Eating The Lies She Fed Me

My mother always called me her favorite girl, her little sweetheart. She loved to tell everyone that my brother, Jace, wasn't half as thoughtful as I was.

Friends and relatives repeated the sentiment: My mom, Shelly, loved me the most.

It was because of my severe childhood allergy to all red meat and seafood proteins. She was tireless, theyd say, constantly making special meals just for me. Shed spend hours online researching recipes for safe, nutritious snacks, terrified that Id feel deprived.

The problem was, Mom was a terrible cook. Everything she made was dry, overcooked, and bland.

My father, Gary, worked construction contracts out of state most of the year, leaving Mom to handle Jace and me. If I ever complained to him, hed just tell me, Your mother is working so hard taking care of both of you. You need to be more understanding.

So, I endured. I always had.

Then came my eighteenth birthday.

My mother presented the cake shed made herself.

It wasn't made with cream or flour.

It was constructed from cubes of stale bread.

Staring at that lopsided, garishly-colored mockery of a dessert, I finally broke.

I lifted the corner of the dining table and sent everything crashing to the floor.

I just wanted a damn cake! Was that too much to ask?

The room erupted. My relatives instantly condemned me as an ungrateful brat. My father, his face purple with fury, slapped me.

My mother just stood there, tears streaming down her face, insisting it was all her fault, that she was only worried about my allergies

As the accusations rained down, something snapped. In a blind rage, I grabbed a handful of the leftover beef steak and shrimp from the overturned table and shoved it into my mouth.

Everyone froze.

The moment my mother triumphantly carried out the cake, my body went rigid.

It wasn't a cake.

It was cubes of dry, day-old bread, patched together with sickeningly bright, chemical-tasting frosting. It looked lumpy and grotesque.

My mother was beaming, trying to sell the lie.

You know you have such a sensitive system, Maya, you cant have dairy. This is special, just for you.

She nudged it closer. Don't look at it, taste it. Its actually very good!

I just stared at it, unable to move.

My Aunt Elise nudged my arm, her expression tight.

Your mother is talking to you. Think about it, Maya. Youre allergic to everything. Only your mother has the patience to prepare separate meals for you all these years, and now a special birthday cake. See how much she loves you?

Moms smile grew wider.

Its what I should do. Maya is my little sweetheart. Who else would I spoil?

She pushed the foul centerpiece toward me again. The sugary stench, mixed with the stale, yeasty smell of the bread, hit me.

I couldn't take it anymore. I shot my hand out and slammed it against the plate.

The bread structure hit the floor with a dull thud.

After all these years, all I wanted was one normal birthday cake! Was it really that difficult?

The sudden silence in the room was deafening. Every smile froze.

My mothers eyes instantly welled up.

Maya, I didn't mean I was just so worried about your allergies

Aunt Elise stepped in quickly.

Maya, your mother is trying her best. You cant speak to her like that.

I dug my nails into my palms. If you didn't want to buy me one, I could have bought my own! Im a legal adult! Im not spending your money!

I fought back tears of frustration. This is my eighteenth birthday. I just wanted a good memory! Just stop pretending to be a good person, okay?

The relatives turned on me, their faces sour.

That little girl is so ungrateful!

Youve been allergic to every protein since birth! Your mother had to nurse you like this, or you would have starved!

Shes a spoiled brat. And to be so cruel on your birthday? A total shame.

Honestly, daughters are just a burden. A son is the only one who takes care of you in the end.

My father, Gary, who had taken unpaid leave to be here, looked mortified. He glared at me.

Maya! How dare you talk to your mother that way! Shes been running herself ragged, she bought you new clothes, a new phone! Apologize. Now!

Mom was weeping silently by the counter.

My heart twisted. I snatched the cheap, plastic phone he mentionedthe basic brick phoneand hurled it to the floor.

Who wants this junk?!

Im in college now! Why would you buy me a prepaid burner phone?

Everyone paused at the sight of the cheap device. It was the kind of basic model youd only find in a forgotten corner of a convenience store.

But someone always defends Shelly.

Aunt Elise shot me a look. Whats wrong with a simple phone? Its for calling and emergencies, isn't it?

Exactly! a cousin chimed in. We never had anything like this when we were young!

Mom quickly scooped up the phone, wiping it clean with a desperate tenderness. She pulled Elise closer, then looked at me with a lost, helpless expression.

Maya, Im so sorry Your father works so hard, and expenses are high. We don't have the money Its my fault. Ill apologize. Next time, when I save up a little more, Ill buy you a better one. I promise.

Looking into her swollen, red eyes made my chest tighten with a suffocating, familiar rage. My voice came out in a desperate, sharp squeak.

Buy it now, or stop with the performance!

Mom flinched, her hands shaking. I I don't have any cash right now

I leaned in, aggressive.

Didn't Dad deposit thirty thousand dollars into your account when he got back? Where is the money?

Her gaze flickered away. There are so many things the family needs. You dont manage a household, you don't understand the costs Besides, its snowing outside, its cold. Maya, why dont you wait? Ill go later, okay?

Elise gave me a hard stare. Its just a phone. When does it have to be bought? You havent always been like this, Maya. Why are you acting so materialistic?

The relatives chimed in with fresh condemnations.

Mom wiped her tears and tried to play the peacemaker.

Its okay, its okay. Maya is just stressed. Don't scold her.

She reached into her coat pocket and pulled out a small bag of candy.

Here. I specifically bought you some chocolate. Have something sweet to tide you over, dont starve yourself.

Dad and Aunt Elise stared at me, daring me to protest.

Look how good your mother is to you!

I felt the bag in my hand. It was soft and stickythe cheap, pre-packaged chocolate had completely melted.

My eyes burned with fresh anger. I threw the sticky bag down.

Who needs your cheap pity?

If you truly loved me, youd go out and buy me the newest phone and the best cake! If you can't, then stop talking!

You spoiled little brat!

Dads face went green.

Your mother bought you a treat because she knows you like sweets, and this is how you act?

She cant buy me a cake or a phone, but she shoves this cheap candy at me and tries to look like a saint? Go buy a decent cake and a decent phone!

I jutted out my chin and slammed my fist on the counter.

My mother began to sob harder.

Elise hurried over to comfort her, then looked at me with deep disappointment. Maya, youre becoming unrecognizable. How can you treat your mother like this? Your father is never home, she raised you, she sacrificed everything. Forget about repaying hercan't you even acknowledge her efforts? Over a phone and a cake? Is it really worth it?

Dads face was steel. Dont bother reasoning with her!

Shes spoiled rotten! Im going to teach her a lesson right now!

He raised his hand.

No, stop! Dont hit her! Its her birthday!

My mother threw herself against him, hugging his waist. She looked at me, pleading.

Maya, please, dont be upset. I promise Ill buy it later.

We have so many relatives here. Lets not talk about this now. I made all your favorite dishes. You love fish, remember? I bought a huge salmon and stewed it. Let me go get it

She rushed into the kitchen and returned with a platter of fish. It looked well-prepared.

She forced a smile. Maya, come try this.

She tugged Dads arm, gesturing for everyone to sit down.

I fixated on the fish.

She used chopsticks to gently place a piece of meat into my plate.

The sight of it made every hair on my body stand on end.

I grabbed the entire plate and dumped it into the garbage can.

A piece of fish, and you act like its a lifetime of devotion! Stop the performance!

My father finally lost control. He lunged across the table and struck me across the face.

You ungrateful viper! I should just kill you!

The relatives joined the chorus of outrage.

Her mother is so good to her! She doesnt know how lucky she is!

This kind of child will never be loyal. A complete waste of effort!

Honestly, why even pay for her college? Shes useless!

I covered my burning cheek, the verbal abuse washing over me.

Look at you! What kind of person are you? Im going to discipline you properly!

Dad was volcanic. He ripped off his belt and coiled it.

My mother rushed back, hugging his waist tightly. No, no, please, not today! Its Mayas birthday. Everything is my fault, not hers!

Dad was beside himself with impotent rage. Look at you! You're still protecting her! Does this viper care about you at all?

Elise pulled Mom back, agreeing with Dad for the first time. Hes right, Shelly! You indulge her too much! She needs a lesson!

Mom looked at me with a pained expression, tears streaming, but still defended me.

Maya is still young. When shes older, shell understand

Dad and Elise glared, shaking their heads. The relatives sighed.

Look how much your mother loves you

Shes still defending you now. Don't you feel any shame?

Mom sniffled, forcing a breezy lightness.

Its fine, its fine. Everyone stop talking about Maya. Ill get another cake and another dish.

She bent down to pick up the scattered bread pieces.

I couldn't stand it. I ran forward and kicked the mess of bread aside.

I dont want your fake goodness!

The room went completely silent.

Dad froze for three seconds, then snapped back to reality. The belt lashed out, catching my forearm.

A searing, hot pain.

You wicked girl! Who do you think your mother does all this for?

He was beyond reason, whipping the belt down again and again. Mom tried to stop him but was held back by Elise. She just covered her face and sobbed.

Soon, a stinging line of blood appeared on my face.

I cried out, touching my cheek. My fingertips came away slick.

The sight of the blood on my face startled Dad. He paused.

I let out a harsh, cold laugh, pushed past him, and kicked over the dining table again, harder this time.

You abandoned me my whole life! What right do you have to hit me?

Seeing my hysteria, Dads chest heaved. He spat the words out.

Youre crazy! A total lunatic!

I knew you were an ungrateful brat! All these years wasted raising you!

If youre so unhappy with us, fine! Well disown you! I cant live with this shame, but I can certainly get rid of you!

The relatives, seeing the situation spiral, rushed to mediate. Elise insisted I apologize.

I stood completely still. I stared at my father for a long moment.

Then, my voice hoarse, I spoke.

Fine. Lets do it. Disown me.

Dad had only meant to scare me. My immediate acceptance stunned him.

Mom rushed to intervene. No, Maya, your dad just said that in the heat of the moment. Please don't

Don't speak!

I cut her off, refusing to look at her red eyes.

I spoke slowly, deliberately.

Whether he means it or not is irrelevant. I mean it.

Dad felt cornered. He was shaking with rage.

Fine! Fine! You want to be disowned? Ill sign the papers!

He yelled for my brother. Jace, who had been pretending to hide in his room, came out, shot me a gleeful, spiteful look, and ran out to print the document.

He returned quickly, triumphantly handing the paper to Dad.

Dad grabbed a pen and signed with a flourish.

From today forward, you are no longer my daughter! You will never see a dime of my money! We won't pay another cent of your college tuition!

You hate us so much? Sign this and get out of my house!

The relatives tried to calm us both down. Elise held my hand, pleading for me to say something soft.

Come on, Maya, don't be dramatic! Youre an adult now, you need to be sensible!

Life is hard; your mom is under so much pressure. Apologize to her, and your dad will calm down!

I stayed silent. I pulled my hand from hers, picked up the pen, and signed the document decisively.

Mom wailed, Maya, dont be rash! Dont do this!

But my pen didn't stop. Beside my fathers name, I cleanly, forcefully wrote my own.

I was done with this house.

Seeing my signature, Moms sobs grew louder, filled with guilt and self-reproach. She even slapped herself across the face.

Its all my fault! I shouldnt have made that cake

Dad and Elise watched, their faces grim.

I just smiled.

Yes, it is your fault.

Dads eyes flashed with fresh anger, and he lunged.

I pushed him away and ran into the kitchen. I grabbed the rest of the cooked beef and shrimp, the forbidden food Mom had prepared.

In front of the horrified crowd, I began to shove the meat into my mouth.

Everyone was shocked.

Elise reacted first, trying to pull me away.

Maya, are you insane?! Youre allergic! This could kill you!

I shoved her back, staring hard at my mother, chewing mouthful after mouthful.

With every bite I took, my mothers face went a shade whiter.

The relatives were terrified. Someone was yelling for an ambulance. My father stood paralyzed.

In just a few minutes, I finished the entire plate of beef and seafood.

The paramedics rushed in. The doctor, hurried and worried, asked who had the allergic reaction.

All eyes turned to me.