Bananas and the Monkey Me

1
Payday. The day I was supposed to see a hundred grand hit my account. Instead, I saw one thousand.
I went to my bosss office to find out why.
He slapped the pay stub on his desk and roared, A hundred-thousand-dollar bonus? Have you got dollar signs in your eyes? Our receptionist, Chloe, makes two thousand a month. The janitor makes fifteen hundred. What makes you so damn special?
I fought to keep my voice steady. I generated fifty million in revenue for this company this year. According to my contract, this is what Im owed.
Dont you dare talk to me about contracts! This company gave you the platform to succeed! Without us, who the hell are you? he spat, his face turning beet red. I dont care about your numbers; I care about attitude! Others are grateful for a couple of grand, and you have the nerve to question me over this?
He leaned forward, his voice a low threat. Mention money again, and Ill dock that thousand, too.
After a long, tense silence, I finally nodded.
Fine. A thousand it is.
Noah Cross had been a capitalist pig for so long, hed forgotten a simple truth.
You pay peanuts, you get monkeys.

Youre right, Mr. Cross, I said, my voice smooth as glass. I was being selfish, too focused on my own gain.
Cross blinked, clearly thrown by how quickly Id folded. A slow, smug smile spread across his face as he leaned back in his leather throne.
Thats more like it. Youre young, Lana. You need to think long-term. Dont get hung up on a little bit of cash. Keep working hard, and the company will take care of you.
Understood, Mr. Cross. Ill get back to work.
The moment I turned, I pulled out my phone and screenshotted the bank notification.
From this second forward, every extra ounce of effort I put in would be a personal failure.
Returning to my desk, the air was thick with a strange tension. I could feel the eyes on my back, and then came the snide remarks from Kevin, the head of Sales Team B.
Well, well. Some people really think theyre hot stuff. Take away the company name, and who even knows who you are?
A few of the junior reps who used to trail after me like puppies chimed in with muffled laughter.
I heard they cut her entire bonus. She only got a grand? Thats hilarious. I made more than that as an intern.
She always struts around like she owns the place. Guess this brought her back down to earth. Mr. Cross was doing her a favor by setting her straight, and she was too stupid to see it.
Shh, keep it down. Shes probably fuming. Might bite your head off.
The old me would have shut them down with my sales figures.
But now? I just swallowed the bitter taste in my mouth and said nothing.
I glanced at the clock.
5:01 PM.
Official office hours were nine to five, but Id never left before eight, often grinding away until the early morning hours. I used to believe hard work paid off. Now, I just thought I was an idiot.
I started packing my things, closing the half-finished PowerPoint without saving.
My assistant, Lily, stared at me, her eyes wide.
Lana are you leaving?
Yep. Its quitting time.
Lilys gaze flickered between me and the clock on the wall. She lowered her voice to a whisper. But Mr. Cross just posted in the group chat. Theres a mandatory project review meeting at six.
Oh. Well, you go have fun with that. I shrugged. Company policy says the workday ends at five. It is now five-oh-one. I am officially on my personal time.
With that, under Lilys horrified stare, I strode toward the time clock.
Just my luck, Cross was walking out of his office and saw me standing by the elevator, bag slung over my shoulder.
His face darkened instantly.
Lana! Where do you think youre going?
The elevator doors slid open.
I turned back, plastering an innocent look on my face. Home, Mr. Cross. The workday is over.
Over? His voice shot up an octave. We havent had the review meeting! Is the proposal for tomorrows client finished? You dare walk out at a time like this?
I held the elevator door open with my hand, my voice calm. Mr. Cross, you just taught me a valuable lesson. Dont think of myself as special. I should compare myself more to Chloe at the front desk, or the cleaning staff.
Ive been reflecting on your wisdom, and youre absolutely right, I continued, my smile never wavering. Chloe leaves at five on the dot every day. The janitor doesnt need to understand business analytics. As for something as important as a project review meeting, a thousand-dollar employee like me shouldnt be wasting your valuable time.
I let go of the button. The doors began to close, shutting out the sight of his apoplectic face.
His furious roar echoed down the hall just before they sealed shut.
Lana! Youre out of your goddamn mind! If that proposal isnt on my desk tomorrow, you can pack your shit and get the hell out!
Get out? He should be so lucky.
If I walked out now, that hundred grand would be gone forever. He was just trying to find a pretext to fire me so he wouldnt have to pay.
Too bad for you, Noah.
We salespeople are experts at two things: reading people and playing dirty.
The next morning, I walked into the office at 9 AM on the dot.
Cross was standing by the reception desk, his face a thundercloud.
He sneered as I walked in. Well, look who it is. Her Royal Highness decided to grace us with her presence, right on time?
I smiled brightly. Good morning, Mr. Cross. Adhering to the companys attendance policy is every employees duty. Arriving even a minute early would be a waste of company resources. I know how much you care about the electricity bill.
A few colleagues nearby choked back laughter, their faces turning red.
Crosss jaw twitched, but he didnt take the bait. He just stuck out his hand. The proposal. The one for Apex Corp. The client is coming in at ten for the presentation.
Apex Corp was our biggest target this year, a potential twenty-million-dollar deal.
Normally, a proposal of this magnitude would take me three all-nighters to perfect. Pages and pages of data analysis, competitive research, and a deep dive into the personal preferences of the Apex CEO.
But now
I emailed it to you.
Cross shot me a suspicious glare before storming back to his office.
Less than three minutes later, a roar erupted from within.
Lana! Get in here, NOW!
Whats the problem, Mr. Cross?
He jabbed a trembling finger at his computer screen. This is your proposal? What is this dogshit?!
On the screen was a pathetic five-page PowerPoint. It was filled with impressive-sounding corporate jargon that meant absolutely nothing.
I dont see the issue, Mr. Cross, I said calmly. The logic is clear, the vocabulary is high-level. It looks perfectly professional.
You call this a proposal? He slammed his mouse on the desk. Wheres the data analysis? The competitor breakdown? The execution details? Its all just empty buzzwords! Are you trying to make me look like a complete fool in front of the client?
I spread my hands in a gesture of helplessness. Mr. Cross, for a thousand-dollar salary, what kind of in-depth analysis were you expecting?
I leaned against the doorframe. Besides, you said it yourself yesterday. The platform is what matters most. With a platform as powerful as ours, surely we dont need my insignificant little data points to land a client?
Crosss face went from red to a terrifying shade of purple. He clutched his chest, pointing a shaky finger at me. You you
Lana, this is willful negligence! This is a serious breach of conduct! I can fire you for this on the spot!
I didnt flinch. Instead, I helpfully pulled out a chair for him. Mr. Cross, the definition of willful negligence is refusing to do the work. But I did the work. The proposal was submitted, and I clocked in on time. As for the quality well, thats a matter of capability, isnt it?
If you feel Im no longer competent for my role, fine. But youll need to provide evidence of my incompetence. Firing me without cause? Thats wrongful termination. Youd be looking at double the severance pay. Lets see that would be around four hundred thousand dollars.
I beamed at him.
And the client would be here at ten.
No one else in the entire company could close the CEO of Apex Corp in that little time.
Cross took several deep, shuddering breaths, forcing his rage down. His eyes turned cold and venomous. Fine. Fine, Lana. You want to play games? Lets play.
Youre doing todays presentation. And if you screw it up, if you cost this company a major client, youre not just fired, youll be sued for damages. You will be ruined.
Now take your garbage proposal and get to the conference room.
He had me there. Sabotaging a major deal was grounds for a for-cause dismissal.
But I had already rolled the dice.
I nodded. Okay. Ill go.
Ten oclock. The conference room.
Victor Sterling, the CEO of Apex Corp, sat across the table with his team, exuding an aura of pure power. Cross sat at the head of the table, his face plastered with a sycophantic grin. He kept shooting me frantic looks that screamed, Nail this, or Ill kill you.
I gave him a reassuring glance, powered on the projector, and opened the file.
Good morning, everyone. My name is Lana.
Our core philosophy for this partnership is detailed in the presentation. Please take the next five minutes to review it at your leisure.
And with that, I sat down, pulled out my phone, and started scrolling through social media.
The room fell into a dead, shocked silence.
Five minutes later, Mr. Sterlings patience snapped. He slammed his pen on the table. Mr. Cross, is this your idea of a serious proposal? Is that it?
Beads of sweat popped on Crosss forehead. He scrambled to his feet. A misunderstanding! Mr. Sterling, this is our lead manager she must have brought the wrong version! Lana, what are you doing? Explain yourself!
I looked up from my phone, my expression one of pure, innocent confusion. The wrong version? No, Mr. Cross. This is the one. You taught me yesterday, remember? For a thousand-dollar paycheck, who needs in-depth analysis?
I looked over at the client. He also told me that with our companys powerful platform, he could handle things personally. My greatest contribution would be to just stay quiet.
You you Cross was shaking with uncontrollable rage.
Mr. Sterling let out a cold laugh and stood, straightening his suit jacket. It seems your company has some serious internal management issues. If you cant even manage your own employees, how can you possibly manage our projects? Were done here. Dont contact us again.
His team swept out of the room without a backward glance.
The moment the door clicked shut, the air in the room seemed to crystallize.
Cross turned slowly, his face a mask of pure fury.
Lana you are so fucking dead.
With a primal scream, he snatched the heavy ceramic mug from the table, still steaming with hot coffee, and hurled it at my head with all his might.
Pain exploded above my eye, and hot liquid streamed down my face.
Twenty million! That was a twenty-million-dollar deal! You backstabbing bitch! Id get more loyalty from a stray dog!
Cross had completely lost it. Seeing I hadnt moved, he lunged across the room, grabbed a fistful of my hair, and slammed my head against the conference table.
I managed to shield the back of my head and my torso, bracing as he vented his fury.
You want to talk about labor laws? You want your money? Ill give you what you deserve!
A steel-toed shoe slammed into my stomach, sending me sprawling to the floor. Even as I curled into a ball, the kicks kept coming.
I could beat you to death right here, and all it would cost me is money! And I have plenty of that! he shrieked, his voice cracking. But you, you worthless, ungrateful whore, Im going to make sure you are blacklisted in this entire industry! Well see who hires you then!
What the hell are you? Huh? A piece of trash with no family, too stupid to know your place!
Agony ripped through me, and cold sweat drenched my clothes, but I bit my lip and didnt make a sound. Through the glass walls, I could see my colleagues staring, some screaming, but not one of them dared to intervene.
After what felt like an eternity, Cross finally stopped, panting heavily. He spat on my face.
Straightening his tie, he looked down at my bloodied form and sneered. Feel good? Thats what happens when you cross me.
Dont play dead. Get up. Im having HR transfer you to janitorial. From now on, youll be scrubbing toilets, and Ill be watching. If theyre not clean enough, Ill do this all over again. Lets see how tough you really are.
He kicked a chair out of his way and stormed out.
The conference room was a wreck.
Lily rushed in, crying, trying to help me up. Lana Lana, are you okay? Should I call an ambulance?
I gently pushed her away and pulled out the phone I had been clutching tightly in my pocket.
The screen was still on. The video recording icon was still blinking.
I opened a social media app and created a new post.
Title: 5-Year Sales Champion. 0-000k Bonus Stolen. Beaten by Boss for Asking Why.
Within minutes, the notification counter was already stuck at 99+.
Noah Cross, I thought, a grim smile touching my lips. Get ready to go viral.
But just as I hit post, the conference room door was thrown open again.
You! Youre finished!

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