After His Amnesia

The year Wil lost his memory, I told him a lie. I told him I was his girlfriend.
Later, against all odds, I got pregnant.
He was ecstatic. He got down on one knee and asked me to marry him.
But just as I thought my secret, lifelong crush was finally about to have a happy ending, his memory came rushing back.
He accused me of being a manipulative liar, swore he would never acknowledge the child, and had me dragged to a clinic to terminate the pregnancy.
I died on that table, taking our child with me.
When I opened my eyes again, I was back in that same hospital room.

1
Wil was still lying on the hospital bed, his eyes shut tight. The air in the room was thick with a suffocating tension. I remembered the doctor's words: if he didn’t wake up today, he would likely remain in a vegetative state.
Wil’s mother, Catherine, was weeping softly while my own mom tried to comfort her. "There's still time," my mom murmured. "He'll wake up. I know he will."
The specific details of Wil’s awakening were a blur in my memory, but my mom was right. He was going to wake up.
My mother turned and saw me standing there, lost in a daze. She waved me over. "Nora, honey, come talk to Wil for a bit. Let Catherine have a rest."
At the sound of my name, Catherine looked over, her eyes red and swollen. These two women had doted on me my entire life. Even later, after Wil’s memory returned and he turned on me, they had both stood firmly by my side.
But this time…
I wanted to refuse, but I couldn't. Not now.
Just as I reached the bedside, Wil’s eyelids fluttered.
He opened his eyes, and we stared at each other. I never thought I would see him look at me with such calm neutrality again. In my last life, after his memory returned, his gaze was always filled with a chilling malice. We never again shared a proper meal, or even a single civil conversation. He called me a scheming bitch and swore the baby in my belly wasn't his.
I knew I was in the wrong, so I accepted his anger. But why did he have to go back on his word? Why did he have to destroy my child?
Our child.
A storm of emotion raged inside me, making it impossible to stay calm. I looked away, taking an involuntary step back.
Catherine rushed forward, her voice choked with relief. Soon after, Wil’s father and my own dad arrived. Wil was awake. It was a miracle.
But he had amnesia.
After her tears subsided, Catherine began to reintroduce him to his life.
"Wil, this is your Uncle David and Aunt Helen. Our families have been friends for generations."
"And this," she said, her gaze falling on me, "is Nora, David's daughter… and she's your—"
My name snapped me back to reality. The words burst out of me before I could stop them.
"His sister!"

2
It was a reflex.
I hadn't forgotten. In the last life, Catherine had sealed my fate with a single sentence. At this exact moment, she had introduced me to the memory-wiped Wil as his girlfriend.
The truth was, Wil already had a girlfriend. Seraphina Vance.
But in Catherine’s eyes, Seraphina was largely to blame for the accident. A few days before the crash, she had demanded they get engaged. Wil refused. In a fit of anger, Seraphina broke up with him and booked a flight out of the country. The accident happened while Wil was racing to the airport to stop her.
Catherine had never liked Seraphina, and this incident only solidified her prejudice. She had told me to use Wil's amnesia as an opportunity for us to build a real relationship.
Sometimes I wondered—if both our parents could see how much I loved Wil, could he really have been oblivious?
No. He knew. He just dismissed it as a childhood crush, the affection of a little sister for her older brother.
In my past life, Catherine's suggestion had made my heart pound with a dangerous hope. And what made me fall completely was how easily Wil accepted it. For the rest of his recovery, he wanted only me by his side.
Our relationship began with a lie and ended when the truth returned. He was convinced I was a pathological liar, that even our child was part of some elaborate scheme. No matter how I tried to explain that night was an accident, he refused to believe me. I had no credibility left in his eyes.
You were cruel to me, Wil. But you were just as cruel to your own child.
I pressed a hand to my flat stomach, a phantom ache twisting inside me like a knife. That baby… it never even had a chance to grow.
It was my fault.
So how could I possibly let myself make the same mistake all over again?
Catherine, after a moment of surprise, quickly went along with my new story. "That's right! You two grew up together, you're closer than real siblings!"
The adults launched into nostalgic stories from our childhood, their laughter filling the room.
Only Wil was silent, his deep, dark eyes fixed on me.

3
The doctors rushed in to run a full examination. I used the commotion as an excuse to slip away. As I walked out of the hospital's main entrance, the whole world felt like a dream. I couldn't tell which was the dream: this second chance, or the twisted love and hate I'd shared with Wil.
My head was about to explode when my phone rang.
I stared at the caller ID for a long time before answering. Ethan Cole's voice was urgent.
"Nora? Where are you?"
"I… Ethan? Why… why are you calling me right now?"
Ethan was my desk-mate in high school. He'd also once pretended to be my boyfriend. After I found out about Seraphina, I'd stubbornly told Wil that I was seeing someone too.
Wil had frozen for a second, then laughed, ruffling my hair with a little too much force. "Look at you, little girl. All grown up." His tone was so condescending, as if he were decades older, not just a few years.
A couple of days later, he'd insisted on meeting my new boyfriend for dinner. I couldn't think of anyone else, so I begged Ethan to help. At dinner, Ethan was perfect—attentive, charming, everything a good boyfriend should be. Wil had even remarked, with a self-deprecating smirk, "He's better at taking care of you than I am."
But after dinner, he'd pulled me aside. "I can see that he likes you," he'd said, his eyes serious. "But I can't see that you like him."
His words had left a sour, bitter taste in my mouth. Because he was right. I didn't like Ethan that way. Not long after, Ethan confessed his feelings for me. I turned him down, but he insisted we stay friends.
It wasn't until after Wil's memory returned, after he had cast me aside, that Ethan confessed his love for me again. By then, I was pregnant, exhausted, and utterly broken. I had no space in my life for anything else.
And then… I died.
"Don't ask so many questions," Ethan's voice crackled through the phone, pulling me from my thoughts. "I need to see you. Right now. Tell me where you are."
My brain sputtered. At this point in time, Ethan should have just been rejected by me. He was supposed to be on a business trip out of state.

4
After I hung up, an incredible thought took root in my mind.
If I could be reborn, why couldn't Ethan?
After all, only the Ethan from the future called me 'Nora' with that kind of warmth. Before, it was always just 'Hayes'.
My suspicion was confirmed moments later.
A car screeched to a halt, and Ethan jumped out, running towards me. He pulled me into a fierce, desperate hug. The chaotic mix of joy and terror on his face was something only I could understand.
"Sorry, I'm just… I had this horrible dream," he stammered, his voice muffled in my hair. "You were… there was so much blood…"
Trapped in his arms, I slowly lowered my eyes. We were both back. But I didn't want to relive any of it.

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