Trading My Heart For His New Princess

My father, Gary Miller, had spent the better part of two decades working out-of-state construction jobs, usually in some booming metropolis two states over. I grew up a ward of the state in all but name, raised by our neighbor, Mrs. Helen Davies, seeing him only a few times a year, sometimes not even then.

This year, for the first time in memory, he was actually home for the holidays. He stood awkwardly in the living room, clutching a worn manila envelope, which he tentatively pushed toward me.

Honey, you said you missed me on the phone. You asked me to send more pictures of myself. I brought them back for you.

I slammed the envelope onto the small end table. The deliverys done. You can go now.

Mrs. Davies face darkened immediately. Ava, thats enough. Stop this nonsense!

Nonsense? I yelled, my voice cracking slightly. How many years was I here, living on her charity, and did he ever genuinely care about me?

My Aunt Carol threw her hands up in exasperation. You ungrateful viper! You know how hard your father works, sweating on those scaffolds just to pay for your college tuition?

I let out a cold laugh and pointed at the envelope on the table. He should have bought me an apartment so I wouldnt have to live under someone elses roof anymore. Id apologize right now!

The living room erupted. My father, Aunt Carol, and the few neighbors whod come to greet him all started talking over each other, calling me spoiled and selfish.

I yanked the photos out of the envelope and slapped them across the table. See for yourselves!

My father glanced down at the scattered pictures, and the carefully constructed mask of the dutiful, hardworking dad instantly shattered.

1.

It was barely dawn, and I was still tangled in my duvet when the door to my room creaked open.

A sun-scorched, deeply lined face peered through the gap, stretching into a clumsy grin.

Honey, Dads home.

I stared at the familiar-unfamiliar face for a few seconds before slowly sitting up. Didnt you ever learn to knock first?

The smile froze on Garys face. He pulled a flimsy envelope from inside his jacket and carefully placed it at the foot of my bed.

You said you missed me when we spoke on the phone. His voice was tight, a nervous energy radiating off him. I had a few pictures developed in the city to bring back for you. So you can look at them when you miss me.

I turned my face away. Fine. You can go now.

Mrs. Davies, bless her heart, gently pulled him out of the doorway. The low, rustling sounds of hushed voices came from the hallwaya few neighbors had clearly gathered.

Its good to have you back, Gary. Tough work out there on the rigs

Gary Miller! Havent seen you in ages!

Hard work, but its all for the kids, right?

Avas grown up, Gary. You need to start worrying about her finding a good husband now!

I eventually opened the envelope and sifted through the photos, a bitter smile twisting my lips. I shoved the pictures back inside, got dressed, and walked out.

Aunt Carol was in the living room talking to Dad. When he saw me, his eyes lit up. He immediately reached down into the large, dirty duffel bag by his feet and clumsily ripped open two plastic bags.

Look, honey, Dad bought you some new clothes! He unfolded a cheap, bright red nylon coat. Try it on. See if it fits you.

I didnt take it. I didnt even look up at him. I walked straight to the sofa, sat down, and started peeling a clementine from the fruit bowl.

The gifts are delivered. Go back to work.

Dont waste your time here.

His hand was still suspended in the air, holding the bright red coat, the moment hanging heavy with his awkwardness.

Mrs. Davies rushed over to intervene. Ava, you silly child! Its the holidays! Your father is on vacation, hes not working!

I peeled a segment of the fruit and popped it into my mouth.

How come he never showed up for the holidays before? I finally raised my eyes to meet his. Why the sudden show of false concern this year? Did some relative give you the bright idea to come back and try to marry me off for a dowry?

I sneered. Aunt Carol exploded.

What are you saying! she shrieked. Dont you know how good your father has been to you? Your mother left, your grandparents passed, and he was the one who raised you, all by himself!

I kept peeling the orange, my eyes glued to my hands.

Oh, thats right. It was Dad who stayed up all night when I had a fever to rush me to the emergency room, and it was Dad who met with my teachers when the kids at school called me an orphan

The neighbors exchanged glances, their voices dropping into hushed whispers.

Wait, didnt Mrs. Davies practically raise Ava since she was a toddler?

That year Ava had the high fever, it was Helen who carried her to the clinic and stayed by her side for three days and nights.

And the parent-teacher conferences? Never saw Gary Miller there. Always Mrs. Davies.

Hardly ever a phone call, much less a visit

My fathers face was bright red with shame, but he stubbornly pushed the red coat closer to me. Honey, please, just stand up for a minute and try it on see if it looks nice

Stop it! I slammed my hand down.

The jacket flew out of his grasp and landed directly on the small, portable electric heater next to the sofa.

Oh! He cried out, practically diving to snatch the jacket back, but it was too late.

The lower hem of the nylon had melted, leaving a jagged, charred hole.

The tragedy! Aunt Carol shot up from her chair.

Do you know how many bricks your father has to lay, how much he has to sweat on that construction site, just to earn the money for this one coat? How can you be so selfish and ungrateful!

Your father came all this way just to see you, and this is how you treat him? Have you no conscience?

She was practically shaking with rage, her face scarlet.

Mrs. Davies hurried over, pulling the ruined coat from Garys trembling hand.

Its alright, its alright nobody panic, nobody yell

She looked up at me and the furious Carol, then back down at the jacket.

Let me see maybe I can find a way to patch it up if I sew it carefully, you wont even see it

I stood up, snatched the coat from Mrs. Davies hands, roughly crumpled it into a ball, and shoved it back into the dirty duffel bag. Then, I kicked the entire bag forcefully at his feet.

Sew what? The dogs on the street wouldnt touch this cheap trash!

Ava. Mrs. Davies squeezed my arm, her fingers trembling slightly.

You you werent like this before

Gary took an urgent step forward.

Honey, tell Dad, what did I do wrong? Did I not knock before coming in? Are the pictures not good enough, you dont like them?

Or are the pictures Dad took not handsome enough?

Aunt Carol, muttering under her breath, said, See? Spoiled! Such a temper. What man would want her now?

I turned sharply. At least I can keep a man. Didn't your husband leave you for the receptionist?

2.

Ava Miller, you will not speak to your aunt like that!

My father shielded Carol, his voice suddenly hard, brooking no argument.

If you dont like the pictures, Ill take new ones next time! Why take it out on your aunt!

No need.

Id rather not look at trash like that again.

I cut him off and sat back down on the sofa.

The other neighbors began muttering again. This girl is out of control now

She was so sweet as a kid, now shes just rebellious.

Her dad has it rough. Working hard for a few dollars, and he comes back to this

Aunt Carol couldnt hold back and lunged at me.

Mrs. Davies quickly grabbed my arm, her voice catching in her throat.

Ava, please, be quiet your father is home for the first time in so long

I remained silent.

Gary, seeing my lack of response, looked colder. He didnt speak for a long moment. I didnt acknowledge him, just held Mrs. Davies hand tightly.

After a tense, extended silence, dinner was served. I finally took Mrs. Davies hand and led her to the table.

Gary wiped his hands and spoke, the first to break the new silence.

Mrs. Davies told me you have a boyfriend? From Silverton County?

Seeing my lack of response, he continued on his own.

I worked construction near there. Even though Mrs. Davies says the boys family is well-off, I still need to check him out.

I didn't look up.

Aunt Carol immediately chimed in. Thats right! Your father is looking out for you, as any parent should. Its only you whos so ungrateful, treating your dad like dirt.

The other relatives nodded in agreement. Yes, yes, your father cares about you.

A parent has to be involved in things like this.

Letting people know you have family, so they wont dare to mistreat you later

I gave a cold laugh and delicately placed a soft piece of stewed rib into Mrs. Davies bowl.

Worried I wont be well-off? I smiled faintly.

Youve barely cared about me all these years. Why the sudden surge of parental concern?

I put down my chopsticks with a sharp clink.

Mrs. Davies gasped and quickly pulled my hand under the table. Child, how can you say that? Meeting the two families before marriage is customary, its proper etiquette!

I looked at Mrs. Davies. The worry in her eyes was genuine; she only ever wanted me to be happy and secure. I turned my hand and gripped her calloused, warm one.

Grandma, you just have to come with me.

Ive already told him I dont have any parents.

Clatter.

It was the sound of my fathers bowl hitting the table.

Mrs. Davies gasped, tightening her grip on my hand.

You! Aunt Carol shot up, her movement so fast that she knocked her chair over.

She rounded the table and, before anyone could react, slapped me hard across the face.

3.

Are you insane! Mrs. Davies shrieked, instantly standing up to shield me, but the enraged Aunt Carol shoved her hard.

Elderly and frail, Mrs. Davies stumbled backward.

Grandma! My heart seized.

I stepped across the floor and caught Mrs. Davies, then turned and shoved Aunt Carol with all my might.

She hadnt braced herself and let out a surprised yelp as she fell backward onto the floor.

Try touching her again, I dare you!

This is an outrage! Carol sat on the floor, her finger shaking as she pointed at me, wailing at Dad and Mrs. Davies.

Brother! Look at this daughter you raised! Look what this old witch has taught her!

Say that one more time, and I swear Ill kill you! I took a step forward, and Mrs. Davies held my arm in a death grip from behind.

What are you doing? What are you going to do? The relatives who had been siding with Carol jumped up, led by an older uncle figure who was pointing his finger in my face.

There are plenty of us here. You dare to attack your own aunt?

I looked at their faces, full of indignation and scorn, and ironically, I smiled.

Why the act? Who here doesnt know what you two are doing today? I turned to Carol on the floor.

My father gave you money years ago to check in on me. You took the money. How many times did you actually come by?!

Shut up! Dad yelled, his voice cutting and sharp.

He walked over and pulled the still-crying Carol up. Your aunt didnt take you in as a child because she had her own family to raise, and you were better off temporarily with Mrs. Davies!

And look at this ungrateful viper! Shed be a menace if she lived with anyone! a female relative spat.

You think I wanted to go to her house? I looked around at all of them.

Im done talking to you all. Take your gifts and get out!

Ava, stop it, listen to me! This is your father, your aunt, your only blood family Mrs. Davies was nearly sobbing, pulling me hard behind her and profusely apologizing to Dad and the relatives.

Shes still young, she doesnt know any better, shes just speaking out of anger.

Grandma, you dont have to apologize to them.

You are my only family. From now on, only you!

This is a sin! How did such a disgrace come out of the Miller family! The older uncle figure pounded his chest in anger.

The room was a chaos of raised voices and accusations.

Just then, my father, his eyes red-rimmed, reached into the inner pocket of his coat and threw a bank card onto the table.

4.

Enough! You want money, right? This is everything Ive saved, little by little, over the years. Ten thousand dollars. Its all for you!

This is half my lifes blood and sweat Youre my only daughter, how could I not love you! I wanted to establish myself out there, make big money, and then bring you to live a grand life, in a big house

Mrs. Davies covered her mouth, and Aunt Carol and the relatives all held their breath, looking at me.

I stared at the card for a long moment, then slowly raised my eyes to look at him, a slight, cruel smile curving my lips.

Ten thousand dollars, saved over half a lifetime, and thats the grand future youve painted for me?

Then you must be an absolute failure.

Dad stared at me, the pain in his eyes shifting into disbelief.

Ava what exactly do you want?

I slowly and deliberately stood up. Simple.

Buy me a house in Silverton County. Pay it in full. Then take your useless, trashy pictures and get out.

From this moment on, were even. We owe each other nothing.

Ava, youve lost your mind! Mrs. Davies shook with anger, her voice pitching high.

You cant do this, this is your father! There must be a limit to your temper tantrums!

I pulled my hand free from hers. Im just asking you, will you do it or not?

My fathers voice trembled with shock. Ava, I couldnt afford a house if I sold my own life!

It must be this old witch who put her up to this! A woman who hadnt spoken much suddenly pointed at Mrs. Davies and yelled.

Why else would a good girl turn out like this? Shes the one who taught the child to disown her own father!

God knows what kind of nonsense shes been feeding the girl all these years!

Thats right, she looks kind, but she has a venomous heart!

A barrage of accusations instantly flooded toward the elderly Mrs. Davies. She opened her mouth, trying to defend herself, but was too upset to utter a single word.

I looked at them, these people so ready to throw mud at the one person who had actually raised me. A violent rage surged up inside me.

It has nothing to do with Mrs. Davies! Today, Im asking him for a house, to pay off the debt he owes me from the last fifteen years!

I spun around, my eyes red, staring hard at my father.

You cant afford it? Then as far as Im concerned, your daughter is dead!

Take your pathetic card, your pathetic photos, and get out! Dont let me see you ever again!

My father stood there, his hands tightly clenched, then suddenly slammed his fist onto the nearby table.

This is unbelievable! Aunt Carol was the first to jump up, pointing at me and cursing.

Your father wasted his money on you all these years! All that education for nothing!

She grew more frantic and suddenly stormed into my room.

Look, everyone, look at how she lives! Carols voice boomed from my bedroom.

These clothes, these shoes, all these expensive books! What here wasnt bought with her fathers money? Shed be nothing without him!

Then came the sound of things crashingshe was rummaging through my closet and desk.

Mrs. Davies stumbled after her, her voice tearful. Dont go through the childs things, come out of there!

My heart tightened, and I quickly rushed over to help the nearly collapsing Mrs. Davies.

As I reached the doorway, I saw Carol violently throwing a few books and articles of clothing onto the floor. The room was a mess. Mrs. Davies, her eyes full of tears, followed behind, trying to pick things up.

The elderly uncle figure, who had been mostly quiet, also followed, frowning as he looked in the doorway. His gaze swept over the wreckage and then settled on the corner of my desk.

The manila envelope lay there.

He walked over and picked up the envelope.

Are these the photos Gary sent back?

He was holding the corner of the envelope, perhaps a little too tightly, just as he was about to speak.

CRACK!

The seam of the envelope suddenly tore open, and the several carefully printed color photographs scattered like confetti, drifting to the floor in front of everyone.

One of them landed perfectly, right next to my fathers mud-stained work boots.

Dad looked down at the photo by his feet, and for a few seconds, time seemed to stop.

Oh! How did that get here!

Dont look, nobody look!

Aunt Carol, who had been screaming moments before, froze.

The group of self-righteous relatives fell silent.