Cherish the Years of Yearning

Six years into our secret marriage with Elias Coolidge, we decided on a secret divorce.

To spare his new girlfriend from the ignominy of being called a home-wrecker, he said, I don't want anyone to know we were ever married.

I nodded, said nothing, and simply added an extra zero to the property settlement.

Elias's face changed. "In your heart, is there really nothing but money?"

I chuckled softly. "After all these years, you still know me best."

Elias Coolidge ended up in the hospital after a night of heavy drinking.

The nurse asked, "Who is the patient's family?"

Both I and Sarah Hayes stood up simultaneously.

"I am."

"It's me."

The nurse frowned. "Who is it, really?"

Sarah quickly stepped forward. "It's me. Tell me anything you need to."

The nurse began explaining the instructions for staying overnight. Sarah listened intently.

I glanced at Elias. His breathing was heavy, his brows furrowed, the corners of his eyes flushed red, but his lips were pale and bloodless.

It had been years since I'd seen him like this. Drinking tolerance, while something you could build, was mostly about one's constitution. And Elias, unfortunately, was allergic to alcohol.

Sarah, her eyes welling with tears, warmed his hand. For the 'other woman' to be so dedicated, I, the actual wife, felt quite awkward.

As I hesitated whether to just leave, she spoke. "It's all my fault. If it weren't for me, he wouldn't have drunk so much."

My assistant had already filled me in on the details before I arrived. At the banquet, someone had approached Sarah, trying to get her to drink. Elias had intervened. The man had sneered, "A man who's afraid to drink? You're better off with me."

Elias was long past the age of impulsive bravado. But that night, hed gotten heated and started a drinking contest. Anyone who knew Elias knew he wasn't a strong drinker. But if he was determined to drink himself to death, you probably couldn't outdrink him.

In his wild, reckless youth, he'd landed in the hospital several times for such behavior. The last time was in our second year of marriage. He'd coughed up blood in the hospital, and I'd been in a car crash on the highway. After that, he changed.

Sarah asked, "Ms. Jensen, did he use to protect you like that?"

I forced a smile. "You stay with him; I'll head back."

"Ms. Jensen."

Sarah's voice was urgent. She bit her lip, as if making up her mind. "I told Elias I wanted to get married, and he said yes."

Two days prior, I'd turned my car around and rushed back to the office, having forgotten something important.

Passing Elias's office, the lights were still on. Sarah was sitting sideways on Elias's lap, her arms wrapped around his neck, nestled in his embrace.

She cooed, "Elias, I want to get married."

I didn't have a habit of eavesdropping. But that sentence made me stop in my tracks.

Elias had a casual smile on his face, his eyes slightly narrowed, as he stroked Sarah's long hair over and over again.

"What, little lady in a hurry to get hitched?"

"No way!"

Sarah hummed. "I just want to marry you. Elias, will you marry me, please?"

I stood outside the door, watching Elias through the half-open crack.

He was silent for a long time. The smile faded from his face. He met my gaze steadily.

Then he softly said, "Okay."

"Ms. Jensen, Elias doesn't love you anymore. He loves me now."

Sarah's voice was full of conviction. She looked at me, nervous and proud.

I lowered my eyes. "Then congratulations."

Elias returned to the office the next afternoon.

As soon as he entered his office, he called for me. Pushing open the door, I saw him propping his head wearily, pressing his thumb hard against his temple. The after-effects of a hangover, a migraine, had set in.

"Organize the 'Bright Horizons' project and hand it over to Sarah."

His sudden instruction left me stunned for a few seconds. "What?"

He didn't repeat himself, just looked at me with heavy eyes.

"The Bright Horizons project is crucial. Sarah is just starting out So she needs an opportunity, a big win, a glittering resume."

I fell silent again.

"Cara Jensen, I'm not discussing this with you." Elias rapped his knuckles sharply on the table. He was clearly impatient.

Taking a deep breath, my clenched fists relaxed. "Alright. But I have one condition."

Elias raised his chin, signaling me to speak. "Keep the original team, just make her the head. The bonuses and dividends for the project members, not a cent less."

"Fine, I agree."

After receiving Elias's affirmative answer, I turned and left.

I spent an hour and a half organizing everything and explaining the situation to the team. Their gazes at me held pity, sympathy, indignation, and anger.

I tapped on the table. "Don't get emotional; don't talk about loyalty. It's just work. Get it done, get paid."

Carrying the documents, I re-entered Elias's office. Sarah was there too, smiling as she fed Elias a cookie.

Elias disliked all sweets. Though he frowned, he reluctantly accepted it.

Seeing me, Sarah quickly stood up straight. "You two have business, I'll step out."

"No need." Elias placed the cookie box in Sarah's hand. "Eat over there."

Then he looked at me, his tone unfriendly. "Next time, remember to knock."

Had I not knocked? I guess I hadn't. It was habit.

"There won't be a next time."

"What?"

I placed all the files on Elias's desk. Meeting his questioning gaze, I handed him the bottom A4 sheet of paper.

It clearly stated: Resignation Letter.

Elias paused for two seconds. When he looked up again, his eyes were cold.

"What do you mean? Are you threatening me?"

I hesitated. "You're overthinking it. The resignation letter has been ready for a while, just waiting for the Bright Horizons project to end. Now that I've handed it over, all my tasks are complete. It's the perfect time to resign."

Elias stared at me, his face grim. Sarah seemed scared.

"Ms. Jensen, I won't do this project. Please don't be angry. I know I'm not qualified. I just wanted to learn from you. I won't participate. It's my fault, I apologize."

Elias's expression turned even darker. He grabbed Sarah. "You do it if you want to. You don't need to apologize to anyone. Resigning, are you? Do you think the company won't run without you?"

Elias picked up a pen and scrawled his name at the bottom. He threw the resignation letter at me. "Get out."

I looked down at the paper lying at my feet. "One more thing."

Elias's face was taut, silent.

"Since you and Sarah are getting married, shouldn't we first end our marriage?"

Even Sarah's sobs stopped. She gripped Elias's arm, looking at him with a mix of nervousness and anticipation.

Elias's frame stiffened slightly. He slowly turned his head.

"What did you say?"

"I said, let's get a divorce while we're at it!"

Sarah was dismissed by Elias. She was somewhat reluctant but didn't defy him, only casting me a hesitant glance as she left.

Elias and I stood facing each other. He broke the silence first.

"How long have you been planning this resignation?"

"Six months."

"So you were ready to divorce six months ago, right?"

I neither confirmed nor denied.

Elias scoffed. "Cara Jensen, what right do you have to ask for a divorce?"

I looked at him. "Does it matter now?"

"No, it doesn't." Elias took a divorce agreement from his bottom drawer. "You can name any terms you want. Just one thing: I don't want anyone to gossip about Sarah being the other woman. So no one can know about our divorce. Or rather, I don't want anyone to know we were ever married."

I scanned the agreement's contents quickly. I nodded. "Okay, no problem."

Then I picked up the pen and added an extra zero to the property division.

Elias looked at me with a sarcastic gaze. "Cara Jensen, in your heart, is there really nothing but money?"

I curled my lips. "After all these years, you still know me best."

That day, I packed all my belongings and left the company.

Some people were gleeful, others genuinely sad to see me go. The most complex emotions, however, must have belonged to Sarah. She looked like she wanted to say something, but the relief on her face was clear for all to see.

Back home, suddenly without work, I felt a little out of place. I spent the whole day like a cat with its tail cut off, unsure what to do with myself.

In the afternoon, my assistant sent me a message.

[Mr. Coolidge was like a fire-breathing dragon today. Even the future boss lady got a dressing down. Ms. Jensen, I believe it won't be long before he realizes hes cut off his own artery. If you find a good new place, take us with you, please! We'd all love to follow you, hehe.]

I curved my lips.

[Don't overthink it. As long as the Bright Horizons project is secured, the company still has a promising future. At least your salaries won't suffer.]

As for meI had no plans to work in the short term.

In the evening, Olivia called me to go out for drinks. Like clockwork, she asked daily.

I replied: [Send me the location.]

The next second, her call came in.

"Well, I'll be damned. The workaholic is taking a break? What, did Elias go bankrupt?"

Hearing her vibrant voice, a smile touched my lips. "So, are you going to let me come or not?"

"Come on, hurry up! Private room, drinks, menwe've got everything!"

I met Olivia through Elias, but we unexpectedly became friends. She was one of the few people who knew Elias and I were married. So, facing Eliass blatant infidelity, she resented him fiercely on one hand and dedicated herself to setting me up with men on the other. In her words, "If he pulls a stunt, don't blame you for pulling an even bigger one. Who knows whose market value is better!"

By the time I arrived, Olivia was already high-spirited. She held a wine glass, screaming and dancing, surrounded by a group of six-foot-tall male models.

"Cara, come here." She pushed the most handsome one towards me.

The guy was smooth, calling me "sis" while pouring me a drink. I smiled faintly and took a sip.

"Alright, you guys can head out now!"

"No, what do you mean?! Cara, you're such a buzzkill."

I rubbed my temples, helplessly. "Too loud."

She winked at me. "I thought you were shy!"

I raised an eyebrow. "Am I that innocent in your eyes?"

"Not at all. So I don't get it. Elias is like that, why are you being so faithful to him?" Olivia was bluntly exasperating.

"If he cheats, I cheat. That's revenge."

"Revenge is too strong a word; we're not at that point. Besides, his cheating happened after our breakup."

"Does he acknowledge it?"

Olivia sat up straight, her eyes gleaming. "I think I've found a crucial point."

I asked Olivia what she meant, but she wouldn't say, just acting cryptic.

"Alright! Actually, I mainly came to tell you that I'm going abroad soon."

"What, for vacation? Business?"

"School."

"Huh?"

"I got accepted into business school; I'm going for my master's."

"What about your job? And you and Elias"

"I've already resigned. As for Elias and me, we've arranged to go to the courthouse tomorrow."

It was almost inevitable that Elias and I would reach this point. I always felt I didn't have much emotion about it. Yet, when Olivia's eyes turned red, a bitterness still welled up in my heart.

"Is he being a jerk again?"

"No."

"Is he intentionally targeting you?"

"No."

"Why did you resign? If anyone should go, it should be him!"

Olivia and I drank glass after glass. She railed against Elias, empathizing with my pain and feeling I deserved better.

Perhaps love is the only thing in this world where input and reward are disproportionate. Its strange; two people who once loved each other end up feeling shortchanged.

Elias and I met in high school. He shouldn't have been in our small town, but due to family circumstances, he had to transfer to live with his grandfather.

Back then, he was willful and rebellious. Not long after school started, he was among the first to be publicly reprimanded. Others, at least, were humble when admitting their mistakes. But he, even standing before the entire school, remained insolent.

I disliked people like that. And I didn't want any interaction with them. Yet, when he was falsely accused, I couldn't help but step forward and testify for him.

From that day on, he followed me, from school to my house, staying until I went upstairs.

"Without me, you would have been retaliated against by now."

"Good student, stay out of such matters in the future."

He didn't care. Fights, false accusations, misunderstandings, punishments C he didn't care about any of it. But when my dad's fist, having just struck my mom, was about to land on me, he rushed forward and knocked him down with a kick.

My mom screamed, helped my dad up, glared at me, and called me a slut.

Elias froze. The next second, he grabbed me and ran.

He cooked me a bowl of noodles. It had cooked too long and was clumpy. Too much soy sauce, a bit too salty. The greens were added too late, completely raw.

It was the worst bowl of noodles I'd ever tasted, yet I ate every last drop, even the broth.

In our turbulent youth, two lonely souls, we found warmth in each other, supporting each other as we moved forward.

But everyone was against us.

The school opposed early romance. Elias's family was condescending. "I've seen plenty of gold-diggers, but this young is a first."

My moms eyes turned red with anger. She slapped me, calling me a disgrace.

Elias was forcibly taken away, and I became an outcast at school. But he escaped, with all his New Year's money, and a bruised leg.

He said, "Let's elope!"

I held him, resting my head against his. "One year. We'll get into the same university. Then no one can stop us. Just one year."