The Real Husband Was Only A Guest

Starting the second year of our marriage, Kendall and I had an arrangement: we would spend the holidays with our respective families.

This year, my dad was supposedly vacationing in South Beach.

I kept it a secret from Kendall, flying two thousand miles on Christmas Eve, ready to give her the surprise of a lifetime.

I had barely stepped out of the cab when a text from Kendall popped up:

"Honey, dinner is so dull without you here. Missing my guy."

Warmth flooded my chest. I took a deep breath of the freezing air and excitedly knocked on the door of the small house in Rosewood, Tennessee.

The moment Kendall saw me, the color drained from her face, leaving her ghost-pale. She instantly tried to slam the door shut.

"Kai! W-what are you doing here?!"

I put my hand up to stop the door. From inside, her mothers voice called out: "Honey, who's at the door?"

Kendall shoved against the door, her voice a thin, panicked whisper:

"Mom, it's nothing! Just a colleague dropping off a last-minute office gift basket!"

"Sweetheart, which colleague is it?"

A familiar male voice cut in.

"It's freezing out there! Don't leave them standing in the snow, let them in."

It was Blake Harrison.

Kendalls assistant.

And he was wearing the apronthe one Id bought for her mother.

The sub-zero December wind was nothing compared to the ice forming in my chest. Nothing.

"Colleague?" I stared at Kendall, my voice dangerously low.

"Im what kind of colleague to you?"

A sheen of sweat broke out on Kendalls forehead. She pressed her face close to mine, her voice a desperate plea:

"Kai, Ill explain everything later. My moms heart she cant handle a shock. Please, Im begging you, justdont make a scene."

Dont make a scene? A sick joke. I traveled across the country to surprise my wife, to spend the holiday with my in-laws, and she was begging me not to make a scene? The word tasted like ash.

Before I could reply, the door was pulled open from the inside.

Blake, still wearing the apron and holding a spatula like some kind of domestic prince, smiled. His face froze for a fraction of a second when he saw me, but the warmth returned instantly.

"Well, look who it is! Kai, man! What a surprise!"

"Why are you two still blocking the door?" Mrs. Wells called from the living room. "Come in, it's blowing a blizzard out there!"

Kendall gave me a frantic, tearful look, mouthing the words: Please. Ill explain.

I swallowed the metallic taste of betrayal, nodded once, and stepped into the house, into the warmth and the noise, carrying the heavy bag of gifts I'd brought.

The living room was cozy. The TV was running a holiday special, and the coffee table was covered in nuts and holiday treats.

Mr. Wells was on the sofa, peeling an orange. He looked up.

"Well, now, Kendall, your colleague is a sharp-looking young man. Come in, come in, don't be shy."

Mrs. Wells smiled, taking the gifts from my hand.

"Out delivering presents on a holiday? Thats dedication. Thank you, dear."

Neither of them, warm and smiling, recognized the man who was actually their son-in-law.

Our wedding five years ago was quiet, without a proper reception. Id only come here once, that first year. After that, Kendall insisted we spend the holidays separately. The Wells didnt use social media, and our contact was limited to brief, pleasant phone calls.

I opened my mouth to speak.

Kendall cut me off immediately:

"Mom, this is Kai. He just happened to be passing through Rosewood. He can only stay a minute, hes got to catch a train."

"Kai?" Mrs. Wells repeated the name, her brow furrowing, as if it sounded vaguely familiar.

Blake smoothly intercepted the moment.

"Mrs. Wells, Kais a mover-and-shaker. Hes probably on a business trip, had to stop by."

Blake laughed, setting a plate of sliced apples in front of me. "Kai, man, try these. Kendall and I picked them out at the market a few days ago. Super sweet."

I remembered a phone call from a few days ago, when Kendall had sighed, "Honey, I wish you were here to peel an apple for me. Nobody does it like you do."

"Blake, stop fussing, come sit down." Mrs. Wells affectionately waved him over, her tone intimate. "You're too good to us, son. Working so hard and still finding time to bring us all these nice things. You haven't rested since you got here."

Mr. Wells handed the peeled orange to Blake.

"Blake, show me how to use that foot spa you bought me again later."

My head snapped up.

The foot spa. I remembered researching it for weeks, comparing every high-end model because of Mr. Wells's bad circulation. It cost a fortuneover three thousand dollarsand I told Kendall specifically to show them how to use it.

How did it become Blakes?

The cherries and the gourmet nuts on the table were things Id shipped weeks ago. The massage chair in the corner? That was my Black Friday splurge.

My love, my care, my every thoughtful gestureall rebranded. All signed by Blake Harrison.

The snow fell heavier, making travel impossible. I wasnt going anywhere.

"So, where are you staying, Kai?" Mrs. Wells asked.

Kendall reflexively glanced toward the master bedroom.

Mr. Wells filled the silence. "The den has a fold-out couch, Martha. Its a little messy, but with a thick blanket, hell be fine for one night."

"Oh, thats terrible," Mrs. Wells said, looking pained. "Blake, maybe you can double up with him?"

"Mom, Im not really comfortable sharing a bed with a stranger." Blake turned to me, his smile fixed. "Sorry, Kai, youre stuck with the couch."

"Fine," I heard myself say, the word tasting like sand.

The lumpy, fold-out couch in the cluttered den was rock-hard. The threadbare quilt smelled of dust and attic.

We had promised to alternate holidays. The second year, Kendall claimed her mother was sick. The third, she said Id be too cold in the South and that my own dad needed me. Last year, the same excuse.

This was the fifth year.

The years of "you're too busy" and "you'll be cold" werent about consideration. They were about keeping the stage clear for him. Blake wasn't a temporary stunt; he was the understudy who took the starring role.

My phone vibrated. A text from my dad:

Son, did you make it? Did Kendall love the surprise? Give the Wells my love.

Staring at my father's earnest, trusting words, the dam broke. I pressed my face into the musty quilt and finally let the tears come.

Later that night, I went out for a glass of water.

The master bedroom door was ajar.

The sheets, the ones I'd splurged on from a luxury linen store in NYC, the ones Kendall said were "too nice" for her parentsthey were draped over their bed.

Blake was holding a tablet, their heads bent close together, sharing a laugh so easy, so intimate, it felt like a punch to the stomach. They looked like a couple planning their future.

I barely made it to the bathroom, collapsing onto my knees. I dry-heaved over the porcelain bowl, trying to vomit up the sickening image, the years of lies. I needed out. I couldn't look at them for one more second.

Perhaps it was the cold, or the raw, white-hot fire of my fury, but I had developed a fever.

In my hazy dreams, I was back five years ago. Kendall was broke and starting her company. Id hold her frozen feet in my lap in our tiny, unheated apartment in New York.

"Kai," shed promised, "when we make it big, well buy a place with heated floors. Well never be cold again."

The scene shifted. She was kneeling in the snow, a tiny diamond chip ring in her hand. "Kai, lets build a home. Youll never have to feel like an outsider again."

She had loved me, hadn't she?

So where had this woman come from?

"Water... water..." I mumbled, waking up.

A cool washcloth was on my forehead.

In the dim light of the headlamp, Kendall was leaning over me, her face etched with worry.

"Kai? You're awake? Oh God, you're burning up." Her voice was soft, laced with genuine fear.

Seeing her distressed face, I almost believed we were back in our apartment, safe and real.

"Kendall..." I whispered, the exhaustion making my voice shake. Tears streamed down my temples. "I need to go home."

"I know, I know. Just as soon as your fever breaks, well go home." She gently patted my back.

The fleeting moment of tenderness almost drowned me in the illusion of our past. But the events of the night snapped me back.

"Why did your parents think Blake was their son-in-law?" I demanded.

"Kai, you have every right to be angry," she said, her voice dropping. "But I swear, there's nothing going on with Blake."

"My parents have been pressuring me for years to bring you home for the holidays. You know how small Rosewood isthe gossip, the shame. I told you I just needed a stand-in, a temporary fianc, to shut them up."

"I didn't want to come back?!" I was shaking with fury. "I booked a ticket for today! You told me this place was 'too remote' and 'too cold' for a 'city guy' like me!"

"Yes, yes, youre right, its all my fault." Kendall quickly conceded.

"Blakes a committed bachelorthis was strictly business, a performance for the family. We're totally platonic. We have never done anything that would betray our vows."

"An act that requires you to sleep in the same room? An act where he claims credit for my damn Christmas gifts?"

"We didn't sleep together! We slept separately! I swear! And the gifts that was a misunderstanding. I didnt want them to get the wrong impression of you, so I just let them think he bought them..."

"After the New Year, Ill tell them the truth."

Kendall knelt on the floor beside the couch, wrapping her arms around my waist.

"Can you just hold it together for a couple more days? Just until after the New Year? For my mother's sakeyou know her heart."

Her eyes were wide, pleading.

She knew. She knew I grew up in a single-parent home and envied the warmth of a full family. She knew I couldnt stand to see an elderly person suffer, and I couldn't resist the phrase "for the sake of the family."

A sudden, sharp gasp came from the doorway.

"What in Gods name are you doing?!"

Mrs. Wells was standing there, her face a mask of rage.

"Mom, I" Kendall scrambled away from me.

Mrs. Wells rushed in, pointing a trembling finger at me.

"You respectable-looking scoundrel! Sneaking in here in the middle of the night to prey on my married daughter?"

The scream made my eardrums ring.

"I am not"

"Not what? I saw you! Groping my daughter, practically kissing! Are you shameless?"

"I knew no decent man would show up here on a holiday night! Blake is sleeping just down the hall! You think you can just march in here and steal someone's fianc right under our roof?"

Mr. Wells, now wearing his robe, rushed in, his face grim.

"Kendall! What is the meaning of this? Are you drunk or just plain stupid? You're throwing away a good man like Blake for this... this nobody?"

I looked at Kendall, waiting. I waited for her to speak the truth. I waited for the five words that would save me: He is my husband.

But the words never came. She looked at the floor, accepting the slander.

"Dad, Mom, its my fault. I just came in to bring him some water... he has a fever."

"Fever? That gives you license to seduce a woman whos practically engaged?" Her mother was hysterical.

I closed my eyes, exhausted by the absurdity.

"Get out," I croaked.

"What did you say?" Mrs. Wells kept railing.

"I said, Get the hell out!"

I roared the words, grabbing the rock-hard pillow and hurling it violently at Kendall.

She ducked away, pushing her furious parents out of the room.

The door slammed shut. Through the wood, I heard the old womans voice, raw with fury: "The nerve of that man! Tomorrow, he leaves! Don't let him stain our floors a minute longer!"

New Years Day. The living room was packed with extended family.

The moment I stepped out of the den, dozens of eyes, full of malicious curiosity, tracked my every step.

"Is that the shameless guy?"

"Hes not bad-looking, Ill give him that. No wonder he tries to steal other peoples girls."

"Blakes better. So much classier. If it were me, Id have thrown that guy out last night."

I walked through the gauntlet, my face a cold, blank mask, heading for the front door.

"Oh, leaving already? Not going to keep flirting?" Kendalls judgmental Aunt Beth hissed.

I stopped and fixed her with a cold stare.

At that moment, a sharply dressed man walked in, carrying several gift bags. It was Kendalls older brother, Grant Wells.

"Kai?" he blurted out.

A tiny, desperate spark of hope flared in my chest. Grant knows the truth.

But Grant caught sight of Blake, who was efficiently serving coffee, and his eyes shifted away from mine. He forced an awkward smile.

"Oh I guess youre Kendalls colleague?"

I managed a self-deprecating laugh, said nothing, and walked out the door.

Back in my New York apartment, the silence was deafening.

The wedding photo on the wallKendalls radiant, sincere smile. Our matching coffee mugs on the counter. Every corner of the apartment, a haunted relic of a shared life.

My phone was buzzing continuously. A cascade of texts from Kendall.

"Honey, did you make it back okay?"

"Im so sorry. I truly am. I was just being weak."

"Please dont be mad. Ill make it up to you, I promise."

I turned the phone off.

For the next two days, I was a ghost, unable to eat, floating through the apartment in a haze of confusion and hurt.

It wasn't until I found myself in the hospital, picking up a set of pre-holiday test results for Kendall, that I stopped cold.

She was six weeks pregnant.

The world stopped. God, are you playing some kind of sick joke?

Was this my child? If it was

Just as I decided to walk away from this poisoned marriage, fate handed me this tiny, unexpected life.

I remembered the silly, tender timesme listening to her flat stomach, promising a daughter who would be as beautiful as she was.

What if she really was just shallow, just vain? What if the whole thing with Blake was truly a platonic 'act' for the sake of her parents' pride?

For the child's sake, could I bury the truth and try again?

Kendall was home when I returned.

She rushed to me, throwing her arms around me.

"Kai! Where were you? I've been frantic! I thought I'd lost you!" Her voice trembled with what felt like genuine fear.

Breathing in her familiar scent, the last of my resolve crumbled.

"Kendall, if you're lying to me again, it's over. Truly over."

She nodded frantically. "I swear! Ill never pull a stunt like that again! Never!"

For the child, I was willing to risk one last act of faith.

That Friday, a week after I got back, was Valentine's Day. It was also the anniversary of our first date.

Before she left for work, Kendall gave me a deep, lingering kiss.

"Honey, wait for me tonight. I have a surprise for you."

I smiled and said I would.

After a week of her attentiveness and my own desperate self-counseling, I decided to erase the past. I prepared her favorite dishes and tucked the ultrasound printoutour secret, our futureinto a small velvet box, ready to deliver the life-changing news.

I waited from day to night. Expectation soured into a cold dread. The food sat uneaten.

I called her. Voicemail. I texted. No reply.

Shes in a meeting, her phone died, I told myself, clutching the desperate hope.

At eleven o'clock, I checked social media.

It was Blake. A carousel of photos, set in a chic, upscale restaurant. Blake, his parents, and right next to him, Kendall, radiant and laughing.

The caption was a knife:

First dinner with the wife's folks this year! #futuremrsH #soinlove

The sound was a roar in my ears. Logic dissolved into a raw, white-hot fire. I grabbed my keys, coat forgotten, and bolted for the elevator.

I was going to find her. I was going to ask this woman Id loved for eight years if her heart was made of stone. I was going to ask her why she was destroying us.

The elevator doors opened.

The steel reflected a pathetic stranger: hair a mess, eyes bloodshot, wearing one sneaker and one slipper. A discarded caricature of a man. Was this Kai Ashton? The sharp, confident man I used to be? Reduced to thisa weeping, betrayed husband chasing a liar?

Is she worth it?

The elevator stopped at the ground floor. The doors opened. The cold night air rushed in.

I looked at my reflection. I wiped the tears from my face. I stood up straight.

Then, I reached out and pressed the 'Close Door' button.

The velvet box with the ultrasound. I dropped it, along with the hopes it represented, into the stainless steel bin. This child, my child, deserved a father who wasn't a fool. It was gone.

I packed my bags that night.

Even if that baby were mine, I didn't want it anymore.