Love, Hate, and the Fading Dawn

The day my boyfriend won his gold medal.
I was so thrilled I stayed up all night. Id baked a cake and was hiding behind the curtains, ready to surprise him.
Instead, I overheard him talking to a friend.
And with a casual, careless tone, he revealed the secret hed kept from me for four years.
At the old mans family gala, he said, Im going to show up with his very pregnant stepdaughter. Thatll be a nice little surprise for him and that woman, dont you think?
The words hung in the air as he slammed the door behind him. A gust of wind billowed the curtains, revealing me.
The cake in my hands slipped, crashing to the floor and splintering into a dozen pieces.
So that was it. The four years wed spent together, the love I thought we shared, was nothing more than a long, calculated revenge plot.
Our four years of affection were a lie.
His promises of a future for me and our child were a lie.
His plan to take me home to meet his family was just a setup to humiliate my mother.
His stepmother.
1.
The night air was bitingly cold.
I picked up my phone, my fingers trembling as I dialed my mothers number. My voice shook.
Mom, you told me once that my stepfather has a son who refuses to come home.
What whats his name?
The line was noisy on her end, but my mothers voice was gentle.
His name is Addison Mackinnon.
My heart plummeted into an abyss.
The phone slipped from my grasp and clattered on the floor.
My mothers voice, now on speaker, sounded both warm and piercingly cruel.
He hasnt been home in years. All alone out there hes a pitiable boy, really. Your stepfather mentioned he just won a big award, a real hero for the country! Why do you ask, sweetheart?
Addisons voice echoed in my head, the words hed spoken in our living room just moments before.
Her mother was a homewrecker who drove my own mom to a car crash with the stress. It caused my grandfather to have a fatal heart attack. She destroyed my family, and I will make her pay.
The venom in his voice was like thunder in my ears.
He really was my stepfathers son.
Tears welled up, hot and fast. I took a shaky breath, forcing a smile I didnt feel.
No reason, Mom. Just curious.
After hanging up, I shakily got to my feet and cleaned up the ruined cake.
I walked into the bedroom and found the blue gift box Addison treasured, the one he kept hidden away.
On the phone earlier, Addison had mentioned a name Id never heard before.
Vivian.
In four years together, I never knew she existed.
But inside the box were stacks of love letters, all written in Addisons hand, all addressed to her.
My hands shook as I opened an envelope.
The pages were filled with a profound, undeniable love for a woman named Vivian.
A single tear fell, splashing onto the ink.
I tilted my head back, blinking rapidly, trying to stop the flood, but it was no use.
The tears fell relentlessly, a quiet storm mirroring the downpour outside.
At two in the morning, a cool draft swept through the apartment as the door opened.
Addison, dressed in a black shirt, flipped on the lights, his long-fingered hands graceful even in their weariness.
In the dim, warm light, I sat on the sofa, watching him. He looked exhausted but triumphant.
Addison, I asked, my voice flat. Who is Vivian?
Just before, on the phone, Addison had coldly sealed my fate.
She doesnt deserve to have my child. After I get my revenge, Ill make her get rid of it. Vivian is coming back to the country soon, and I wont let this woman interfere with our relationship.
At the mention of her name, Addisons tired eyes narrowed, locking onto me.
How do you know about her?
I had put the box and the letters back where I found them.
I only held up the bookmark hed been using for years. My voice was hoarse.
Its written right here. A gift from Vivian.
He had cherished that bookmark for three years.
It had come with a bracelet, the one he wore on his wrist every single day.
He never took it off.
I had asked about it once, and he had just gazed at it tenderly.
It was a gift from an older sister who was very kind to me when I was young.
My doubts had vanished then. I didnt press further.
I never imagined his kind sister was actually his secret love.
2.
Addisons face darkened as he carefully snatched the bookmark from my hand.
What gives you the right to touch my things? he snapped.
Clara, do you have any idea how important this is to me?
It was the first time he had ever raised his voice at me.
My eyes reddened. How important?
He gently placed the bookmark back inside his book.
For a man so tall and imposing, standing at six-foot-two, a flicker of vulnerability crossed his features.
Ten years ago, when I ran away from home if it wasnt for the person who gave me this, I might have died that year.
As if realizing hed said too much, he looked back at me, his expression hardening slightly.
Shes my savior, Clara.
A bitter smile touched my lips. Are you sure shes just your savior?
Addison frowned. Of course.
In four years, Addison and I had never fought.
He was the national hero, the Olympic champion.
I was the acclaimed ballerina, a gold medalist from a prestigious international company.
The world saw us as a perfect match, destined for each other.
But today, on the day he won his greatest prize, when I was twelve weeks pregnant with our child, I had to overhear those words.
I had to find those letters, overflowing with a love that wasnt for me.
I had to learn that our four years of seemingly perfect love were just an elaborate lie, a meticulously crafted trap for my mother.
The pain was so sharp it was hard to breathe.
I had always known my stepfather had a son, one who disapproved of the marriage and refused to come home.
I just never knew that son was Addison.
The Addison who had filled my entire college life, the Addison I had loved with all my heart for four years.
Tears streamed down my face.
My voice was a whisper. Addison in these four years, have you ever lied to me?
A flicker of panic crossed his eyes.
He reached out and wiped a tear from my cheek, his gaze a storm of complex emotions.
Never, Clara. I love you so much. How could I ever lie to you?
Addison was devastatingly handsome.
With his captivating eyes, high-bridged nose, and sharp, elegant features, he possessed an untamable air.
Fresh off his Olympic victory, he was more radiant than ever.
And this brilliant man had seemingly given his whole heart to me.
At our graduation, in front of everyone, hed announced his intention to marry me and start a family.
He willingly gave me every cent hed ever won from his competitions.
Everyone said he was a good man.
I believed it too.
But his next words sent my already cold heart plunging into an abyss.
Next week, Im taking you home to meet my parents. Im going to introduce you to them with all the fanfare you deserve.
But you know my relationship with my father is strained, Clara. Im only going back for you, to marry you. So you have to look absolutely stunning when you come with me to his birthday gala.
He wanted me, his stepdaughter, to get all dressed up.
To show up pregnant, as his girlfriend, at his fathers birthday.
How absurd.
How utterly cruel.
Addison held me tight, but his embrace felt like ice.
Silent tears slipped from the corners of my eyes.
From the very beginning, he had never felt a single shred of genuine love for me.
3.
The next day, I went to the hospital and scheduled an abortion.
When I got back, I gathered all the baby clothes I had bought.
The joy and anticipation I once felt for this childs arrival now felt like a crushing weight of grief.
But no matter how much it hurt, no matter how much I didnt want to let go, I couldnt bring the child into a world of resentment and lies.
Through my tears, I threw every tiny outfit, every little baby item, into the trash.
When I was done, I called my senior from the dance company.
Ive made up my mind. Im accepting the offer from the New York Ballet.
A month ago, because Addison had asked me to stay, I had chosen not to terminate the pregnancy. I had given up the chance to join one of the worlds most prestigious companies, joyfully waiting for him to marry me.
All for this devastating blow.
My phone buzzed with a notification.
A reservation for the restaurant Addison had carefully selected for our fourth anniversary.
Right. Today was our anniversary.
He had promised me a huge surprise.
I didnt want to go, but a tiny, foolish sliver of hope pulled me there.
But Addison never showed up.
Soft music played in the restaurant. Outside the window, the city skyline glittered across the river, its reflection shimmering on the dark water.
I waited for three hours. I was still waiting when fireworks suddenly lit up the night sky over the river.
A crowd had gathered on the riverbank, their faces turned upward, watching as drones spelled out a message in the sky.
WELCOME HOME, VIVIAN. ILL PROTECT YOU NOW.
In that instant, I knew why Addisons phone had been off all night.
Why he had missed our anniversary dinner.
She was back.
Cheers erupted from the riverbank. I saw Addisons silhouette on a boat, a graceful woman standing beside him.
He waved to the crowd on the shore, a triumphant smile on his face.
He looked like he had conquered the world.
I forced down a bite of steak. It tasted like ash.
A stubborn mist clouded my vision.
I dropped my fork and knife with a clatter, the memory of the day hed asked me out flashing in my mind.
The confident, vibrant look on his face.
Clara, be my girlfriend!
It all sounded so hollow now, so pathetic.
My appetite was gone. I went to the restroom.
On my way out, I saw Addison and Vivian being seated at a table right next to mine.
Addison glanced around, as if looking for me.
When he didn't see me, a visible wave of relief washed over him.
I stood there by the restroom door, watching him carefully serve Vivian, cutting her steak for her, his eyes filled with a deep, unmistakable love.
It was the first time I had seen her.
She was beautiful, but not in a delicate, fragile way.
She had a chic, sharp bob, with strong eyebrows and deep red lips.
She radiated the confidence of a powerhouse.
No wonder Addison had been so certain he would make me get rid of our child, so determined not to let me get in the way of his pursuit of her.
A woman like that wouldnt be a fool for love like me.
An hour and a half later, they finished their meal and prepared to leave.
I rubbed my aching legs and went downstairs.
The food on my table was cold.
I picked up my purse and walked out of the restaurant.
Surprisingly, Addison called me back.
Clara, you didnt go to the restaurant, did you? Im so sorry, training ran so late today, I completely forgot about our anniversary.
Ill make it up to you next time, okay?
A cold wind whipped around me, lifting the ends of my hair.
I watched as Addison, not far away, gallantly opened the car door for Vivian. I let out a soft, empty laugh.
Its okay. I forgot, too.
Back home, I sat by the window for a long time, lost in thought.
I remembered the little moments from my four years with Addison.
I had enrolled in the universitys dance program behind my mothers back.
She had been a ballerina of some renown herself, but because of it, she was dismissed as just a pretty face and looked down upon by Addisons family.
Her failure to be with his father was her lifes great regret.
So, growing up, she forbade me from learning ballet.
But I had watched her dance my entire life. Ballet was in my blood.
Thankfully, my biological father saw my talent and went against my mothers wishes to send me to a dance academy.
After he died, my mother threatened to disown me if I didnt quit.
But I refused.
During my freshman year, our relationship hit rock bottom.
I was miserable for a long time, earning the nickname Ice Queen from my classmates.
It was Addison who entered my world, who patiently broke down my walls, encouraging and comforting me.
Slowly, I let go of my resentment, focused on my dancing, and achieved unexpected success.
By my junior year, my mother had softened. She no longer tried to stop me from dancing.
Our relationship began to heal.
Back then, full of innocent curiosity, I asked Addison, You said a homewrecker stole your father. Have you ever thought about getting rid of her?
At the time, Addison had just looked at me, a deep, unreadable expression in his eyes, before laughing.
I didn't understand the meaning behind his gaze then.
But now, I think I finally did.
He hadnt just thought about it. He had put a plan into motion.
He had used four precious years of his life to weave a beautiful dream for me.
All to deliver a devastating blow to my mother and stepfather.
But he had no idea.
In the twisted story of the previous generation
His mother was the one who had destroyed a real relationship. His mother was the homewrecker.
4.
Addison spent a full week with Vivian.
It gave me the time I needed to go to the hospital and end the pregnancy.
I packed up my belongings in our apartment, every item a painful memory.
We had moved into this place together our sophomore year.
Just a few weeks ago, I was planning to buy it, to make it our marital home.
But before the papers could be signed, everything fell apart.
The starry lights on the windowsill, wed strung them up together.
The blanket on the sofa, wed bought it on a weekend trip.
Every quirky lamp and fixture, wed chosen them all.
The home we had lovingly built had become a prison of memories.
On the day of the gala, Addison called me early.
Clara, the dress is on its way, and Ive booked a makeup artist for you. Be on time, okay? I have something to take care of, so Ill see you there.
I nodded numbly into the phone and said, Okay.
After we hung up, I arranged for a courier to have the dress redirected to Vivians address.
I also paid the makeup artist extra to go there instead.
With that done, I took a taxi to the airport.
The plane climbed into the sky, leaving the capital city behind.
I gazed out the window at the endless sea of clouds and slowly closed my eyes.
Some goodbyes are inevitable.
In the silence of my heart, I said my final farewell to Addison.

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