The Nth Failure

Everyone noticed I wasn't chasing Anthony anymore.
Even Anthony himself.
After school, he blocked my path, his face a cold mask.
About the other day, he said, his voice flat. I'm only saying this once, believe it or not.
Lily was cornered by some drunk guy. I went to help her.
My bad for not calling.
That day was his birthday.
While he was getting into a fight for Lily, I was left stranded at the amusement park all day.
So, he thought I was just sulking about that.
I gave a slight shake of my head. "It's okay."
Then, under his dark, unreadable gaze, I quietly stepped around him and walked away.
He didn't know. The system had registered his ditching me again as the final straw. My mission was a failure.
In one month, I would be erased and sent back to my own world.
And this body would be reclaimed by its original owner.
1
The amusement park staff had already reminded me for the third time that they were closing.
The system sighed in my head.
Aphra, let's go home.
Anthony's not coming. He's with Lily right now. He's completely forgotten he was supposed to meet you here today.
I stamped my aching feet, clutching the cake box, and turned to leave.
"Okay."
The bright bubble of anticipation Id felt this morning had been worn down to nothing. All that was left was a quiet emptiness.
I felt nothing, even when the system announced my failure.
In one month, you'll be in a car accident.
This is the penalty for your failure.
While you're in a coma, I'll send your soul back to your world. As for this body, its original owner will take over again.
After delivering the news, the system went silent.
I pulled out my phone to call a ride, only to see the battery icon flash red before the screen went black.
And I didn't have any cash for a cab.
Finally resigning myself to my fate, I started the long walk home along the edge of the road.
Failure had always been a possibility, but a profound exhaustion still seeped into my bones, making every step feel impossibly heavy.
2
The walk home from the park took me past the school.
It was a Saturday, so the campus should have been deserted. But there, on a bench just outside the school gates, sat two very familiar figures.
Lily was holding a single Twinkie-like cake with a matchstick stuck in it.
"I'm so sorry, Anthony" she said softly. "I only just found out it was your birthday, so I didn't have time to get a proper cake. This was all I could find. I hope you don't mind"
The boy across from her had fresh cuts on his cheek and a bandage wrapped around his forehead. The gauze was partially hidden by his dark, messy hair, giving him a lazy, roguish charm despite the injuries.
He didn't seem to find the makeshift cake ridiculous at all. He even took out a lighter and dutifully lit the matchstick.
"Not at all," he said. "I think it's great."
His voice, usually so cold, had a soft edge to it, like he was trying to soothe her.
I couldn't help but remember last night.
In the school's baking club, Id held out the birthday cake I'd spent ages perfecting, showing it to Anthony.
"Isn't it pretty?"
He was leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed. His eyes flicked to my hand, where a fresh blister was rising from a burn. His voice was laced with impatience.
"Just looking at your hand is enough to ruin my appetite."
A flush of embarrassment crept up my neck, and I tried to hide my hand in my sleeve. Anthony's expression was weary. He walked over and dragged me towards the nurses office.
"What are you hiding?" he grumbled. "Don't you have a brain? You treat a burn right away."
He looked annoyed, but his touch was gentle and patient as he treated the wound.
I found my courage again and asked, my voice hopeful, "So do you like the cake?"
He stared at the blister on my hand, his brow furrowed.
"It's hideous."
Back then, the system had tried to comfort me.
Don't listen to him! He's just mad you hurt yourself making it. He's all bark and no bitehe really cares about you!
My thoughts snapped back to the present. I stood quietly across the street, watching Anthony reassure Lily that her simple offering was more than enough.
It hit me then. Even someone as guarded and prickly as Anthony could be gentle. When he truly liked someone, he would sheath his thorns, protect their feelings, and couldn't bear to see them disappointed.
I didn't know what he felt for me, but it definitely wasn't love.
3
I turned to leave, but Lily spotted me. "Aphra? What are you doing here?"
Anthony looked up, and his gaze fell on the cake box in my hands. A flicker of somethingrealization?crossed his face. It was as if he was only just remembering our plans.
Lily saw the cake too. "Oh, you were looking for Anthony, weren't you?" she said, a little too brightly. "I heard you were going to celebrate his birthday at the amusement park. Sorry you got stood up because of me."
Her apology was casual, almost bored. She was used to Anthony dropping everything for her, leaving me behind. And I was used to it too. Id get mad for a day or two, then go right back to chasing after him like a lost puppy.
I shook my head, denying her first question. "I was just passing by."
Anthonys eyes were locked on me, his expression tight.
Lily just smiled, clearly assuming I was making an excuse to save face. She gestured towards the cake. "Well, perfect timing! You brought the cake. We can still celebrate."
When she reached for it, I pulled back. "It's gone bad," I said, my voice steady. "We can't eat it."
I pressed my lips together, then managed a small farewell. "It's getting late. I should get home. Bye."
Lily looked genuinely surprised. I was usually the one looking for any excuse to stick to Anthony's side. Now, I was willingly leaving them alone.
I took a few steps, then remembered something and turned back, feeling a little embarrassed.
"Lily," I asked, "Can I borrow twenty bucks? My phone died, and I can't call a ride."
"I'll take you." Anthony's voice was tight, the words rushing out almost before Id finished my sentence.
I acted as if I hadn't heard him.
Lily stammered, "Uh, yeah, sure" She fumbled in her purse and handed me a bill.
"Thanks. I'll pay you back on Monday."
I took the money and left.
The entire time, I never once looked at Anthony.
4
Maybe it was because I knew I was going home soon.
That night, I dreamed of my life in the real world.
I was in the library between classes, sobbing over a novel.
My best friend looked at me, confused. "Isn't that supposed to be a romance?"
"Not for Anthony, the second male lead!" I hiccupped, wiping my eyes. "His life is just so tragic! He spends his whole life secretly in love with the heroine, Lily, but he's too insecure about his poor background to ever confess. Even when he becomes this super-successful CEO at the end, he never tells her. He just protects her from the shadows."
"And to make it worse," I fumed, "he's constantly bullied in high school by the villainess, this spoiled rich girl named Aphra Sterling."
My friend handed me a tissue. "Your name is Talia. Her name is Aphra. Kind of close."
I slammed my hand on the table. "I am deeply ashamed of the connection."
That very night, I woke up inside the book, in the body of Aphra Sterling, the character I despised most.
The system's directive was simple: Win over Anthony.
This was the year Aphra made his life hell. The difficulty was off the charts.
The system studied my ecstatic expression.
This is a nightmare-level mission. Why are you so happy?
"Because now I can change his miserable youth!" I bounced on my feet, my bangs flying. "I'm going to give him everything, so he never has to suffer again."
The system had no faith in me. It said it was just waiting for the clock to run out before sending me back.
I spent two years trying to melt Anthony's icy heart. Id gotten his affection level so high that even the system thought victory was within reach.
But in the end, I still failed.
I couldn't really blame Anthony, though. He was in love with Lily. It was only natural for him to put her first, to do anything for her.
It's a simple truth I only understood once I finally stopped loving him.
5
Id spent all of yesterday out in the wind.
So it was no surprise when I woke up the next morning with a cold.
After taking some medicine, I got a call from one of Anthony's friends.
"Aphra! J-man's doing a birthday do-over today. At the amusement park, the one you guys were supposed to go to. You coming?"
Anthony never cared about birthdays. I knew this was his way of making up for yesterday.
My voice was thick with congestion when I spoke. "You guys have fun. I'm going to the library today."
The guy's voice moved away from the phone. "Yo, Anthony, Aphra says she can't make it."
A few seconds later, I heard a short, derisive laugh from Anthony's direction.
"Whatever."
His reaction didn't surprise me. Anthony had never had much patience for me. This was the closest he could get to an apology.
A cough escaped me.
His friend heard it. "Whoa, Aphra, you sick? Never mind then. Get some rest."
Right before he hung up, I heard him ask, "Hey, where'd Anthony go?"
Someone else answered, "Looked like he was heading to the pharmacy."
"A pharmacy? Why? Didn't he just get his cuts looked at?"
"No idea."
6
I went to the library with Evan.
Evan was the original Aphra's childhood best friend. He was also the only person in this world who knew I wasn't her.
Hed figured it out not long after I arrived. He had cornered me, his eyes sharp and assessing.
"Stop lying," he'd said with a humorless smile. "You can't fool me. Nobody knows Aphra better than I do."
After I confessed everything about the mission, he was only shocked for a moment before accepting it. Maybe it was because I was wearing Aphra's face. For the past two years, he'd been a good friend to me, one of the most important people I had in this world.
On the way to the library, I told him the mission had failed.
"So, in a month, you're leaving?"
"Yep. The real Aphra will be back soon. You'll get your best friend back."
Evans messenger bag swung against his back with each step. He just smiled, not responding, his eyes empty of any real emotion.
7
We didn't leave the library until closing time.
Evan's house was right next to mine. I stopped at his gate, ready to say goodbye, but he was staring silently ahead, at my front door.
I followed his gaze and met the dark, intense eyes of Anthony.
He stood there in a black windbreaker, which only made his pale face seem colder. The cuts on his cheekbone and jaw added a hint of defiant aggression to his look. He was holding a small plastic bag from a pharmacy.
I snapped out of it and turned back to Evan. "Well, you're home. I'll see you later. Bye."
He could tell I didn't want him involved. He just nodded. "Call me if you need anything."
The click of Evan's front door closing echoed in the quiet street.
Anthony's gaze followed me as I walked up to him, my fingers tightening on the strap of my backpack.
"Did you need something?" I asked.
He ignored my question. "Aren't you sick?" he shot back. "You seemed pretty happy chatting with him. You look fine to me."
As if to prove him wrong, a tickle in my throat made me cough twice. The mockery in his eyes faded slightly.
"If that's all, I'm going inside," I said, my nose stuffy.
He shifted, blocking my way. The cold clinging to his clothes made me shiver. I wondered how long he'd been standing out here.
"Why are you running around with him when you're sick?" He shoved the pharmacy bag into my hands, his face a grim mask.
"And about yesterday," he said, his voice clipped. "I'm only saying this once, believe it or not. Lily was cornered by some drunk guy. I went to help her. But I forgot to call you, and I made you wait. That was my fault."
As far as I knew, Anthony wasn't the type to explain himself to anyone. The fact that he came here today was a surprise. But beyond that, I felt nothing.
I pushed the bag of medicine back at him and looked up. "Thanks, but I can't take this. I can buy my own medicine. And I accept your apology for yesterday. Was there anything else? I really need to get inside."
Anthonys lips pressed into a thin line as his eyes bored into me, as if silently demanding, What is wrong with you?
When he didn't answer, I took it as my cue to leave. I murmured a quiet "goodbye" and slipped past him into the house.
From my bedroom window, I looked down. He stood frozen in place for a long time. Then, as if a bitter realization had finally dawned on him, he let out a cold, self-deprecating laugh. He tossed the bag of medicine into the nearby trash can and walked away, his face a blank slate.
He must have finally understood.
This wasn't me being petty. This was me giving up on him for good.
8
I suppose because I'd been the one chasing him the longest and the loudest, no one really noticed when I suddenly and silently stopped.
During gym class, the guys were playing basketball.
Both Anthony and Evan got injured at the same time.
As soon as I heard, I rushed to the nurse's office.
Anthony was a brutally efficient fighter. He rarely lost. Over the past two years, his reputation had grown enough to scare off the local troublemakers. It also earned him a crowd of admirers.
In the nurse's office, Anthony was surrounded by a group of guys. Evan, on the other hand, was alone, save for the gym rep who offered a few half-hearted words of concern.
One of Anthony's friends saw me and grinned.
"Whoa, easy there, Aphra," he teased. "J-man's fine. No need to panic. You'd think your crush was on his deathbed."
Anthonys jaw was tight. He didn't even look up.
I couldn't believe even his friends hadn't noticed that I'd stopped trailing him everywhere. I pretended not to hear and walked past them, stopping in front of Evan.
"Is it bad? Do you need me to get you out of school to go to the hospital?" After all, Evan had taken care of me when I was sick.
A tense silence fell over the room, as if the air itself had solidified.
Evan glanced over at Anthony's back. "It's nothing serious," he said, then winced. "Just hurts a bit." He gave me a helpless smile. "But I don't think I can get back to class on my own. Help me out, Aphra?"
I nodded.
Evan draped his arm over my shoulder, and I helped him limp out of the room.
9
After that, it seemed like everyone else finally caught on.
No one made jokes about Anthony and me anymore.
A few days later, the system reappeared without warning. It had a new mission for me.
I pulled some strings for you, it said. If you succeed, the car accident won't be painful at all.
Your senior graduation ceremony is next week, right?
To avoid interfering with exam prep, the school always held the graduation ceremony early in the final semester.
I heard each class only gets to put on one performance. Aphra, all you have to do is secure that performance slot. Succeed, and the mission is complete.
The next day, I saw the sign-up sheet.
Besides me, three other people had applied for the slot.
Lily was doing a piano piece. The arts rep was singing a solo. And some guy was planning to do a stand-up comedy routine.
Like the arts rep, I signed up for a solo. It was the only talent I really had.
To be fair, the class president decided we would each record our performances. During the next class meeting, we would play the videos for everyone, and the class would vote for who would represent us.
10
The class meeting ended without a decision.
Lily and I were tied for first place.
The class president looked miserable. "Did anyone not vote yet?"
Someone shouted, "Anthony didn't vote! He wasn't here today."
So, the president decided we would hold a re-vote between me and Lily in three days.
Evan looked annoyed. "The class is split fifty-fifty between you and Lily," he said as we sat by the window in a coffee shop. "Anthony is the only one left. And we both know who he's going to vote for. This is bullshit."
Outside, cars sped through the intersection, their velocity a visceral, visible force. For a second, I was reminded of the accident waiting for me.
It was impossible not to be scared.
I clutched my warm drink. "I want to try," I said.
"Try what?"
"To convince Anthony to vote for me."
11
When I still liked Anthony, trying to please him was second nature.
Now, even just starting a conversation felt awkward and strange.
The day before the vote, the moment the final bell rang, I gathered my courage and walked to his desk.
"Uh, do you have a minute?"
He was leaning back in his chair. He glanced up. "What is it?"
I nodded twice.
A light, quick set of footsteps approached from behind. "Anthony!"
It was Lily.
"Will you come with me to feed the stray cats after school tonight?"
A familiar wave of disappointment washed over me. I lowered my head, ready to walk away.
"Can't tonight," Anthony said, his voice even.
Lily seemed surprised by the rejection. It was a rare occurrence. She paused, then smiled sweetly. "Oh, okay I guess I'll go by myself then."
Soon, the classroom was empty except for us.
Anthony didn't look at me, his eyes half-lidded. "Spit it out. What do you want?"
I quickly pulled a tube of ointment from my bag. "I saw the cuts on your face haven't healed yet, so I bought this for you"
It was a clumsy attempt at bribery. My motives were painfully obvious. I cringed, bracing myself for his mockery.
But his expression didn't change. He took the tube, turning it over in his hand.
An idea struck me. "Here, let me put it on for you."
His response was to hand the tube back to me.
I pulled up a chair and sat beside him. Dabbing the ointment onto a cotton swab, I carefully applied it to his wounds.
The only sounds in the empty classroom were our brief exchanges.
"Anthony, turn your head a little."
"Is this a cut here, too?"
"Yeah."
"This one hasn't scabbed over yet. Will this sting?"
"No."
After I finished, I tried to figure out how to bring up the vote. But he beat me to it.
"Just say it," he said flatly. "What do you need from me?"
Caught, my face burned with embarrassment. I took a deep breath and met his gaze.
"Tomorrow for the performance vote can you vote for me? This spot is really, really important to me."
It was the first time I'd ever tried to bribe someone, and I was stumbling over my words.
"Are are you hungry? I can, uh, I can buy you dinner?"
As I started to offer him a new laptop or a gaming console, he cut me off.
"Aphra."
He looked directly at me. After a long pause, his deep voice resonated beside my ear.
"You want my vote? Answer one question."
"What?"
"Do you like Evan?"
I shook my head. "We've always just been friends. Does that have anything to do with your vote?"
He didn't answer, but the chill in his eyes seemed to thaw a little. He stood up, looking like he was about to leave.
I pressed my lips together. "So, will you vote for me tomorrow?"
Anthony stretched his neck and slung his backpack over his shoulder. As he walked out of the classroom, he gave a lazy, single-word reply.
"Yeah."
12
Before the class meeting, my deskmate looked at me, surprised.
"Why are you so happy? You're practically buzzing."
I just smiled, not saying a word.
I get to go home without any pain.
The bell rang. The class president went to the front to start counting the votes.
"Oh, right," he said. "Before I start, Anthony, you voted this time, right?"
I turned to look at him, an uncontrollable smile spreading across my face. Our eyes met for a second before he quickly looked away.
"I voted."
A sudden, terrible feeling began to crawl up my spine.
The president counted the ballots, one by one. Each second stretched into an eternity of torment.
"Okay, that's all of them," he finally announced. "Lily wins by one vote."
A bright smile lit up Lily's face. "Thank you, everyone, for your support."
The president nodded. "I'll submit your performance piece after class."
My fingers went slack.
The pen slipped from my grasp and clattered to the floor. The sharp sound drew a few glances.
In the quiet room, a sudden snort of laughter broke the silence.
"Seriously? Look at her face. What did she honestly expect?"
"It's Anthony. Of course he was going to vote for Lily. That was a given."
"I know, right? It's been two years. You'd think she'd have figured out she'll never be more important to him than Lily."
"Hilarious."
The words had barely left her mouth when a textbook slammed down on her desk.
Evan leaned over, a cold smile on his face. "Got a problem? Say it louder."
My gaze was unfocused, fixed on my own fingertips. The mocking voices sounded distant, echoing in my ears, striking again and again like a dull drumbeat.
The last sound I registered was the system's weary sigh.
Aphra.
You've failed again.

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