the larger share. With the labor fee on top, it would have been cheaper for me to just order takeout.
"Good morning, honey. What do you want for dinner tonight?" Mia had woken up and seemed to be in a great mood.
"Whatever's easy. Don't spend too much time on it. You'll be tired," I said casually as I got up to wash. The sink was sparkling clean.
"Tsk, she really puts in the effort…" I muttered to myself. That spot was hard to clean. I'd never even tried.
Mia cooked every day, a variety of dishes, usually three dishes and a soup, catering to both our tastes. It was a bit more expensive, but her cooking was definitely better than takeout.
At the end of the month, besides the extra car payment, I had another charge of 0-040, also listed as "Labor."
"Didn't we already pay for the cooking every day?" Where did this charge come from?
The Butler replied: "Ms. Shaw spent a total of eight and a half more hours on housework than you did. The hourly rate for a domestic worker in this city is $35 per hour. Therefore, a total of $297.50 should be paid to Ms. Shaw, which is split between you at 0-048.75 each."
?
That's not right!
I typed again: "Why isn't it calculated based on Mia's own hourly wage?"
The Butler: "Housekeeping is not within Ms. Shaw's professional scope of work."

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