No Longer Craving My Brother’s Love

For my eighteenth birthday, my brother finally decided to throw me a party.
When it was time for pictures, he shoved my face into the cake, completely ignoring the plastic support rods inside.
My adopted sister, Luna, flashed her sweetest smile for the camera while the world through my left eye blurred into darkness.
Later, while I was getting stitched up at the hospital, Luna posted two photos to her Instagram.
One was her early acceptance letter to Northwood University.
The other was a selfie of her and my brother, Ethan, at Disneyland.
The caption read:
My dream school and my favorite person, all mine on this special day. PS: My brother's surprise was HILARIOUS!!!
So that was it. My "birthday party" was just a surprise for Luna.
This time, I didn't throw a tantrum. I didn't scream or cry. I simply liked the post and left a comment:
From now on, every day will be special. Because he's all yours, forever.
Then I turned and accepted my own early admission offer from MIT.

1
"Zoe! What the hell was that comment? Lunas coughing up blood because of you! Do you have any idea she just got her acceptance letter from Northwood today? You've ruined the best moment of her life! Get your ass back here and apologize, or don't ever call me your brother again!"
He hung up before I could say a word.
A bitter laugh escaped my lips.
Luna getting into Northwood was the best moment of her life, but my eighteenth birthday meant nothing?
Why why did he trade my sight for her smile?
I pressed a hand over my bandaged left eye, biting my lip to hold back the tears. The doctor said crying would only make the recovery worse.
But the injustice of it all was a suffocating weight.
Lunas blood was fake. Mine was real.
After Ethan had shoved my head into the cake, I could feel the warm stickiness of blood mixing with the frosting. But he just smiled, satisfied with the picture-perfect shot of Luna's delighted face. Hed given me a careless glance and said, "Luna wants to go to Disneyland. Wash your face and order yourself some takeout."
Luna had giggled. "Sorry, sis, but that was just too funny!"
I couldn't fathom how someone could find joy in another's pain.
All I knew was that when the doctor told me I might never see out of my left eye again, my heart plummeted into an icy abyss.
"An injury this severe," the doctor asked gently, "where's your family?"
I froze.
And I realized, in that sterile white room, that I didn't have one anymore.
My parents were firefighters. They died in the line of duty, saving Luna from a house fire. With their last breaths, they pushed her into my brother's arms.
From that day on, Ethan treated Luna like a sacred medal of honor, a living testament to our parents' heroism. The fire had damaged her respiratory system, leaving her with a chronic condition. Once, during an argument, she happened to cough up blood, and from then on, I was forbidden from ever "bullying" my little sister.
It was like shed unlocked a new superpower. Any time I did something she didnt like, shed produce a dramatic mouthful of blood. I tried to tell Ethan she was using fake blood capsules. I even managed to steal one and show it to him. My reward was three days locked in the attic.
He hated liars, he said.
That day, the girl who had once craved her brothers affection more than anything in the world looked at the doctor and shook her head.
"I don't have a family."

2
I didnt go home to apologize to Luna.
Instead, I opened a bookmarked webpage on my phone and clicked confirm on a notification Id been hesitating over for weeks.
It was the official acceptance of my early admission offer from MIT.
For years, I had lived in fear of outshining Luna. A few years back, Id accidentally scored a few points higher than her on a test. She came home and fell gravely ill, her bedsheets stained with blood. I spent three days locked in the attic, forced to write a ten-thousand-word apology letter.
Only when I sobbed that I would never dare to steal her spotlight again did Ethan finally open the door.
He sighed, his voice laced with disappointment. "She's your sister, Zoe. Mom and Dad died to save her. You should let her have her moment."
Tears streamed down my face as I nodded.
But I had. I had let her.
If Luna scored a 90, I made damn sure I never got more than an 85.
And still, Ethans world revolved entirely around her.
Sometimes I wondered who his real sister was.
But I never dared to ask. I was too afraid of the suffocating darkness of the attic, of the endless, soul-crushing apology letters.
Now, it didn't matter anymore.
I was done with him.
With my early admission secured, my high school classes were just a formality. The acceptance also came with a hefty scholarship.
I collected the money, got permission from my teachers for an extended leave of absence, and bought a train ticket to Colorado.
I had to escape that suffocating house. I had to see the wide-open sky.
If I had no home, then the whole world would be my home.

3
I was somewhere deep in the Rocky Mountains when Ethans call came through.
"What's this about an extended leave? It was your fault to begin with, so why is it so hard for you to apologize to your sister? Zoe, who taught you to be so stubborn? I say two words to you and you run away from home? Let's be real, do you even know where you stand? Did you get early admission like Luna? No. You're not half the student she is, so what gives you the right to run off and give me attitude! You have three days. If you're not back, then don't ever bother coming back!"
As always, he hung up before I could get a word in.
A moment later, a text alert popped up on my screen.
My bank account had been frozen.
A bitter smile twisted my lips. He didnt call to see if I was safe after all this time, he just cut off my money
Thank god the scholarship money was in a different account.
I didn't need his pathetic few hundred dollars.

4
Three days later, I didn't go back.
But Ethan didn't call, or even text.
I didn't care. I headed north, making my way up to Chicago.
For two solid weeks, I had zero contact with my family.
I'd almost forgotten they existed until a call from Luna shattered the peace.
"Oh, sister where are you? We're back from our trip, and Maria said you haven't been home at all. Sister, it was my fault, please come back"
Her voice was frail and pitiful, as if she were genuinely worried about me.
But if she really cared, how could she have laughed so gleefully while I was bleeding?
Ethan's voice cut in from the background. "Alright, Zoe, Luna has forgiven you. You can stop this little tantrum now."
A smirk played on my lips. "What did I do that requires her forgiveness?"
There was a stunned silence on the other end.
Ethan sighed heavily. "Look, I know you're upset about the cake. But Luna getting into Northwood is a huge deal for her, one of the most important days of her life. You're her older sister. Don't be so petty. Let's just move past this. I've unfrozen your card. Come home."
Right on cue, a notification popped up on my phone.
Hed transferred me a thousand dollars.
It wasn't even enough for a train ticket home.
I truly didn't understand him. He'd drop tens of thousands on Luna without blinking, but with me, he was a penny-pincher. It wasn't like our family couldn't afford to treat us equally. He was just terrified I'd steal her thunder.
"No, thank you, Ethan," I said, my voice flat. "I won't be needing your money anymore."
"You!"
"Oh, and I'm already on my way back. I'll be there tonight. Don't worry about me, I'm just staying one night and then I'm gone."
The line was quiet for a moment before Ethan sighed again, his tone softening. "Zoe, it was my fault. I'm sorry. Please don't take it out on Luna. I'll pick you up at the station tonight. We can have a proper family dinner, my treat. A real birthday celebration for you, okay?"
Before I could refuse, he pressed on. "I'm heading to the station now. I'll wait for you at the exit."
And he hung up.
I sighed, canceling the shuttle bus ticket Id just booked.

5
The train pulled in at 5:30 PM.
I scanned the crowd at the exit, but Ethan was nowhere in sight.
A text came through: Something came up. I'll be a little late.
I found a bench and sat down.
I waited until the sky was pitch black, but he never showed.
My calls went straight to voicemail.
The last bus home had left two hours ago.
With no other choice, I started walking toward a nearby hotel. The streetlights cast long, eerie shadows on the dark pavement. I heard footsteps behind me, quickening their pace. I glanced over my shoulder, but saw nothing.
I walked faster. The footsteps behind me matched my pace. I spun around, and a figure darted into the darkness just beyond the reach of the streetlight.
My heart hammered against my ribs. I picked up my speed, fumbling for my phone and dialing Ethan's number again.
Still no answer.
I held the silent phone to my ear and raised my voice, feigning a conversation. "Hey, Ethan! I'm almost there, can you come down and meet me?"
The footsteps behind me suddenly broke into a run. I whipped my head around to see a dark shape sprinting toward me.
I bolted.
But the gap between us closed with terrifying speed. In the reflection of a storefront window, I could see a hand reaching for me, inches from grabbing my jacket.
I saw a person walking in the distance and screamed with every ounce of air in my lungs. "Honey! Help me!"
The footsteps behind me faltered. The man in the distance hesitated for a second, then strode quickly toward me. I didn't think twice; I ran straight into his arms.
"Honey! Thank God you're here!"
The figure behind us walked past, pretending to be a casual pedestrian, glancing around aimlessly. When our eyes met for a fleeting second, I saw a flash of raw, bitter hatred in his cold, unsettling eyes.
A hand rested gently on my waist, and a calm, steady voice murmured in my ear, "It's okay. You're safe. Let's go."
He pulled me closer, steering me in the opposite direction of the man. My pulse was a frantic drum against my temples. I was just about to let out a sigh of relief when a chill ran down my spine.
I looked up at the handsome, composed face of the man holding me, and my stomach clenched.
In the dead of night, what were the chances he just happened to be right here?

6
I shoved him away, my phone gripped tightly in my hand.
He looked surprised for a moment as my thumb hovered over the emergency call button.
"You don't trust me?"
He chuckled softly, a sound that made my hand tremble, and my phone clattered to the pavement.
I bent down to grab it, but his hand was already there, covering mine. He picked it up, looked me in the eye, and calmly dialed 911.
"Hello? West 51st Street. There's a man harassing a young woman here."
After he hung up, he gently tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear, his voice a low murmur. "What happened to 'honey'?"
I was too stunned to speak.
He smiled, a slow, easy grin. "The name's Leo."

7
Leo and I spent the rest of the night at the police station.
By the time I got home the next day, the police had already arrested my attacker. They found a butcher knife and a set of dismemberment tools in his possession.
I had been terrifyingly close to becoming a statistic.
My hands were still trembling as I pushed open the front door. The familiar aroma of home-cooked porridge filled the air. It wasn't the scent of our housekeeper's cooking, which meant
Sure enough, there was Ethan in the kitchen, wearing a cartoon apron, setting a bowl of hot porridge in front of Luna.
They were laughing and talking, having seemingly forgotten theyd ever promised to pick someone up.
He noticed me and frowned. "Where have you been? You couldn't find your own way back just because I didn't pick you up? And whats with the bandage? Take that ridiculous thing off!"
I ignored him, walked to the fridge, grabbed a bottle of water, and chugged it down, trying to wash away the exhaustion. As I walked past him toward the stairs, I didn't even give him a second glance.
"Zoe."
His hand clamped down on my shoulder.
I turned. He was still frowning, his expression awkward, as if the words were being dragged from him against his will. "Look Luna was so worried about you yesterday, she coughed up blood right before we were supposed to leave. I had to take care of her."
I nodded, my voice devoid of emotion. "Okay."
His eyes widened slightly.
In the past, I was always the one to back down first. From writing apology letters as a child to begging for his forgiveness as a teen. Any time he offered the slightest olive branch, I would be overjoyed, rushing to forgive him for everything.
He was used to a single conciliatory glance from him sending me into a flood of grateful tears.
My simple, flat "okay" threw him completely off balance.
It even seemed to make him angry.
But before he could scowl any deeper, I pinched the bridge of my nose, feigning impatience. "If that's all, I'm going to bed. It's been a long couple of days."
He just stared, speechless.
I walked around him, went upstairs, and opened my bedroom door.
The sight that greeted me was one of utter devastation.

8
My practice exams were shredded into confetti, marked with angry red X's and scattered across the floor. My notes from three years of high school were ripped to pieces, drenched in red ink.
Carved into my now-empty desk, over and over again, were the words SLUT and DIE.
I picked up a fragment of a page.
The childish, looping handwriting of the insults was unmistakably Luna's.
"Zoe" Ethan said from behind me, his voice filled with shock as he took in the wreckage.
I turned to look at him, my expression cold as ice. Downstairs, Luna was just finishing her last spoonful of porridge.
She placed a fake blood capsule in her mouth, bit down, and then crumpled to the floor with a pained frown. "Ethan I it hurts so much"
My gaze remained fixed on Luna, and Ethans brows immediately furrowed in my direction. "Stop making a scene the second you're back!" he snapped at me.
He rushed down the stairs and scooped Luna into his arms, his voice softening to a gentle murmur. "Shh, it's okay. I'm taking you to the hospital right now. Don't be scared."
Then he looked up at me, standing at the top of the stairs, and shot me a look of pure venom.
It was always the same.
Even though no one else in the house would ever do something like this, the moment Luna coughed up blood, nothing else mattered.
The old me would have probably cried and screamed, desperately trying to explain.
But now, I just turned back to my ruined room, quietly cleaned up the mess, and collapsed onto my bed, falling into a deep, exhausted sleep.
I didn't let either of them affect me in the slightest.

9
The next day, Luna shared a news article on her social media.
It was about a high school senior who had lost all her study notes right before final exams.
Her comment: Losing something so important I bet her exam scores are going to be a disaster, right?
I glanced at the bag of shredded paper in my trash can and let out a cynical laugh.
Before I could even type out a reply, my bedroom door was kicked open.
Ethan stood there, his face contorted with rage. "When did you learn to frame people? Luna told me she never set foot in your room, and Maria wouldn't dare touch your things. Did you really think I wouldn't see through this pathetic attempt to set up your own sister? If it weren't for you, she wouldn't have gotten so worked up trying to explain herself that she coughed up blood again!"
Over his shoulder, I could see Luna, her eyes red-rimmed and brimming with tears, the perfect picture of wounded innocence.
I scoffed. "I framed her? I just got back last night. How could I have framed her? And look at the carving on that desk. Its hideous. I have much better handwriting than that."
"Sister" Luna's voice trembled as tears spilled down her cheeks. "I know you were hurt on your birthday, but you can't just hire someone to do this and then throw such horrible accusations at me!"
Her words fueled Ethan's fury.
He grabbed my arm, his eyes filled with a level of disappointment and disgust I had never seen before. "And to think I actually felt sorry for you, being out there all alone. I wanted to welcome you home, to make things right. But you just had to push it, didn't you? You even stooped low enough to go after Luna! People like you should just die out there and never come back!"
He shoved me hard. "Get out! And don't ever let me see you again!"
I stumbled backward, barely catching the banister to keep from tumbling down the stairs.
I steadied myself and looked back at him one last time.
"You almost got your wish."
If it hadn't been for Leo.
Ethan froze.
I didn't say another word. I turned and walked down the stairs.
Behind me, I heard Luna's syrupy voice. "Ethan, don't you think that was a little harsh?"
And his, cold and dismissive. "Don't worry. She'll come crawling back in a few days. And when she does, don't you dare go soft on her. It's time someone knocked that attitude out of her. The real world isn't going to baby her like I do."
I looked down as Maria, our housekeeper, pushed my suitcase toward the door.
She had hastily packed my things.
Her voice was full of apology. "I'm so sorry, Miss Zoe. Mr. Ethan told me to clear out all of your belongings."
A bitter laugh escaped my lips.
Baby me? When had he ever done that?

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