Not Blood, Still Forbidden

I lost both my parents at ten and was raised by Payton.

He helped me overcome my mutism and turned down every relationship for my sake. I thought this was love.

On my eighteenth birthday, I gathered the courage to kiss him.

But he pushed me away. I'm your brother. Even though we're not blood-related, what you're doing is disgusting.

Three months ago, he brought home his arranged fiance, Sophia

They held hands. Embraced. Kissed. Right in front of me.

When Sophia had an allergic reaction and was hospitalized, he accused me of poisoning her.

"Go home and kneel. Give the Williams family an explanation."

I knelt in the pouring rain all night.

Later I found out the allergy was her own staged performance, and her fall at the banquet was self-inflicted too.

But what did it matter?

By then, I'd already bought a one-way ticket to the Gobi Desert.

On the night of the birthday banquet, I left him a letter.

"I don't love you anymore."

1.

Lily's POV

"Professor, I've made up my mind. I'm ready to go to the Gobi."

On the other end of the line, the professor's surprise quickly gave way to relief.

"Are you sure? The conditions in the Gobi are extremely harsh."

I gripped my phone, my knuckles turning slightly white.

"I'm sure."

"But your brother has always doted on you. I doubt he'll agree to let you..."

I cut off the professor's words, my voice softening.

"Don't worry, he'll agree."

"Good. Make sure you talk it over with him properly. The departure date is in two weeks."

After hanging up, I looked at the framed photo on my nightstand.

In the photo, seventeen-year-old Payton stood with ten-year-old me on his back at a mountain summit. He turned his face toward me, the mountain wind tousling his hair.

Our two families had been close friends for generations. The year my parents died in a plane crash, the Sterling family took me in. But losing my parents caused me to develop mutism. I didn't speak a single word for three whole months.

The two Sterling elders were busy with official duties and had no extra time to focus on me.

It was Payton who took my hand and said, "You still have me. I'll always be here to take care of you."

And he really did.

He picked me up and dropped me off at school. Always sat in the front row at parent-teacher meetings. Braided my hair, clumsy but gentle. Stayed up all night when I had nightmares.

He even turned down several relationships for my sake, saying, "Lily isn't ready to accept a new family member yet."

Under his gentleness and patience, I finally spoke again. I grew more and more dependent on him, making him my entire world.

But somewhere along the way, that dependence changed its nature.

On the night of my eighteenth birthday, Payton threw me a coming-of-age party that stunned the whole city.

At that party, he, who never touched alcohol, broke his rule and drank.

After the celebration ended, I helped the drunk Payton home.

As he leaned back on the sofa with his eyes closed, I leaned down and gently kissed the corner of his lips.

Payton's eyes flew open. He pushed me away, his eyes filled with disbelief and shock.

"Do you even know what you're doing?"

"I know."

I gathered my courage and confessed my feelings.

"I like you."

"This is absurd!"

It was the first time he'd been this angry with me.

"Everyone knows we're siblings!"

"We're not blood-related. How does that make us siblings?"

"I'm your brother in name!"

"So what?"

"Lily!"

He was livid, as if I'd committed some grave sin.

"I'm seven years older than you! You're only eighteen. What do you know about liking someone?"

I remained stubborn.

"Eighteen is legal adulthood. I'm an adult now, so of course I know what it means to like someone!"

Seeing me counter his every argument, his expression darkened. "Ridiculous!"

That argument ended with Payton slamming the door and leaving.

From then on, Payton's attitude toward me grew increasingly cold.

He came home less and less frequently. For matters concerning me, he no longer handled them personally but sent the butler instead.

But even so, I never gave up.

Every year on his birthday, I carefully prepared gifts and earnestly confessed my feelings to him.

Payton never responded.

I thought that no matter how cold he was or how much he refused to respond, I would keep on liking him.

Until three months ago, when Payton suddenly agreed to an arranged marriage and brought his marriage partner, Sophia, home.

That night at dinner, Sophia sat in what used to be my seat, gently serving Payton food.

I couldn't believe it. I questioned him privately, asking if he'd deliberately agreed to the marriage just to force me to give up my feelings for him.

But Payton said coldly, "You're overthinking it. We're getting married because we're well-matched, and we've reached the age for marriage."

"I've also reached the age for marriage!"

For the first time, my eyes reddened in front of him.

"Payton, why won't you like me?"

"Because you have no idea what real affection is!"

After that, Sophia appeared at the house frequently.

They held hands, embraced, kissed-intimate and affectionate.

It made me feel like all my years of affection were nothing but a laughable case of unrequited love.

Last night at two in the morning, I got up for water. Passing by the study, I heard faint sounds coming from inside.

The door was ajar. I saw Payton and Sophia by the desk, intimately close, with ambiguous sounds spilling out.

I covered my mouth and retreated to my room, sliding down against the door until I sat on the floor. I cried all night.

In that moment, I finally understood-some things, if they're not mine, I can't force them to be.

So I decided to let go of my feelings for him and leave his side.

I'd clung to him for so many years. He must have been fed up with me long ago.

I was about to leave for the Gobi soon. I wouldn't bother him like I used to. He'd probably be relieved when he found out.

2.

Lily's POV

I pulled my suitcase and opened my bedroom door, suddenly hearing the faint sound of a lock turning from the master bedroom across the hall.

My breath caught, and I froze in place.

Payton pushed his door open and stepped out.

He wore a light gray cashmere sweater and casual slacks. His hair was still slightly damp, as if he'd just showered.

The morning light streamed through the floor-to-ceiling window at the end of the hallway, gilding him in a thin golden outline.

For a moment, I felt like I'd returned to the past.

Those mornings when he hadn't yet distanced himself from me-he would always appear like this, fresh and clean, ruffling my hair and asking if I'd slept well.

But the next second, his gaze swept over to me and landed on my suitcase.

"Going somewhere?"

"...Yeah."

I pressed my lips together and looked away.

Payton's brow furrowed slightly.

"Where?"

"Back to campus to stay for a few days."

I didn't mention that I'd be leaving for the Gobi in two weeks. After all, he'd find out once I was gone.

Payton looked me over.

"Why would you suddenly want to go back to campus?"

Because I wanted to make room for Sophia. I didn't want my presence to get in their way.

But before I could answer, Payton stepped forward, grabbed my suitcase from my hand, and ordered, "You're about to start your internship. There's no need to go back to campus. Stay home. You're not moving out."

With that, he domineeringly placed my suitcase back in my bedroom.

He looked almost afraid I might leave.

I froze, but quickly dismissed it as overthinking. How could Payton possibly be afraid of me leaving?

He only forbade me from returning to campus out of habit-treating me like a "little sister."

"Miss Lily, breakfast is ready."

The butler's voice called from downstairs, breaking my daze.

In the dining room, an elegant breakfast was already laid out on the long table.

Payton sat at the head, a financial newspaper spread before him, a cup of black coffee at his side.

He ate gracefully, his movements refined. Even the sound of turning pages was soft.

I sat down diagonally across from him.

"Payton!"

A crisp female voice suddenly rang out from the foyer. My fingers trembled, and my spoon clinked against the bowl.

Sophia walked in with a bright smile, went to Payton's side, and leaned down to kiss his cheek.

"Did I keep you waiting? Traffic was a bit heavy."

Payton set down his newspaper and naturally put his hand on her waist.

"No rush. Have you eaten breakfast yet?"

"Not yet. I wanted to eat with you."

Sophia sat down beside him, and a servant immediately added a set of utensils.

Throughout the whole process, no one glanced at me.

I sat there like a ghost in my own seat, watching their natural, intimate interactions.

Sophia served Payton a piece of bacon. Payton poured her milk. They spoke in low voices, occasionally exchanging smiles.

That intimacy was like fine needles piercing my eyes.

I lowered my head, staring at the porridge in my bowl that had already gone cold. Suddenly, the dining room felt unbearably crowded-so crowded I couldn't breathe.

"By the way, Lily," Sophia suddenly turned toward me, as if just noticing my presence. "We're going skiing today. Do you want to come with us?"

I froze, instinctively shaking my head.

"I..."

"Don't refuse so quickly. You'd be so bored at home alone." Sophia's tone was light. "Payton, let's bring Lily along, okay?"

Payton looked up at me. His gaze was calm and indifferent as he said flatly, "Since Sophia invited you, come along."

One sentence-but it felt like a dull knife slowly cutting open my heart.

He didn't care whether I'd feel awkward. He didn't care whether watching him be intimate with someone else would hurt me.

I didn't want to torture myself, so I tried to decline.

But Sophia came over at that moment and enthusiastically linked her arm through mine.

"Then it's settled! Lily, you won't refuse me, will you?"

3.

Lily's POV

Sophia was too enthusiastic. The refusal on the tip of my tongue never made it out.

In the end, I sat in the passenger seat of the Maybach while Payton and Sophia sat together in the back.

"Payton, do you remember the last time we went skiing? I took such a bad fall, and you laughed at me."

"Yeah, I remember. Later at the hot spring inn, you complained all night about your sore knee."

"Don't tease me about that..."

Listening to their conversation from the back seat, my hands twisted together on my lap, my nails digging into my palms.

So he had all these shared memories with someone else too.

That tenderness, that companionship-they weren't exclusive to me.

Halfway through the drive, Sophia seemed to finally remember there was another person in the car. She suddenly asked with a bright smile, "Lily, do you know how to ski?"

I tensed up and glanced at the rearview mirror. The handsome man in the back seat furrowed his brow slightly, a fleeting emotion passing through his eyes.

I forced a curve to my lips.

"Yes."

"Oh?" Sophia sounded interested. "When did you learn? Did you teach yourself, or did someone teach you?"

I'd known how to ski since I was fifteen. And the person who taught me was sitting right beside Sophia.

But after two seconds of silence, I said, "I learned from an instructor at the ski resort."

At those words, the man in the back seat frowned even more deeply, his expression darkening slightly.

When we arrived at the ski resort, I was putting on my protective gear.

Payton walked up to me, his tall frame bringing an oppressive presence.

"Lily, since when did you learn to lie?"

I looked up.

"What?"

"You learned to ski from a resort instructor?"

His handsome face was clouded with displeasure.

"Why lie?"

I lied only to avoid Sophia misunderstanding anything and affecting their relationship.

But I didn't understand-this was such a trivial matter. Why was Payton so upset about it?

Just as I was about to explain, Sophia's voice called from the other side.

"Payton, come help me. I think there's something wrong with my gear."

Hearing that, Payton warned me coldly, "If you lie again and develop those bad habits, see if I don't punish you."

Then he turned and walked toward Sophia.

I watched his retreating figure. Watched him help Sophia with her gear, checking her equipment.

That gentle, careful, considerate side of him-he used to show it only to me.

I forced myself to stop watching them and found a gentle slope to ski on alone.

"Lily!"

Before long, Sophia skied over to me.

I glanced behind her, but she was alone.

"No need to look. Payton went to get us hot drinks."

Sophia stopped in front of me, removed her ski goggles, and revealed a face with delicate makeup.

"Payton really is something, putting all his attention and energy on me and just leaving you here alone. He's being unreasonable."

I stopped as well and smiled.

"It's fine. You're his fiance. It's only right that he takes extra care of you."

"But watching him treat me well must hurt you, doesn't it?"

Sophia's eyes suddenly carried undisguised scrutiny and provocation.

I frowned slightly.

"I don't understand what you mean."

"Heh."

Sophia let out an extremely soft laugh, one laced with mockery, completely different from her gracious demeanor in front of Payton.

"You understand. You understand better than anyone."

I froze.

"The way you look at him-you can't hide it."

Sophia smiled smugly.

"Too bad it only makes him feel burdened. He told me himself that you're too emotionally complicated, and sometimes he doesn't know how to deal with you."

Emotionally complicated... doesn't know how to deal with...

So when he talked about me to others, that's how he saw me-even as a burden.

"He's just too responsible. Because your families have been friends for generations, and he pitied you for losing your parents, he had no choice but to take care of you all these years."

My fingers curled as I pressed my lips tightly together.

"But it's just responsibility. Lily, do you understand? He takes care of you out of responsibility. Nothing more."

Sophia leaned closer, lowering her voice.

"We're getting married soon. If you're smart, you'll gradually learn to distance yourself from him. Leave yourself some dignity."

I listened quietly, then slowly smiled.

"You're right."

4.

Lily's POV

Sophia froze.

I continued with a smile, "He's taken care of me all these years only out of pity. So you don't need to be threatened by my existence. After all, you're already his fiance."

Sophia was about to say more-

"Watch out! Move!!"

A terrified shout suddenly came from the steep slope in the distance.

A snowboarder who'd clearly lost control was hurtling straight toward us at breakneck speed.

"Lily! Sophia!!"

Payton's panicked shout rang out almost simultaneously.

"Get out of the way!"

Everything happened in a split second.

I had no time to react. Sophia, standing diagonally in front of me, let out a scream of terror.

The next moment, a figure came charging from the side, wrapped in wind and snow spray, at incredible speed.

It was Payton.

He rushed to Sophia's side, extended his arm, pulled her into his embrace, and together they stumbled toward the safety zone.

I stood less than a meter from Sophia, but he didn't spare me even a glance.

Then a massive force slammed into me. A muffled grunt caught in my throat.

Everything spun. I was knocked off the ski run, rolled several times in the snow, tumbled into the forest barrier, and finally hit the back of my head hard against a tree trunk.

In an instant, my vision went black. I lost consciousness.

When I woke up, I was in a hospital room.

The nurse changing my IV bag glanced at me when she heard movement.

"You're awake. How do you feel?"

All I felt was a dull throb in the back of my head and aches throughout my body, like I'd been taken apart.

"You have a mild concussion and multiple contusions. Lucky for you, no fractures. Just lie still and don't move around. You'll need to stay for observation for a couple days."

After giving her instructions, the nurse turned and left the room.

I closed my eyes again to rest, but then I heard the envious voices of nurses outside.

"Mr. Sterling is so good to Miss Williams. She just got a little scared, and he's been by her side the whole time..."

"I heard the Sterling and Williams families are about to have an arranged marriage. Of course he'd be attentive to his fiance, right?"

"But that girl in the next room...I heard she's Mr. Sterling's sister? She's injured so badly, even has a concussion, and he barely even comes to check on her..."

The voices gradually faded.

I sat up, pulled the needle from the back of my hand, and got out of bed.

The dizziness was intense. I leaned against the wall for a while before slowly shuffling out of the room.

The door to the VIP room next door was ajar. Through the crack, I saw Payton sitting by the bed, gently and attentively feeding Sophia fruit.

"Payton," catching sight of me outside the door, Sophia suddenly grabbed his hand, her eyes glistening. "I was so scared today... If you hadn't gotten there in time, I..."

"It's okay."

Payton patted her back, his voice soothing.

"It's over now."

Sophia nestled into his arms, flashing me a victorious smile, then said as if casually, "I heard Lily woke up. Don't you want to go check on her?"

"I hired a caregiver for her. The caregiver will look after her. You were frightened and need rest. I'll stay here with you."

As his words fell, I lowered my lashes.

I didn't go in to disturb them. I turned and walked back to my room, supporting myself against the wall.

Lying back in bed, I pulled the covers over my face.

I remembered when I was fifteen and hospitalized with a high fever. Payton postponed an important international conference and stayed by my bedside for two full days and nights.

Delirious with fever, all I remembered was him wiping my forehead with warm water over and over, coaxing me softly, "I'm here. Don't be afraid."

Back then, his eyes were so gentle-gentle as if he wanted to place the whole world before me.

But now, I was injured and hospitalized right next door, and he didn't even have the time to glance my way.

Maybe this was for the best.

He'd agreed to an arranged marriage now and had a fiance. We should distance ourselves.

My phone vibrated. I picked it up. It was a text from Payton.

You're awake? How do you feel? Do you need anything?

I stared at the message, my finger hovering over the screen.

A few seconds later, I turned off the screen without replying.

5.

Lily's POV

Late at night, the hospital room door was pushed open.

I heard movement through my drowsy haze. When I opened my eyes, Payton's dark silhouette stood by my bed.

He spoke.

"Did I wake you?"

I shook my head and said nothing.

Payton glanced at the gauze wrapped around my forehead, his brow furrowing.

"Does it still hurt?"

"Not too bad."

Silence spread between us.

After a pause, Payton said, "Lily, that situation was so sudden. I saved Sophia because..."

"I understand. You don't need to explain."

I cut him off, lowering my lashes.

"Miss Williams is your fiance. It's only natural that you saved her."

But before, he'd always put me first. Even if it meant getting hurt himself, he'd protect me without a scratch. He couldn't bear to let me get even the slightest injury.

Payton's feelings were unclear.

I said calmly, "Did you come all the way here in the middle of the night just to say this?"

"I remember you're very good at making soup," Payton said slowly, somewhat reluctantly. "You have your own special recipes."

That was because he worked long hours with irregular meals. I was afraid he'd develop stomach problems, so I consulted countless sources and asked several doctors.

After trying countless times, I finally figured out the foods and flavors that suited his taste and were best for his stomach.

"Sophia hasn't had much of an appetite these past couple days. She's not feeling well and wants some soup. She tried yours once before and thought it was quite good, so she asked me to come ask you..."

Before he could finish, my heart sank and my chest tightened painfully.

"I'm injured and still hospitalized, and you want me to make soup for her right now?"

Payton paused, a flash of discomfort crossing his expression. Then he said, "Not you. Just give me the recipe. I'll have someone make it and send it to her."

I stared at him for a long moment, then finally nodded without a word. I found paper and pen, wrote down the recipe, and handed it to him.

Payton opened his mouth.

"Lily..."

"You should go."

I smiled. "Don't keep Miss Williams waiting."

The next morning, when the hospital room door was urgently pushed open again, I was staring out the window in a daze.

Payton strode in, his expression darker than I'd ever seen.

I had a bad feeling.

"What happened?"

"Sophia's in the emergency room!" he said directly, his voice ice-cold. "Full-body allergic rash, difficulty breathing!"

I froze. "How could that happen?"

"That's what I should be asking you!"

Before I could react, Payton threw a crumpled piece of paper at me-the recipe I'd written last night.

"Why was she fine drinking it before, but this time she had a severe allergic reaction?"

Payton stared at me, his gaze sharp as a blade.

"What exactly did you add to this recipe?"

I instinctively protested.

"I didn't add anything. This is the same recipe I always used. I don't know why she had an allergic reaction."

"You don't know?"

Payton's eyes simmered with barely suppressed rage.

"The kitchen followed your recipe exactly. Now she's lying in the emergency room, and the whole household is in chaos! And you think 'I don't know' is enough?"

"If you don't believe me, you can test the recipe..."

"But the Williams family demands an explanation now!"

Payton's face was cold and severe as he said darkly, "They say that at the ski resort, I saved her but not you. They claim you can't tolerate her because of that, so you deliberately tampered with the recipe. They want you to pay the price! Otherwise, this won't end!"

I stiffened, understanding his implication.

"So? How will you give them an explanation? Hand me over to the Williams family, or to the police?"

Payton's jawline tightened. He was silent for several seconds-seconds that felt like an entire century.

"Pack up," he finally spoke.

"Go home and kneel outside the gate."

6.

Lily's POV

Payton actually wanted me to kneel?

Before I could process my shock, two bodyguards in black burst into the hospital room. They grabbed my arms from both sides and roughly dragged me from the bed where I was still receiving an IV.

"What are you doing? Let me go!"

I couldn't believe it.

"Payton, how can you convict me without investigating first?!"

I struggled with all my might, but with my strength, how could I possibly move two burly bodyguards?

In the end, I was forcibly taken out of the hospital, shoved into a car, and escorted home.

Outside the gates of Sterling Manor, Payton stood tall, his expression as still as a frozen lake.

The Sophia's parents stood nearby, their gazes stabbing into me like thorns.

He spoke in a low voice.

"Kneel."

My whole body went cold. "Why should I?"

"Because you're vicious and nearly killed Sophia!"

Sophia's mother shrieked.

"Payton, this is the fine sister you raised!"

Payton's jaw tightened. He shot a look at the bodyguards.

They understood. They pressed down hard on my shoulders.

I fought back with everything I had, only to be restrained even more brutally.

My kneecaps slammed hard into the cold, unforgiving stone pavement. Searing pain exploded through me.

Payton walked up to me, looking down from above.

"Apologize."

I gritted my teeth and looked up at him.

"Payton, I didn't try to harm her!"

Payton's brow furrowed deeply. He turned to the Williams parents.

"You can rest assured. She's here and will kneel until Sophia is confirmed safe. This is the Sterling family's accountability to the Williams family."

Sophia's mother wanted to say something, but Sophia's father pulled her back.

They had originally demanded that Payton hand me over to them, but Payton had said unequivocally that he would personally seek justice for Sophia and absolutely refused to hand me over.

"Payton, Sophia is still lying in the emergency room. I hope you truly mean what you say. Don't go soft halfway through just because she's the sister you raised."

"You can rest assured. I'll have someone watch her here and record everything."

With that, he clapped his hands. Immediately, bodyguards set up a tripod in the distance, aiming a camera lens directly at me.

Only then were the Williams parents satisfied.

Watching the Williams parents and Payton turn and get into their cars and leave, bone-deep coldness swept through my heart.

I tried several times to struggle to my feet, only to be pushed back down mercilessly by the bodyguards standing watch.

"Mr. Sterling said you can't get up until you've knelt long enough!"

Realizing resistance was futile and accepting reality, I stopped struggling.

The rainstorm came without warning.

One second the sky was overcast, the next second massive raindrops came crashing down, instantly turning into a torrential downpour.

Icy rain poured over me, soaking through my thin hospital gown in seconds. My hair and clothes clung to my skin.

Cold.

Bone-piercing cold drilled into me through my knees, crawling up through my bones. I couldn't stop shaking. My teeth chattered uncontrollably.

I vaguely remembered the year I first came to the Sterling house. It had rained like this too.

I was afraid of thunder and hid under my blanket, crying.

It was Payton who pushed open my door, scooped me up blanket and all, gently patted my back, and said, "Lily, don't be afraid. I'm here."

And now, the one making me kneel in the thunderstorm was also him.

I pulled my lips into a faint smile.So this was what true heartbreak felt like.

The sky turned from day to night. I didn't know how long I'd been kneeling, only that my body had grown stiff and numb, like a piece of wood.

My consciousness began to slip away under the assault of cold and pain.

Then darkness came.

Just as I lost consciousness and fell forward, I thought I heard a man's panicked voice.

"Lily."

My body didn't hit the cold stone ground.

Someone caught me.

The man's embrace was scorching hot. It carried a familiar scent. And a barely perceptible...tremble.

How laughable.